snow
Well this weekend isn't looking very promising for the things I acctualy want to get done. Oh well guess I will just hang out at home and do some laundry and stuff. Maybee do some lacing and fixing and stuff on my moccasins and other buckskinn things. Listening to msi. God such lovely music. Sooner or later I will have to take down my big mirror. and try to take that over to my new place. Hopefully I won't brake it again like I did last time.
So this person wrote me on myspace a couple of days ago. Very simple message just how you doing we havn't talked in a while. The profile is private but it looks like my ex kelsey. If it is it brings a lot of questions to my mind that probably won't ever be answered but I can't help it I am a curious man. dame curiosity. Why does she keep at intervals looking me up. I can't say that I dislike it. Mostly she just says hi and dissapears again. I do like remembering all the good times we had. Those are plesent things in a lonely time.
I never knew how much some people didn't like her untill lately. Wow. Thinking about it though there are plenty of my exes that my friends didn't like for one reason or another. Strange.
kelsey is the one who introduced me to msi. I am verry happy she did.
So many old memories of plesent times. Also gets me thinking of all the things all the people all the times. Thinking back can be painfull or can be pleasent. sometimes its a bit of both.
MMM wish I could be keeping busiy with my mind on blacksmithing but with all this snow out on the ground again when I woke up this morning it doesn't look like I will be able to do anything with that for a while. So my efforts have to switch over to something else. But nothing quite keeps my mind off of things like the lonely nights like the blacksmithing and feeling accomplished.
I reasearched rabbit stick and winter court yesterday. I so want to go. Lovely week long of classes about all the things I have been striving all by myself to learn. I could come away from that with so much. I have to try and see if in the future at some time I might be in the position to go to eather one of those places.
Its so much harder trying to do things by yourself. I just seem to find myself in that situation all the time.
I haven't seen andy/aka roomy in like a week or more. I think he slept here one night. maybee. I can only guess cus I think his bathroom stuff was here for one night.
Seems the only one I see anymore is rachelle.
hmmm kinda miss my friends. But they are all busy. I wonder how much I dissapear when I have a woman to spend time with?
I can't wait to spend as much time outside doing things this summer as possible.
I plan on working on my fire by friction skills and so many others. I realize that in the little no mans land I can make a debre hut. Good practice. I think I will do that this summer and see how that works out for me. I really need to move in diffinitive steps twords the abilitys I want to have. Not that they may wind up getting me anywhere in life. I just deep down need to be able to do these things. They make me happy. Yet I always feel so stuped when I fail. God I hate that feeling like eather I or others hold me up to being to good at things that take so much time to be even decent at.
alright I will admit it I have no idea where my life is going. I don't know what kind of mess my personall life is in cus I just keep trying to find ways to ignore it or forget about it. Shure it has been a little easyer to be friendly and not quite so shy because of my job and having to talk with people and I think that has helped a little bit. I hate being all shy but I don't really have the knowledge about what most humans are interested in. I have my own set of knowledge and it doesn't really overlap any of the people that I meet.
I have been drawing mostly things to make in blacksmithing lately. I should draw something like humans again. I love drawing humans. Still have all my drawings of people I think those are my favorate to draw. I love it when people let me draw them. One good thing about having someone around you can just sit there and draw them.
I wonder if she will respond to my response or just dissapear again leaving me to wonder so much about her motivation and what after all these years she is. I know just asking for trouble but no matter what has happend or will I have and always will love sertin people. I wish I didn't. I wish those feelings would just go away but they won't. But thats the problem people change and things happen. and your left with those feelings. Oh well time to think about other stuff.
ummm oh yeah I gotta go grocery shopping. do laundry..... pick up my room and vacume. ...hmmm what else can I find to do besides babble on here cus I am lonely and tired and want to be blacksmithing so I feel accomplished and forget about my lonelyness and these weard stuped pains that I keep getting.......I so wanna practice my fire by friction.........soon will have a backyard for that.....I should eat breakfast..hmmm think I will go do that and stop thinking yeha thats a good Idea think the best I have had in a long time.
So this person wrote me on myspace a couple of days ago. Very simple message just how you doing we havn't talked in a while. The profile is private but it looks like my ex kelsey. If it is it brings a lot of questions to my mind that probably won't ever be answered but I can't help it I am a curious man. dame curiosity. Why does she keep at intervals looking me up. I can't say that I dislike it. Mostly she just says hi and dissapears again. I do like remembering all the good times we had. Those are plesent things in a lonely time.
I never knew how much some people didn't like her untill lately. Wow. Thinking about it though there are plenty of my exes that my friends didn't like for one reason or another. Strange.
kelsey is the one who introduced me to msi. I am verry happy she did.
So many old memories of plesent times. Also gets me thinking of all the things all the people all the times. Thinking back can be painfull or can be pleasent. sometimes its a bit of both.
MMM wish I could be keeping busiy with my mind on blacksmithing but with all this snow out on the ground again when I woke up this morning it doesn't look like I will be able to do anything with that for a while. So my efforts have to switch over to something else. But nothing quite keeps my mind off of things like the lonely nights like the blacksmithing and feeling accomplished.
I reasearched rabbit stick and winter court yesterday. I so want to go. Lovely week long of classes about all the things I have been striving all by myself to learn. I could come away from that with so much. I have to try and see if in the future at some time I might be in the position to go to eather one of those places.
Its so much harder trying to do things by yourself. I just seem to find myself in that situation all the time.
I haven't seen andy/aka roomy in like a week or more. I think he slept here one night. maybee. I can only guess cus I think his bathroom stuff was here for one night.
Seems the only one I see anymore is rachelle.
hmmm kinda miss my friends. But they are all busy. I wonder how much I dissapear when I have a woman to spend time with?
I can't wait to spend as much time outside doing things this summer as possible.
I plan on working on my fire by friction skills and so many others. I realize that in the little no mans land I can make a debre hut. Good practice. I think I will do that this summer and see how that works out for me. I really need to move in diffinitive steps twords the abilitys I want to have. Not that they may wind up getting me anywhere in life. I just deep down need to be able to do these things. They make me happy. Yet I always feel so stuped when I fail. God I hate that feeling like eather I or others hold me up to being to good at things that take so much time to be even decent at.
alright I will admit it I have no idea where my life is going. I don't know what kind of mess my personall life is in cus I just keep trying to find ways to ignore it or forget about it. Shure it has been a little easyer to be friendly and not quite so shy because of my job and having to talk with people and I think that has helped a little bit. I hate being all shy but I don't really have the knowledge about what most humans are interested in. I have my own set of knowledge and it doesn't really overlap any of the people that I meet.
I have been drawing mostly things to make in blacksmithing lately. I should draw something like humans again. I love drawing humans. Still have all my drawings of people I think those are my favorate to draw. I love it when people let me draw them. One good thing about having someone around you can just sit there and draw them.
I wonder if she will respond to my response or just dissapear again leaving me to wonder so much about her motivation and what after all these years she is. I know just asking for trouble but no matter what has happend or will I have and always will love sertin people. I wish I didn't. I wish those feelings would just go away but they won't. But thats the problem people change and things happen. and your left with those feelings. Oh well time to think about other stuff.
ummm oh yeah I gotta go grocery shopping. do laundry..... pick up my room and vacume. ...hmmm what else can I find to do besides babble on here cus I am lonely and tired and want to be blacksmithing so I feel accomplished and forget about my lonelyness and these weard stuped pains that I keep getting.......I so wanna practice my fire by friction.........soon will have a backyard for that.....I should eat breakfast..hmmm think I will go do that and stop thinking yeha thats a good Idea think the best I have had in a long time.