(no subject)
I have hardly anything to say here, since the only person I'm publicly writing to (being Lauren) I don't care to speak to, or have anything to do with. I'll end this here, since I have to go change my locks. Pari and Leah might come and kick my ass while Trevor's not home. (Though, according to Lauren, he's just my little bitch anyway, so I don't know why he would be away from me for more than two seconds.)
Do not call my phone again screaming, Lauren. I will hang up the instant I hear your voice. You want to yell, tell me how I'm so retarded, how the reason you didn't do good in school is because you were busy being a cheerleader, so I should be graduated right now, since I'm nothing anyway... The difference between you and I, dear Lauren, is that you pass judgements and that's how you make friends. Judging people is cool to you, it's what you do. I don't judge people. You claim that I do, but I don't. See, I know the types of people that judge others, and I do not hang out with them. I have nothing to do with them. I say the things I say about you because that is how you portray yourself to others. It's not judgement, it's describing the personality you give off. Excuse me if in retrospect, you don't think highly of yourself.
And as for your problems? You asked me not to bring them up, so I won't. That's all I wanted was for you to ask me nicely (even though you didn't, so I'm not quite sure why I'm doing this anyway).
You won't listen to me on the phone, so I guess I have to write it all down for you to read. You tell me I'm a hypocrite, that I say one thing, and do the exact opposite. Which, by the way, I must have learned from you. "Don't call me stupid!" turned into "And you are SO retarded." Lauren, you say you didn't do as good in school as I do because you had extracurriculars. I'm sorry, managing a household, a relationship, working almost full time and being a full-time student aren't "technically" extra curriculars, so I guess you have every right to discredit my 3.923 GPA (of out of 4.0). Taking honors classes. That's all sarcasm, by the way.
Lauren, you don't know me. You have never known me, and you've never taken the chance to get to know me. I am sick to death of trying to get along with you when I am the only one doing it. I'm not going to run or hide from you, because your threats of having your friends come beat me up aren't really as terrifying as you thought they would be. I am not going to not come over to your house because you're there. Guess what? I don't care. Your family, as much as you may hate it, is now a part of my family. GET OVER IT. The sooner you grow up and realize that you aren't doing anyone any good by keeping up your spiteful antics (including yourself), the happier everyone will be.
You are just plain silly if you think I hate you. I seriously dislike you, sure. I absolutely hate the way you treat me, and I LOATHE the way you treat your brother. You once told me on the phone, crying something hysterical, "And I know Trevor and I don't get along, but he's my brother and I love him!"
If you loved him so much, you wouldn't insult him the way you do. If you honestly loved your brother, you wouldn't treat me the way you do. Your brother loves me very much. I am not just going to up and disappear. If you loved your brother the way you say you do, you wouldn't act the way you do. If you cared about other members of your family, you would stop with your childish antics.
Before I close, I will say this. If, miraculously, for some reason, you are as sick of the arguments, the stealing, and the general fake niceness between us as I am, I would very much so appreciate it if you would let me know. Because I am tired of not getting along with you. I hate that the thought of you stresses me out, because I hate dealing with you in our general every day life. And I hate that it feels like I am the only person trying. Let me know if you've tried. If you're thinking about trying. If you want for us to get along, please, by all means, let me know. Because it would save other people in our lives, and ourselves, a hell of a lot of misery. I have had it with "putting up" with you. I'm finished. From here on out, I am treating you the way you treat me. If you call me a name, I will call you one. If you steal something of mine, I will steal something of yours. If you call my phone and generally harrass me, I will do the same to you.
On the other hand, if you would like to call me and apologize, I will apologize to you. If you would like to stop being fake nice to me, I will stop being fake nice to you.
For everyone to see, Lauren, I am hearby ready and willing to wipe the slate clean. I will forgive you all that you've ever called me, said to me, stolen from me, etc. if you will swallow your pride and apologize. If there is something I've done to you, I will apologize for it. But I'm finished. I will be eighteen in exactly one week. You will be eighteen in two months. Between us, there is alot of growing up to do. And by treating me the way you do, you're missing out on an incredibly valuable friend and ally. Even today on the phone, I told you I would help you if you asked me. I meant it.
For everyone to see, Lauren, the choice here is yours. You feel that I've wronged you? Well, guess what - you've more than wronged me. But from here on out, for the rest of our lives, I am treating you as you treat me. So go ahead. Call me names, threaten me, be my best friend, whatever. But I've absolutely had it with this bullshit.
If you call, I will answer. If you scream, I will hang up. All I want to hear from you is a way that you think we can co-exist peacefully. And that is absolutely all I have to say to you.
Do not call my phone again screaming, Lauren. I will hang up the instant I hear your voice. You want to yell, tell me how I'm so retarded, how the reason you didn't do good in school is because you were busy being a cheerleader, so I should be graduated right now, since I'm nothing anyway... The difference between you and I, dear Lauren, is that you pass judgements and that's how you make friends. Judging people is cool to you, it's what you do. I don't judge people. You claim that I do, but I don't. See, I know the types of people that judge others, and I do not hang out with them. I have nothing to do with them. I say the things I say about you because that is how you portray yourself to others. It's not judgement, it's describing the personality you give off. Excuse me if in retrospect, you don't think highly of yourself.
And as for your problems? You asked me not to bring them up, so I won't. That's all I wanted was for you to ask me nicely (even though you didn't, so I'm not quite sure why I'm doing this anyway).
You won't listen to me on the phone, so I guess I have to write it all down for you to read. You tell me I'm a hypocrite, that I say one thing, and do the exact opposite. Which, by the way, I must have learned from you. "Don't call me stupid!" turned into "And you are SO retarded." Lauren, you say you didn't do as good in school as I do because you had extracurriculars. I'm sorry, managing a household, a relationship, working almost full time and being a full-time student aren't "technically" extra curriculars, so I guess you have every right to discredit my 3.923 GPA (of out of 4.0). Taking honors classes. That's all sarcasm, by the way.
Lauren, you don't know me. You have never known me, and you've never taken the chance to get to know me. I am sick to death of trying to get along with you when I am the only one doing it. I'm not going to run or hide from you, because your threats of having your friends come beat me up aren't really as terrifying as you thought they would be. I am not going to not come over to your house because you're there. Guess what? I don't care. Your family, as much as you may hate it, is now a part of my family. GET OVER IT. The sooner you grow up and realize that you aren't doing anyone any good by keeping up your spiteful antics (including yourself), the happier everyone will be.
You are just plain silly if you think I hate you. I seriously dislike you, sure. I absolutely hate the way you treat me, and I LOATHE the way you treat your brother. You once told me on the phone, crying something hysterical, "And I know Trevor and I don't get along, but he's my brother and I love him!"
If you loved him so much, you wouldn't insult him the way you do. If you honestly loved your brother, you wouldn't treat me the way you do. Your brother loves me very much. I am not just going to up and disappear. If you loved your brother the way you say you do, you wouldn't act the way you do. If you cared about other members of your family, you would stop with your childish antics.
Before I close, I will say this. If, miraculously, for some reason, you are as sick of the arguments, the stealing, and the general fake niceness between us as I am, I would very much so appreciate it if you would let me know. Because I am tired of not getting along with you. I hate that the thought of you stresses me out, because I hate dealing with you in our general every day life. And I hate that it feels like I am the only person trying. Let me know if you've tried. If you're thinking about trying. If you want for us to get along, please, by all means, let me know. Because it would save other people in our lives, and ourselves, a hell of a lot of misery. I have had it with "putting up" with you. I'm finished. From here on out, I am treating you the way you treat me. If you call me a name, I will call you one. If you steal something of mine, I will steal something of yours. If you call my phone and generally harrass me, I will do the same to you.
On the other hand, if you would like to call me and apologize, I will apologize to you. If you would like to stop being fake nice to me, I will stop being fake nice to you.
For everyone to see, Lauren, I am hearby ready and willing to wipe the slate clean. I will forgive you all that you've ever called me, said to me, stolen from me, etc. if you will swallow your pride and apologize. If there is something I've done to you, I will apologize for it. But I'm finished. I will be eighteen in exactly one week. You will be eighteen in two months. Between us, there is alot of growing up to do. And by treating me the way you do, you're missing out on an incredibly valuable friend and ally. Even today on the phone, I told you I would help you if you asked me. I meant it.
For everyone to see, Lauren, the choice here is yours. You feel that I've wronged you? Well, guess what - you've more than wronged me. But from here on out, for the rest of our lives, I am treating you as you treat me. So go ahead. Call me names, threaten me, be my best friend, whatever. But I've absolutely had it with this bullshit.
If you call, I will answer. If you scream, I will hang up. All I want to hear from you is a way that you think we can co-exist peacefully. And that is absolutely all I have to say to you.