Lost in a my own world
Lost in my own little world with only one way out. I can't reach to anyone to help me out of this world because I created it with my own thoughts and dreams. The only thing I forgot about was someone. A person to hold me when it gets cold. To dry my tears when the outside world throws things my way. Some one to say great job. To congratulate me on my successes and help me with my faults. So I try to step outside into the bright world. I blink and step out. Instantly I can't stand it. I have no one to trust out here. I have to hide and look both ways with every step. The world continues without me but I must react as if I have been here the whole time. So how do I do this? Stay safe inside my world, but invite someone into it? I cant do it. I don't trust anyone. I can't I sometimes can't even trust myself. I want to love, but with wanting to love i grow to hate the people that couldn't love me or that I couldn't love. So how many people do i have to hate before I find the one I love? Hate is a strong, but inevitable feeling. Yes is goes away, but not without pain. So much pain in the past 20 years. So I ask you... if I should bleed with cuts of love rather than live without any scars... then where is my tourniquet. The one to stop the bleeding, but also the one that makes me so vulnerable that they could make me bleed for all eternity?