Curiosity..
is it weird that i gravitate toward you cuz you're older and i feel like you know more about shit then i do? i like talking to you i just don't want to weird you out. and it sux cuz i feel like you have this door that you can open with all this experience about life and I want your opinion but I'm scared to open my mouth and ask.
Lots to do tomorrow. Have to take Grandma around and try to find her an apartment. I wish she would just shut her big ass mouth and let us take care of her. I don't like the idea of her living in some 12 story apartment complex all by herself. She's lonely enough as it is.
Her and my mother are very similar. I think it's all the shit they went through when they were younger. It's a common trait I see in women...certain women. And it seems to happen to the most interesting ones. They get old, they get stressed out, they deal with their problems in a way that forces them to kill who they really are. I've been fighting with this trend for several years now. I feel like I've lost a big part of myself so far, that I've become kind of 'numb', or empty...just like them. I see it in other people at my job, all my previous jobs really. But it hits the hardest at home. I wish I could motivate my mother to get off the couch. Some days I can't motivate myself to get out of bed. So I guess I'm no better. Take the fleck out of your own eye before you try and lead the blind so they say. But I have been trying, I have. I only picked up 4 days next month thats it. Maybe I'll put that free time into good use.
I freakin love Pandora. I like how it doesn't let you chose exactly which songs you want to listen to so you're forced to let youself come across something new. So far I've learned that I love The Beta Band, Kasabian, Audioslave, Corrosion of Conformity and Jimi Hendrix. And every time I log on it plays something else that I at least like. Plus, it reminds you of things you used to like but just...kind of forgot about. In high school my favorite bands were people like Eve 6, the Foo Fighters, FIF, TFK and random things like Bare Naked Ladies and Blues Traveler..and voila... you log into Pandora and you are enlightened.
I was at my mothers the other day and I sat down on the piano she bought me when I was 10 and tried to play some of my old pieces. I was never very good at sight reading, I played most of my pieces by ear. Which, everyone I've talked to is sooo jealous that I can do this, but in reality it kind of bites because if I want to learn something I've never heard it takes me forever to figure out how its supposed to sound from the sheet music. I tried to learn Tiny Dancer from Elton John. I got the first riff down, but again I know how its supposed to sound so...its deceving. And, honestly, it really comes down to knowing your instrument. If I close my eyes, I can almost always place my hand on the key that I want...so if you know the note you're looking for, your hand just kinda goes there without you really thinking about it. People ask me how I learned to play by ear and...thats the best explanation I can give I guess...
But I want to work on reading music definitely. Music was something that I've always loved to do. I'd like to get some jazzy pieces and learn some solos from Lynyrd Skynyrd. Maybe I could teach again. I miss that. My Les Paul needs attention too.
Gotta go to bed, gotta get up early. Getting the Jeep detailed before we leave so my ride will be fly lol. Yea. Later.
Lots to do tomorrow. Have to take Grandma around and try to find her an apartment. I wish she would just shut her big ass mouth and let us take care of her. I don't like the idea of her living in some 12 story apartment complex all by herself. She's lonely enough as it is.
Her and my mother are very similar. I think it's all the shit they went through when they were younger. It's a common trait I see in women...certain women. And it seems to happen to the most interesting ones. They get old, they get stressed out, they deal with their problems in a way that forces them to kill who they really are. I've been fighting with this trend for several years now. I feel like I've lost a big part of myself so far, that I've become kind of 'numb', or empty...just like them. I see it in other people at my job, all my previous jobs really. But it hits the hardest at home. I wish I could motivate my mother to get off the couch. Some days I can't motivate myself to get out of bed. So I guess I'm no better. Take the fleck out of your own eye before you try and lead the blind so they say. But I have been trying, I have. I only picked up 4 days next month thats it. Maybe I'll put that free time into good use.
I freakin love Pandora. I like how it doesn't let you chose exactly which songs you want to listen to so you're forced to let youself come across something new. So far I've learned that I love The Beta Band, Kasabian, Audioslave, Corrosion of Conformity and Jimi Hendrix. And every time I log on it plays something else that I at least like. Plus, it reminds you of things you used to like but just...kind of forgot about. In high school my favorite bands were people like Eve 6, the Foo Fighters, FIF, TFK and random things like Bare Naked Ladies and Blues Traveler..and voila... you log into Pandora and you are enlightened.
I was at my mothers the other day and I sat down on the piano she bought me when I was 10 and tried to play some of my old pieces. I was never very good at sight reading, I played most of my pieces by ear. Which, everyone I've talked to is sooo jealous that I can do this, but in reality it kind of bites because if I want to learn something I've never heard it takes me forever to figure out how its supposed to sound from the sheet music. I tried to learn Tiny Dancer from Elton John. I got the first riff down, but again I know how its supposed to sound so...its deceving. And, honestly, it really comes down to knowing your instrument. If I close my eyes, I can almost always place my hand on the key that I want...so if you know the note you're looking for, your hand just kinda goes there without you really thinking about it. People ask me how I learned to play by ear and...thats the best explanation I can give I guess...
But I want to work on reading music definitely. Music was something that I've always loved to do. I'd like to get some jazzy pieces and learn some solos from Lynyrd Skynyrd. Maybe I could teach again. I miss that. My Les Paul needs attention too.
Gotta go to bed, gotta get up early. Getting the Jeep detailed before we leave so my ride will be fly lol. Yea. Later.