(no subject)

[irishswimr213]

so i havent updated this since god knows when, but i feel like letting some feelings out, im feeling kind of emotional. this kid i barley knew died this weekend, he didnt know me but i knew him, he was in love with my best friend but she didnt give him the time of the day. he grew up being made fun of his whole life and now everyone feels like crap. rest in peace clem. anyways, so i have always liked brandon, i have since the day we met, i dunno, its like we constitly fight and make up, yet we cant seem to just let eachother go. the thing is, he can get any girl he wants...literally, hes the bad boy every girl wants, yet totally sweet and caring. its like i love his freedom, his crazyness, and when we r alone, he acts in a way i cant describe. there are so many girls who like him, yet he doesnt like any of them, he told his best friend that im the only thing on his mind. the problem: my parents. i seriously hate them sometimes, what is so wrong about dating a boy 2 years older than me, im sick and tired of lying just to be able to see him, its almost not worth it anymore. the fights it causes just make me too upset sometimes, that i wish i had never even looked his way that summer day. otherwise none of everything we have been through would have happened. now i met another boy, mike. he goes to schaumburg, hes a senior. cute, smart, and does wrestling cuz thats where i met him. i think my parents would totally love him. i dunno, i mean im kinda flattered that he was interested in me, and calls me just to talk, and wants to hang out. this is one boy that i could prolly bring home to mom. i really want to give him a chance, this could be the start of something new. the only problem is hes not brandon....
i dont know wat to do, i really like mike alot too
i hate this
it seems like no matter who i like, brandons always in the shadows..how do i make that go away?

blah, i just needed to get some random stuff out.. :/
<33Laur