Chickens and Eggs (Tony Stark to the Assembly)
After Rogue's speech, the assembly takes a short recess. Tony retreats (of course) to the bar, where he meets Rogue herself, for a short chat.
Eventually, Irene Merryweather's voice comes on the loudspeakers and announces that the conference will be reconvening, before dividing into smaller breakout sessions. As the room fills up, most of the delegates head back to their chairs, but Tony keeps walking toward the podium, balancing a tumbler of Scotch in one hand. Cable, who is set to announce that the conference is back in session, sees Tony, shrugs, and steps aside, leaving Stark to quiet the room himself. This isn't very difficult because once the delegates realize who is at the podium, he very quickly gains their undivided attention. That isn't to say that the room becomes suddenly quiet. A few muffled cries of Go, Iron Man! and Tell 'em, Tony! rise from the gallery, but more prominent are Fascist! Drunk! and straight-up Asshole! The last is shouted, very distinctly from the back of the room. Tony turns and salutes.
"No, please. Go on. Tell me what you really think." Scanning the room, he says, "Or I can guess. Look, it's that drunken sonofabitch Tony Stark, here to give a little rant about the Registration Act before he goes off to get tanked and try to sleep with She-Hulk. Why should we listen to anything he has to say? Well." Tony sets the glass down and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. "It seems to me we've got a chicken and egg problem. Ask yourselves -- do you think that you don't want to listen to me because I'm a drunken sonofabitch? Or do you prefer to think that I'm just a drunken sonofabitch, because it's easier than listening to me?"
"Because I am going to stand here and I am going to tell you things that none of the other esteemed delegates are going to tell you. Except, this -- this --" He gestures out toward the audience. "Where are you? Rogue! This young mutant got up here to ask a question that nobody else was willing to ask. Where are the world's leaders? Where are the people with the power to make changes? From, the U.S., I see. . . Dr. Cooper is here, presumably to keep an eye on the X-men. Agent Carter is representing SHIELD, apparently as the highest ranking officer whose boyfriend is a delegate." He comes very close to looking for Captain America, at this point, but he takes another drink instead. "We have representatives from Venezuela, New Zealand, and, for some reason, France --" Tony takes a moment to reflect that he really doesn't like the way M. Javert is looking at him. "Which would be really great if we were trying to out-crazy, out-sheep-herd, and out-surrender the rest of the world. But we aren't." He turns to Cable. "We're not, are we, Dayspring? Because if that's the plan I stand corrected."
Cable visibly rolls his eyes, and signals with his hand for Stark to get on with it.
"Well. . .here we have another chicken and egg problem. Is this summit irrelevant because no one who matters is here? Or is no one here because this summit is irrelevant? During the recess, I spoke with this young lady -- Rogue -- and I asked her to explain to me her understanding of Magneto's political goals. Because, I said, if he actually has any goals aside from ruling the world along with a few handpicked mutant henchmen, I can't figure out what they're supposed to be. And this young lady -- even though, I can't help believing, she has reason to know -- this young lady could not provide me with an answer. I find this very telling. Very telling, and very sad, that an obviously intelligent, informed, enlightened young woman -- eager as she is for Magneto to receive a hearing, enthusiastically as she listened to his words -- even she cannot articulate a statement of his goals. I said to her then what I am going to say now. The President of the United States, the director of SHIELD, and Jesus Christ come down from the cross could be here, and it wouldn't matter, because Magneto's only stated goal is mutant superiority. And there is no way that citizens of the free world and believers in the equality of man can allow such a goal to be fulfilled."
Tony pauses to take another drink, and looks around the room. "Let me say a thing or two about mutants. When I see people, I don't see their genetic codes. I'm looking out in the crowd, I'm looking for Henry McCoy -- I see you there, Hank. Dr. McCoy -- some of you know him as one of the most brilliant scientific minds of our time. Some of you know him as the Beast. Hank worked beside me for years as an Avenger -- one of the most successful, one of the most popular members our team ever had. Cyclops over there. He represents the Xavier Institute. Charlie Xavier, one of the truly great men of our time. Cyclops mentioned his partner, Emma Frost. He didn't mention Jean Grey, who ran that institute before those two did, and currently leads the efforts of the revitalized X-Corporation. Pietro Maximoff, Magneto's own son. I've worked with this man. He's a good man. All of the people I have named -- good people. People, like Cyclops said. I've had my differences with some of them in the past. Hell, I've had my differences with just about everybody in the past. But the point is, I don't go to judge somebody by whether they're a mutant or not. I've known too many human sons-of-bitches. I've known too many good mutants. I'm not talking about them. "
"But now. You show me a guy who can stop bullets with his brain, move the Golden Gate bridge across San Francisco Bay, and some days, just for the pure hell of it, decides to set off a bomb in a busy street full of ordinary people just heading to work to pick up a paycheck. That's someone who could be using his power to help people, and instead he has made a choice to use that power to break down and destroy. We can all sit here and listen and try to 'understand' what 'drove him' to these actions. Then we can all go to our little group sessions and sing 'Free to Be You and Me' and practice trust exercise, and go home with our fair-trade hemp and granola T-shirts that say, 'Hey, at least I tried,' and next time Magneto blows something up, we can all pretend to be shocked. Because he gave such a pretty speech."
"And that is exactly what is going to happen. So I urge those in this room with the power to stand against Magneto to leave this place, not complacent that we have learned more about him, but convinced that he has no legitimate agenda, and determined to crush this viper before his poison infects the whole world. You say you wanted the world's attention, Magneto? Well, now you have it. You've just made yourself a priority, a target for all the right-thinking kind of people who have the strength and will to stop you. I'll be the first to put my name on that list. Anyone with the courage to stand with me, I commend you. The rest of you can go on living in your Cloud-Cuckooland -- your magical island -- your Mister Rogers' Neighborhood -- where all this sitting around to talk makes any difference at all."
"But then, what do I know? I'm just a drunken sonofabitch."
And with that, Tony Stark sits down.
Eventually, Irene Merryweather's voice comes on the loudspeakers and announces that the conference will be reconvening, before dividing into smaller breakout sessions. As the room fills up, most of the delegates head back to their chairs, but Tony keeps walking toward the podium, balancing a tumbler of Scotch in one hand. Cable, who is set to announce that the conference is back in session, sees Tony, shrugs, and steps aside, leaving Stark to quiet the room himself. This isn't very difficult because once the delegates realize who is at the podium, he very quickly gains their undivided attention. That isn't to say that the room becomes suddenly quiet. A few muffled cries of Go, Iron Man! and Tell 'em, Tony! rise from the gallery, but more prominent are Fascist! Drunk! and straight-up Asshole! The last is shouted, very distinctly from the back of the room. Tony turns and salutes.
"No, please. Go on. Tell me what you really think." Scanning the room, he says, "Or I can guess. Look, it's that drunken sonofabitch Tony Stark, here to give a little rant about the Registration Act before he goes off to get tanked and try to sleep with She-Hulk. Why should we listen to anything he has to say? Well." Tony sets the glass down and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. "It seems to me we've got a chicken and egg problem. Ask yourselves -- do you think that you don't want to listen to me because I'm a drunken sonofabitch? Or do you prefer to think that I'm just a drunken sonofabitch, because it's easier than listening to me?"
"Because I am going to stand here and I am going to tell you things that none of the other esteemed delegates are going to tell you. Except, this -- this --" He gestures out toward the audience. "Where are you? Rogue! This young mutant got up here to ask a question that nobody else was willing to ask. Where are the world's leaders? Where are the people with the power to make changes? From, the U.S., I see. . . Dr. Cooper is here, presumably to keep an eye on the X-men. Agent Carter is representing SHIELD, apparently as the highest ranking officer whose boyfriend is a delegate." He comes very close to looking for Captain America, at this point, but he takes another drink instead. "We have representatives from Venezuela, New Zealand, and, for some reason, France --" Tony takes a moment to reflect that he really doesn't like the way M. Javert is looking at him. "Which would be really great if we were trying to out-crazy, out-sheep-herd, and out-surrender the rest of the world. But we aren't." He turns to Cable. "We're not, are we, Dayspring? Because if that's the plan I stand corrected."
Cable visibly rolls his eyes, and signals with his hand for Stark to get on with it.
"Well. . .here we have another chicken and egg problem. Is this summit irrelevant because no one who matters is here? Or is no one here because this summit is irrelevant? During the recess, I spoke with this young lady -- Rogue -- and I asked her to explain to me her understanding of Magneto's political goals. Because, I said, if he actually has any goals aside from ruling the world along with a few handpicked mutant henchmen, I can't figure out what they're supposed to be. And this young lady -- even though, I can't help believing, she has reason to know -- this young lady could not provide me with an answer. I find this very telling. Very telling, and very sad, that an obviously intelligent, informed, enlightened young woman -- eager as she is for Magneto to receive a hearing, enthusiastically as she listened to his words -- even she cannot articulate a statement of his goals. I said to her then what I am going to say now. The President of the United States, the director of SHIELD, and Jesus Christ come down from the cross could be here, and it wouldn't matter, because Magneto's only stated goal is mutant superiority. And there is no way that citizens of the free world and believers in the equality of man can allow such a goal to be fulfilled."
Tony pauses to take another drink, and looks around the room. "Let me say a thing or two about mutants. When I see people, I don't see their genetic codes. I'm looking out in the crowd, I'm looking for Henry McCoy -- I see you there, Hank. Dr. McCoy -- some of you know him as one of the most brilliant scientific minds of our time. Some of you know him as the Beast. Hank worked beside me for years as an Avenger -- one of the most successful, one of the most popular members our team ever had. Cyclops over there. He represents the Xavier Institute. Charlie Xavier, one of the truly great men of our time. Cyclops mentioned his partner, Emma Frost. He didn't mention Jean Grey, who ran that institute before those two did, and currently leads the efforts of the revitalized X-Corporation. Pietro Maximoff, Magneto's own son. I've worked with this man. He's a good man. All of the people I have named -- good people. People, like Cyclops said. I've had my differences with some of them in the past. Hell, I've had my differences with just about everybody in the past. But the point is, I don't go to judge somebody by whether they're a mutant or not. I've known too many human sons-of-bitches. I've known too many good mutants. I'm not talking about them. "
"But now. You show me a guy who can stop bullets with his brain, move the Golden Gate bridge across San Francisco Bay, and some days, just for the pure hell of it, decides to set off a bomb in a busy street full of ordinary people just heading to work to pick up a paycheck. That's someone who could be using his power to help people, and instead he has made a choice to use that power to break down and destroy. We can all sit here and listen and try to 'understand' what 'drove him' to these actions. Then we can all go to our little group sessions and sing 'Free to Be You and Me' and practice trust exercise, and go home with our fair-trade hemp and granola T-shirts that say, 'Hey, at least I tried,' and next time Magneto blows something up, we can all pretend to be shocked. Because he gave such a pretty speech."
"And that is exactly what is going to happen. So I urge those in this room with the power to stand against Magneto to leave this place, not complacent that we have learned more about him, but convinced that he has no legitimate agenda, and determined to crush this viper before his poison infects the whole world. You say you wanted the world's attention, Magneto? Well, now you have it. You've just made yourself a priority, a target for all the right-thinking kind of people who have the strength and will to stop you. I'll be the first to put my name on that list. Anyone with the courage to stand with me, I commend you. The rest of you can go on living in your Cloud-Cuckooland -- your magical island -- your Mister Rogers' Neighborhood -- where all this sitting around to talk makes any difference at all."
"But then, what do I know? I'm just a drunken sonofabitch."
And with that, Tony Stark sits down.