(no subject)
Ok so Hannah's last post sort of freaked me out but whatever..
Life is sure different since my last post.
I graduate in three months which is so soon - Its so hard to realize I will be fully done with school and in the real world..
My love life is so fucked up you don't even know. Last time i posted chris and I were together well he dumped me pretty hardcore - my heart was a little bit broken and my trust in guys is gone completely i now have the mentality that if i play them before they play me i am not the one getting hurt. Anyways he dumped me on new years and then sarah who i thought was one of my best friend and introduced him to me is now dating him and neither will talk to me, older is defiantly not always better! I have met a few boys who have sparked my interest my only problem is that they live in alberta!
My and tristan and tla went to mexico and had one hell of a time met some of the coolest people ever and did some crazy shit.
I am back in the hospital a few times a month which scares me and sucks to no end, i have drawn the line at what i believe to be unnecessary surgeries - they keep doing biopsy's and then not telling me what they are finding - i am still in pain and starting to hate my body. I don't think one should hate there body like i do i just cant help it! its really rough right now. i am trying my best to stay positive but i have no one to talk to about it and i mean besides my family i cant bring myself to admit to others that i am defeated and don't know how to fix it. i tell everyone i am ok and its no big deal but it think we all know thats not true anymore...
work sucks right now - everyone gossips and my boss fucking hates me. She is having a rough go right now too but not like i am and i am trying to be as empathic as possible but honestly i just want to tell her to get over it life could be worse..
Joy tried to kill herself again- almost succeeded this time too. she is awake no but was in a coma for 5 days and went into cardiac arrest, we aren't sure if she will be fine psychically but we just happy she is awake. Its hard i am trained in grief counseling for others but when its me and my own family i just don't know how to react.
Lastly my best friend is pregnant i am not going to say who because she doesn't want people to know. I am going to go see her soon - its hard when friends move away and then need support. i would be there in a heart beat if i could but it requires time off and money... the two things i don't have.
Thats life...
Life is sure different since my last post.
I graduate in three months which is so soon - Its so hard to realize I will be fully done with school and in the real world..
My love life is so fucked up you don't even know. Last time i posted chris and I were together well he dumped me pretty hardcore - my heart was a little bit broken and my trust in guys is gone completely i now have the mentality that if i play them before they play me i am not the one getting hurt. Anyways he dumped me on new years and then sarah who i thought was one of my best friend and introduced him to me is now dating him and neither will talk to me, older is defiantly not always better! I have met a few boys who have sparked my interest my only problem is that they live in alberta!
My and tristan and tla went to mexico and had one hell of a time met some of the coolest people ever and did some crazy shit.
I am back in the hospital a few times a month which scares me and sucks to no end, i have drawn the line at what i believe to be unnecessary surgeries - they keep doing biopsy's and then not telling me what they are finding - i am still in pain and starting to hate my body. I don't think one should hate there body like i do i just cant help it! its really rough right now. i am trying my best to stay positive but i have no one to talk to about it and i mean besides my family i cant bring myself to admit to others that i am defeated and don't know how to fix it. i tell everyone i am ok and its no big deal but it think we all know thats not true anymore...
work sucks right now - everyone gossips and my boss fucking hates me. She is having a rough go right now too but not like i am and i am trying to be as empathic as possible but honestly i just want to tell her to get over it life could be worse..
Joy tried to kill herself again- almost succeeded this time too. she is awake no but was in a coma for 5 days and went into cardiac arrest, we aren't sure if she will be fine psychically but we just happy she is awake. Its hard i am trained in grief counseling for others but when its me and my own family i just don't know how to react.
Lastly my best friend is pregnant i am not going to say who because she doesn't want people to know. I am going to go see her soon - its hard when friends move away and then need support. i would be there in a heart beat if i could but it requires time off and money... the two things i don't have.
Thats life...