(no subject)
I just miss her so much. My friend died last month. She was the one who I could tell everything to. I never realized how much I saved up to tell her. Now every day I realize that she won't be there to tell. Most days I do ok, I realize how lucky I was to have her in the first place. I have experienced a lot of loss in my life, a lot. Enough to know that you can get lost for years in grief. I have done this so many different ways. This time we made sure that everything was said. This time I refused to let myself get swallowed by the grief. I get up and go everyday. But all my experience, all my so called maturity, everything that has been keeping me sane, all of it, ...doesn't change the fact that I just miss her so much.