I'll be right there, the buzz inside your head, the hum of eletric chairs
I've noticed I'm only really comfortable showing two emotions in public (public, as defined by me is more than 2 people, there is more to it than that but I doubt you could care less about the details) and those are impish, and somber. That's not to say I don't show other emotions in public, it's just to say I usually don't intend to. It's strange; I feel I should hide that information. Like if people knew that they would try to get me to do more than that. But I know they wouldn't. It's simple really. I can say things like this because they have no power. I already know what I do wrong and that isn't going to be changed. Admitting it isn't going to revolutionize my life, it's just gonna be out there on paper (so to speak). I think the real reason I am safe from external changes is I'm peripheral. I'm there mind you, but just on the outside of vision and hearing. Like an gnat, only much larger. If my world would turn just a bit then I would centre in someone's vision, which may be what I want. It's hard to say, I'm sure if I was someone or something's most important whatever, you'd hear me crack under it. This is getting harder to say, I think i'm breaking into the realm of things that could be used against me, although I know not by whom. Maybe that is how you break into centre focus so to speak. I should trash this, it's just me buzzing anyway.