Coming back to LiveJournal
I've been putting a lot of thought into getting involved the
LiveJournal world again. A lot of the reason I switched to Xanga is
because I get annoyed with the way LiveJournal works. But I'm going to
come back again--at least for awhile, for a couple of reasons. 1) I've
been missing some of my friends that only use LJ. 2) I have some things
I need to get out, and Xanga is not the place to do it. I've been
thinking through a lot of things and learning a lot, and I feel the
need to express it, but I don't feel like it would be wise to be that
open on Xanga since so many people access my Xanga blog. So anyway,
just to let you know what's going on....
Most likely I will protect my posts here and make them friends only. If you want to read my posts, you're going to have to respond to this post. Anyone who doesn't respond will be removed from my friends list.
And just so you're prepared for what's coming, I really do plan on using my LJ as a place to bare my soul, to some extent. I feel like there are some things I need to sort out and won't be able to unless I share them. So bear with me, please. I'm really not looking for your criticism. I'm going to be transparent here. I want to make sure everyone knows a lot of the things I want to say are things I'm still sorting out myself, and I don't claim to necessarily be right. I just want to try to sort through some of my confusion by writing it out. I do welcome your input, though.
The main thing I want to talk about is the issue of love. I turn 23 tomorrow (happy birthday to me!) and, to be perfectly honest, I never thought I would still be single at 23. In some ways I am at peace with it. I know God is doing the best for me. But at the same time, I'm lonely. And it hurts to see friends all around me, most of them younger than I, getting together and getting married. There are all kinds of emotions that well up inside of me. And because of my nature, I have to get them out. That's what I want to do here. I have so many questions about love, and I want to understand as much as I can. Some of the questions I have I want to discuss on here the next few posts, such as:
-How do I reconcile being satisfied in God and yet anticipating "fulfillment" in a mate? Is it possible to long for and miss someone I don't know and yet still see God as the Lover of my soul?
-How do I have a realistic and yet romantic view of love? When I hear married people continually tell me "marriage is not all its cracked up to be" am I supposed to just accept that? Or is there really a way to be in love for a lifetime? How can I be determined to stay in love and yet have a realistic expectation of the trials that are part of every relationship?
-What's with all these people that seem like they get into a relationship just to have someone? How do I really feel about getting married because I'm "in love with love" vs. getting married because I find someone I "can't live without."
-Is love paradoxical? It seems that love hurts so bad, yet in the midst of all the hurt is also healing. How will I have the courage to take a risk, to lay my heart on the line, and to pledge my entire life to someone?
So that's what this journal is going to be--at least for awhile. Hopefully in talking out my confused thoughts I'll find the clarity I'm looking for.
Keep on running,
Farther, faster
Keep on searching,
For this haunting has an answer.
Most likely I will protect my posts here and make them friends only. If you want to read my posts, you're going to have to respond to this post. Anyone who doesn't respond will be removed from my friends list.
And just so you're prepared for what's coming, I really do plan on using my LJ as a place to bare my soul, to some extent. I feel like there are some things I need to sort out and won't be able to unless I share them. So bear with me, please. I'm really not looking for your criticism. I'm going to be transparent here. I want to make sure everyone knows a lot of the things I want to say are things I'm still sorting out myself, and I don't claim to necessarily be right. I just want to try to sort through some of my confusion by writing it out. I do welcome your input, though.
The main thing I want to talk about is the issue of love. I turn 23 tomorrow (happy birthday to me!) and, to be perfectly honest, I never thought I would still be single at 23. In some ways I am at peace with it. I know God is doing the best for me. But at the same time, I'm lonely. And it hurts to see friends all around me, most of them younger than I, getting together and getting married. There are all kinds of emotions that well up inside of me. And because of my nature, I have to get them out. That's what I want to do here. I have so many questions about love, and I want to understand as much as I can. Some of the questions I have I want to discuss on here the next few posts, such as:
-How do I reconcile being satisfied in God and yet anticipating "fulfillment" in a mate? Is it possible to long for and miss someone I don't know and yet still see God as the Lover of my soul?
-How do I have a realistic and yet romantic view of love? When I hear married people continually tell me "marriage is not all its cracked up to be" am I supposed to just accept that? Or is there really a way to be in love for a lifetime? How can I be determined to stay in love and yet have a realistic expectation of the trials that are part of every relationship?
-What's with all these people that seem like they get into a relationship just to have someone? How do I really feel about getting married because I'm "in love with love" vs. getting married because I find someone I "can't live without."
-Is love paradoxical? It seems that love hurts so bad, yet in the midst of all the hurt is also healing. How will I have the courage to take a risk, to lay my heart on the line, and to pledge my entire life to someone?
So that's what this journal is going to be--at least for awhile. Hopefully in talking out my confused thoughts I'll find the clarity I'm looking for.
Keep on running,
Farther, faster
Keep on searching,
For this haunting has an answer.