(no subject)
so ya today was a good day. nya wants to get back together and just wing it this time instead of trying to plan life to a t, witch i knew she would eventually lol. id like to say that women are sooo predictable but more often than not, nahhhhhh they are sooooo not lol. im glad that she wants to make it work, i really do feel a strong bond with her i havnt fealt since a dated jenny kathe in high school. speaking of her not too long ago i actually had a descent conversation with her on aim and to be totally out in the open, it gave me the closure i was lookin for. got that feeling of forgiveness, however i dont know what i did to beg for forgivness and i wasnt about to ask because acting on past events i knew that that descent conversation would immediatly turn to shit. her endeavors have been similar to mine with drugs and alcohol but i doubt she dove into it as hard as i did. enought of talkin about that now and on to other news. so i tried to do some leg press's on the ol' crossbow today because i needed to change things up with my workout and the way you have to get set up to do leg press's is a bit rediculous. you put a strap around your lower back and connect it to the cables that run off the weight system and i must say it is the most uncomfortable way to workout the ol legs. gives you a helluva work out but damn is it brutal on the back. every day when i get outa the shower in the morning i find a good sense of gratitude when i look into the mirror these days. not too long ago i was a mere 155 pounds and now im up to 180 on my way to 190. 215 would be nice but my goal is 190 and i think ill tap that ass around my bday. along with a good wrokout routine ive also been eating like a mad man lately. tonite i had the kings meal for a whap lol. i made spagetti with meat sauce and a garden salad on the side. lets just say it was like thanksgiving at joes all over again lol. right after dinner i had to take a shit and even after doing so i wighed a whopping 185. lets just say that i made a whole box a pasta, a whole jar a sauce and a pound of ground beef. the old man only ate one scoop a pasta and one ladel of the sauce. i ate the rest. he even doubted that i would eat it all but sure in shit i did. but surprisingly enough im still hungry. i think il have a samitch. yup things are getting back to the way they were before i started doin drugs, its great. the only urges i get nowa days is to smoke some herb. personally i dont think that smokin a bit a herb should be a crime, the real crime is makin it a crime to smoke up in the first place lol. its fo my cadaracs nigga....ma cadaracks.....yea. but even though the urges have been strong ive managed to not toke up. hell a couple a weeks ago i broke down and finally gave away the bongage! looney passed it on to me so i passed it on to jay, he was happy, means alot to him seein how looneys one of his few freinds still alive but he wont be for long on account he got hep c from sharin a needle. tough break but thats the type a shit that will happen when you do that shit. i tried to tell jay that he has to follow with tradition and smoke only headie bud with that peice but i know damn well he wont, mutha facka. so ive been listening to some differnet music than usual lately, i got back into eve 6 and three doors down, pearljam, collective soul, counting crows. lfo, goo goo dolls, third eye blind. pretty much all the shit i used to listen to when i was a kid in the 90's. last night, well early this morning i should say i decided to jam out for a lil while and i dont know how to describe it. i think the best way would be to say that it fealt like someone else was playin and it wudnt me. its like i had SRVs hads or sumthing cuz i just plugged in and then belted out this ridiculously awesome jam. so i keapt on goin and i belted out like three sick tunes and then i went back to bed and watched scream cuz thats what was on at like 3 in the damn mornin. idk why but i really havnt been sleepin well. it sucks, when i finally do get to sleep its like 4 am and im sleepin in to noon. well thats it for now.