When you are sitting there blathering about your problems to friends or loved ones, what is your intended mental and verbal response.....solution or identification
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I recognize your point, but you have to realize everyone deals with things differently. Not everyone can open themselves up to a point where someone can assess everything enough to make suggestions or to provide help. Sometimes all you can do is be like "dude that sucks, let me be there for you." Also, if you were to open yourself up that much to everyone, you'd be a bawling mess of nerves and emotion, and trust me, not everyone wants to solve your problems. Also, hell, I don't know about you but I don't know that many people that I feel are qualified or experienced enough to actually "help" me when I'm at my lowest point.
Anyway. Gotta play devil's advocate sometimes, Col. Personally, when I bitch online or in person it's more of a venting thing than a "please, help me" thing.
I guess I was generalizing a bit (one of my all time pet peeves). I just get frustrated because I'm a problem solver. And I'm also a very emotionally stimulated person. I'm not gonna cry when I'm watching "Chicago" or anything (haven't and don't want to see it). But when people I care about are in a tumultuous storm of emotional turmoil, I would like to see them out of that state. That's why I would do anything in my power to see that happen. But when people refuse that, it just angers me and I wish that they wouldn't bitch about it if they aren't going to do anything about it.
I may sound like I'm preaching from a tower but I'm really not. I've got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one.
Laughing hystericaly.... head back eyes closed and hand on belly.... I had a hard time keeping my lunch back too.... don't worry though- I think it's just the heat.
And to Col.... I agree with you- you don't invite people in unless you want some words of advice. Unless you're a whinny little bitch. Then you might expect the "that sucks" response. I know in my heart that if I were opening up that I would want just a little more that a wink and a "that sucks". And I think you're more like that too. Since you wrote about it on LJ and all- and look- no one wrote back saying: "Gee wiz Col- that sucks". *m*
What are you the shoe police now?irishfallJuly 22 2004, 14:33:07 UTC
I am, and you owe me twenty laps around the bar, let's go.
I generally don't bring my problems to anyone unless I need help solving them, and even then, it has to be a real "doozy" because I'll usually kill myself trying rather than burden someone else. That's why it's really frustrating when trivial matters are presented to me and I get bitched at when I try to help. Honestly, if you are my friend and you have problems, unless you want help solving those problems, don't tell me about them. It's hard enough going through this battle in my own head much less having to deal with a bunch of stupid shit.
Re: What are you the shoe police now?majijahJuly 22 2004, 19:19:04 UTC
Good I'm glad you're not speaking to me... actually I don't think we've aver been around eachother long enough to aven start talking about problems....
you're preaching to the choir about problems as a kid, sweetheart. we all have problems, it's the manner in which we deal with them that determines how effectively they get worked out.
Anyway. Gotta play devil's advocate sometimes, Col. Personally, when I bitch online or in person it's more of a venting thing than a "please, help me" thing.
- eb, the moodiest male alive
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I may sound like I'm preaching from a tower but I'm really not. I've got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one.
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Fine, don't believe me.
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Amen.
At least you know it.
=D 143
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Yet, you still decided to date me.
Must be slim pickings at OWU.
=P
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hey - I make do with what I got.
love you! =D
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and you ADORE ME. Damnit. Well - you DO.
psst - I'm kinda hooked on you too. You're like the bestest and stuff. And hawt.
Shall we keep cluttering up Collin's post and making him read all this? =D
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i love it.
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hahah, paaayyooowwwww 21!
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I had a hard time keeping my lunch back too.... don't worry though- I think it's just the heat.
And to Col....
I agree with you- you don't invite people in unless you want some words of advice. Unless you're a whinny little bitch. Then you might expect the "that sucks" response.
I know in my heart that if I were opening up that I would want just a little more that a wink and a "that sucks". And I think you're more like that too. Since you wrote about it on LJ and all- and look- no one wrote back saying:
"Gee wiz Col- that sucks".
*m*
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I generally don't bring my problems to anyone unless I need help solving them, and even then, it has to be a real "doozy" because I'll usually kill myself trying rather than burden someone else. That's why it's really frustrating when trivial matters are presented to me and I get bitched at when I try to help. Honestly, if you are my friend and you have problems, unless you want help solving those problems, don't tell me about them. It's hard enough going through this battle in my own head much less having to deal with a bunch of stupid shit.
(not meant to be spoken directly to you, Mariah)
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I had some probLEMS as a kid.
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:)
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