Oneirophobia 1/12
Title: Oneirophobia (Part One: James Tiberius Kirk)
Genre: Fanfiction. (DOCTOR WHO/STAR TREK 2009) Crazy crossovers. Slash. Het.
Summary: Nightmares can be a weapon when used against a good man. Jack Harkness is searching to find eleven people with truly horrific nightmares to save the Doctor from being tormented by the Nightmare Child. One of them is an old friend who has finally gotten his life together.
Being on the Tardis was like being held in a warm and comfortable embrace and it eased him. The burden of freeing the Doctor somehow felt less insurmountable. Jack felt less inadequate to the task. But it still somehow felt wrong. The Doctor's coat was draped across the back of the chair and it let Jack pretend that he'd stepped out for a minute. Or that he was elsewhere on the Tardis, awake and unharmed. It wasn't right. There was no one chattering behind him. No laughter. No crazy and only vaguely articulate rants. He kept expecting the Doctor to appear or say something, but the Tardis was quiet and Jack was the only one in the room. He'd been curled up on the floor when Jack first found the Tardis by the Powell Estate. He'd moved the man to in the infirmary, but that had somehow seemed worse than leaving him on the floor. He looked so small and unwell that Jack couldn't bear to leave him alone. Jack's next thought had been to put the Doctor in his own bedroom. But Jack didn't know where the Doctor's bedroom was and once it became obvious that the Tardis wasn't going to rearrange her rooms to help Jack find the Doctor's he took the Doctor to his old room.
Everything was exactly as he had left it before he had died for the first time and what ought to have been the only time. His clothes, his books and everything he had kept on the Tardis was still there. None of it had been moved. Jack settled the Doctor on his bed, making him as comfortable as possible before leaving him there. The urge to stay and just watch over him was strong, but he forced it aside and returned to the main console.
Jack let his fingertips run across the buttons and knobs on the console and closed his eyes. "I'm here. I came to help him. I'm going to get him out of there. I won't let the Nightmare Child hurt him. But I need you to help me. Can you do that? He told me that you're still connected. Can you help me find the others? I need to know who they are. I need to find them. I can't stop the nightmares unless I find their source."
Eyes drifting open, Jack caught sight of text on the vid screen and read slowly. Eleven names. Some of them were unknown him and others vaguely familiar while one name, seemingly ordinary, jumped out at him from the middle of the list. A slow breath of something near relief escaped him as the task before began to feel at least somewhat less intangible. He knew, at least, that he could find and persuade one of them to help.
Jack found him easily enough and followed the Enterprise in the Tardis until they stopped at a planet for shore leave. He watched them for a while, and smiled to see the young man so confident and capable. Hours later Jack found Captain James Tiberius Kirk surrounded by his friends, his crew, at a small out of the way bar drinking, eating and laughing. It was a far cry from how he had been when Jack first met him. For a moment Jack considered leaving. He was happy. He was doing well. What right did he have to drag him away and demand his assistance? He might have left. Jack wouldn't have given up permanently, but he might have backed out and let Jim enjoy this time with his friends. After everything that had happened during his youth, after the destruction of Vulcan and during the first year of his Captaincy, surely Jim deserved a break. But Jim looked up and away from his friends and when he caught sight of Jack his grin was so pleased and sincere that Jack wanted the ground to swallow him up. What right did he have to drag these memories up? With Jim, at least, he understood very well the content on the nightmares and felt like an absolute wretch.
"Captain Harkness!"
The shock and disbelief colored with happiness made Jack smile, "Captain Kirk."
James Kirk smiled a little at the title, his eyes lighting up, "You heard about my promotion?"
"I heard. Congratulations."
"Thanks. But what are you doing here?"
"Trying to catch up with you. I need to talk to you."
"What's wrong?" Jim asked quickly. "Is it-"
"No!" Jack said quickly, "No. It's nothing to do with that. I promise. I need your help." Try as he might, Jack couldn't stop himself from remembering the first time he had met James Kirk. He had been so sure that the small boy lying in the dirt had truly been dead like all the others instead of pretending. And once he had realized the boy was still alive, Jack was terrified that it wouldn't last. "Can I speak with you privately for a moment?"
"Oh. Of course, I-"
"Captain," the Vulacn seated by Jim who Jack knew to be Spock spoke up, moving to join them a few feet away from their table of friends. He too was familiar to Jack, though they had never met. Spock of Vulcan and Earth was well known for his mere existence, but also for his exemplary service in Starfleet and his unparalleled abilities as a scientist. "I must protest. This man-"
"I've known Captain Harkness for a long time, Spock," Jim said gently. "We're old friends."
Something about the statement caused the Vulcan's blank expression to tighten slightly. He seemed uncomfortable. Or angry. Studying him, Jack wondered if it was somehow possible he was jealous. He might be half human, but he was culturally Vulcan. Wouldn't being jealous being illogical or something? It wasn't as though Jim had any kind of sexual history with Jack. They'd first met when Jim was a boy. But Jim never talked about his past, so chances were that Spock simply didn't know. But why should he care? Jim had identified Jack as an old friend and Jack had given the Vulcan no reason to be suspicious of him.
"There are no Starfleet Captain's named Harkness," Spock objected.
"I'm not in Starfleet, Mr. Spock," Jack explained politely, pushing aside his impatience, "I'm a civilian. But I have a ship."
Jim grinned suddenly, "Is your ship broken again, Jack? Is that why you're looking for me?"
"Different ship, kid," Jack said, "Its not broken. And even if it was you barely remember how you fixed it last time. The Tarids is the best ship in the world."
Jim laughed a little, "I'm partial to the Enterprise, but I'll take your word that your new ship is shiny." He led Jack a short distance away from Vulcan. and his other friends at the table. "So, what's up old man?"
Jack rolled his eyes a little, "I'm not much older than you, Jim."
"That certainly wasn't true the last time I saw you. Ten years since the first time I met you and you haven't aged a day."
Jack shrugged. He trusted Jim, but now wasn't the time to share that particular secret. "I need to share a great deal of information with you very quickly."
Jim's smile was overtaken by instant wariness and he put his hands up in front of his face, "Don't!"
"Don't what?"
Jim glanced back at the table and when he caught sight of Spock's unblinking gaze, he took Jack by the wrist and led him outside. "Don't meld with me."
"Meld with you?" Jack demanded, "What the hell, Jim? Do I look Vulcan?"
"You're slightly psychic," Jim demanded, though he let his hands drop, "No playing around with my mind."
Jack's eyes widened, "Has Spock taken liberties with your mind? Were you hurt?"
"Yes. No!" Jim practically shouted, "I mean. Um. It wasn't him exactly and he didn't mean to."
Jack narrowed his eyes. There was something about the nonsensical reply that nagged at Jack. "Jim. Have you been playing with the time stream?"
"No," Jim shook his head, but looked far less shocked by the question than he ought to have. "I've never traveled in time."
Jack winced a little because although Jim didn't remember it he had traveled in time. "Has Spock?"
Jim sighed, "I can't tell you."
"Very well," Jack said, "Take a walk with me. I want to show you the ship. I'll explain everything then."
Jim shrugged, "Sure."
Jim's frown and Jack's grin of anticipation became more pronounced the closer they got to the Tardis. Jim studied the blue box, walking around it slowly, the expression on his face clearly indicating that he thought Jack was crazy. Jack grinned and pulled a necklace out from under his shirt, using the key hanging from it to unlock the front door. "Prepare to be amazed."
Jim gave him a skeptical glance that was startling in its resemblance of Vulcan skepticism. Exactly how much time was Jim spending with his Vulcan first officer? Pushing the doors open, Jack leaned against the doorjam and gestured for Jim to enter. Jim paused at the threshold and stared inside the Tardis, his mouth open. "What the fuck...?"
Jack grinned and showed Jim, "she's called the Tardis. Time and relative dimension in space. Tardis."
"But it just looks like a wooden box on the outside. What the hell kind of ship is this, Jack?"
Jack glanced over Jim's shoulder and hesitated briefly when he saw his stone faced and clearly disapproving Vulcan first officer approaching. Jack pulled the doors closed and turned to Jim. "The ship has a chameleon device."
"A what?"
"A chameleon device. It's like a cloak of sorts, but instead of invisibility it lets the ship blend in with its surroundings. The device got stuck on this one a while ago and no one ever bothered to fix it."
"Time and relative dimension in space," Jim repeated slowly, "Are you trying to say that this ship can move through time and space? I would say thats impossible, but I've seen firsthand that time travel is possible. But that was spontaneous, uncontrolled and unintended. The Tardis can move through time at will?"
"Yes."
"And its bigger on the inside."
Jack laughed, "Is it?"
"Where did you find this ship? This kind of technology is amazing."
"This is a Time Lord ship. It belongs to a friend of mine."
"Can I meet your friend? Can I see the engines? What type of fuel does it use? Is it capable of warp travel? Exactly how big is this ship?"
Jack smiled a little at Jim's exuberant explosion of questions, though the happiness of seeing Jim again was beginning to fade as Jack could no longer postpone explaining to Jim why he had come. "I'll show you all the ship and answer all of your questions, but first I need to tell you why I came to find you."
Jim hopped into the chair, his attention half on the admittedly strange controls on the main console. "Okay. Tell me."
"The first time we met I woke up on that hellhole of a planet with no memory of how I had gotten there."
"You were probably injured in one of the riots," Jim said quietly, his eyes no longer studying the controls but not meeting Jack's gaze either.
"But I was well fed. I hadn't experienced the famine or rationing."
Jim tensed, his eyes and staring at his own feet, "I just assumed that you were only of the few so called worthy colonists to grow a conscious when things got truly ugly."
"I don't remember two years of my life before I met you, but I'm sure that I wasn't living on that planet."
Jim finally met his gaze, "How can you be sure?"
"Because I was working for the Time Agency."
"The what?"
"The Time Agency," Jack repeated, "But that isn't important right now. Well, maybe it is. I had this device, sort of like a small and way less flash version of the Tardis, and thats what I used to get us back to Earth. It was damaged and you helped me fix it, but you were so out of it that you don't remember that it was a device and not a ship. And thats what I used to help you when they came after you later. After I brought you home I was determined to get my memories back and screw the Agency as much as possible for stealing them in the first place. I conned the Agency out of a serious amount of money. I was needed to pull one more con to have enough money to bribe one of their doctors to give my memories back when I met the Doctor."
"The Doctor? Is that what your friend is called?" Jim asked quietly, his gaze intent on Jack.
Jack nodded, "I- I almost hurt a lot of innocent people. I didn't mean to, but if the Doctor hadn't been there nanogenes that I'd unwilling released from a Chula field ambulance were mutating people. The Doctor set it straight and invited me to travel with him on the Tardis. This is his ship. There was a girl traveling with him called Rose and for a while the three of us traveled together through time and space. We just went from place to place, visiting and seeing new things and helping out where we could." Jack sighed a little. So long as he lived he would never forget those days. The Doctor and Rose in the Tardis. It was better than anything.
"But then the Daleks came. The Doctor had a plan to defeat them and he sent Rose home so she'd be face. I tried... I knew we couldn't stop them so I tried to buy him as much time as possible." Exterminate. Jack closed his eyes briefly. Sometimes, in the moment before he died, he heard that voice. "They killed me."
Jim startled, "What?"
"They killed me. I was dead. But Rose... she was so determined to come back and save the Doctor that she looked into the time vortex. She destroyed the Daleks, saved the Doctor... saved the whole of Earth actually... and then... I was dead but I heard her voice. It was like she whispering to me.... I bring life. And I was alive. I've died over and over since then, Jim. I've died so many times...but I keep coming back. And my aging has drastically slowed which is why I don't look any different to you."
Jim stood and for a brief moment Jack's hands trembled because he thought Jim was going to leave, but the younger man pulled him into a fierce embrace and clung to him. Jim took enough of a step back to take Jack's hands after a holding him for several minutes. "I don't know what to say, Jack. It sounds..." Jim shook his head and let the sentence trail off. "I'm glad you told me."
"Trust is never going to be an issue between us, kid," Jack said gently.
Jim was quiet for a moment, his eyes distant. "I know. So if this ship belongs to the Doctor, where is he?"
"That's why I need your help," Jack said slowly, "The Doctor has been imprisoned by an old enemy called the Nightmare Child."
"Imprisoned where? Do you need help breaking him out?"
"He's imprisoned in nightmares, Jim. His body is here on the Tardis, but his mind is trapped in nightmares. Other people’s nightmares. And one of those nightmares is yours."