1234 tell me that you love me more.
So here's something that scared me a moment ago: I fear being the girl with a journal that some other girl reads in the future before becoming nauseated and ceasing her history-delving forever. In fact, I fear it enough to not even want to update...but fear is the path to the dark side, and I shall not let it prevail over me. Besides, my memories are worth something regardless.
This past weekend I visited Brendan in Columbia, SC for the third time I believe. I drove down Friday afternoon after a particularly crazy and maybe stressful day at the office/post office, and despite my best efforts I was unable to bring him his record shelves! Bah! Anyways, that night we ate dinner at his favorite place, Hunter (&?) Gatherer, with a couple of his classmates and then watched Happy Feet. It was cute. The Mexican penguins were by far my favorite. On Saturday we did a bunch of whatever we wanted - no, that's not what I meant, perverts. I mean chillaxing. We walked around Five Points and ate at Al Amir for dinner - an EXCELLENT suggestion - and I had filaffle(sp?)! Then we watched Samurai Champloo until we couldn't anymore...6 episodes later it was bedtime. Sunday we ate brunch with more friends, took a walk through a state park, got some Ben & Jerry's deliciousness, read at Starbucks and then cooked rotten pork until Brendan tasted and realized it was unedible, at which point we had bratwurst and rice and beans instead. The evening was sealed with Dead Silence, the weird movie about a creepy old ventriloquist woman. It was decent for it's genera. In summary: I had a great weekend and I don't want to forget it.
So Brendan and I were packing up to leave the Bucks when this guy walked in who caught everyone's attention. He was a little too skinny and unclean to be a "normal" person, and his speech was choppy, broken and nervous. He walked up to some employees, and my best guess is that he asked to talk to a managerial-type person. One of the girls working there had been talking to Brendan about music moments before and was still standing nearby, so when they pointed what was obviously a homeless guy in her direction, she freaked out to us for a moment before talking to him. He told her that his $45 paycheck wouldn't be given to him until Monday, but he was wondering if he could have a drink "with just some milk and expresso" that night and then he would come and pay for it later. He was very polite and presented his case clearly, but the girl was obviously very uncomfortable. She sent him up to the counter anyways, and Brendan, who had been watching intently the whole time, followed. With the beggar gone, the girl turned to me and, with lowered voice, said "There's no way I would give him a drink!" Meanwhile, Brendan was at the register buying the guy whatever it was he wanted to order, and the nasty moral dilemma posed upon the staff of Starbucks was solved and the guy behind the counter was able to mix the drink without problem. Here's why I care about this story: not a single person in that entire building - including me - thought to just buy the guy a drink except Brendan. The Starbucks girl was horrified by the idea of charity, and the rest of the staff was like "uggg?" and the customers were probably just glad not to have to deal with the problem. I am horrified with the selfishness of the human race in general (and I include myself in that statement), but at the same time I was SO touched by the shockingly obvious yet compassionate action of my boyfriend that I was nearly moved to tears. I don't mean to be a page out of "Chicken Soup for the Soul", but I don't think I've seen anything like that happen in real life before, and the overwhelming pride and clarity felt afterwards made it something I couldn't not preserve in cyberspace. (Pride for knowing and being with such a pure creature, and clarity for the glaring reminder of what "humanity" supposedly is.) Anyways...I have another notch now in my very very long list for being completely submerged and yet still breathing in feelings for Brendan.
You know what I hate? The downplay of my situation as something that everyone else has already done, been to and used the t-shirt to wash their car with. I might hate it for the truth, or I might hate it for the very opposite. I still cling to the hope that I'm not as broken as everyone else in our capacity to create something worth living for. Well, obviously, since I haven't offed myself.
There's tons more worth updating about, but it's 12:36 am and I have to be at work at 8:30 tomorrow morning. Wooooo-nelly!
This past weekend I visited Brendan in Columbia, SC for the third time I believe. I drove down Friday afternoon after a particularly crazy and maybe stressful day at the office/post office, and despite my best efforts I was unable to bring him his record shelves! Bah! Anyways, that night we ate dinner at his favorite place, Hunter (&?) Gatherer, with a couple of his classmates and then watched Happy Feet. It was cute. The Mexican penguins were by far my favorite. On Saturday we did a bunch of whatever we wanted - no, that's not what I meant, perverts. I mean chillaxing. We walked around Five Points and ate at Al Amir for dinner - an EXCELLENT suggestion - and I had filaffle(sp?)! Then we watched Samurai Champloo until we couldn't anymore...6 episodes later it was bedtime. Sunday we ate brunch with more friends, took a walk through a state park, got some Ben & Jerry's deliciousness, read at Starbucks and then cooked rotten pork until Brendan tasted and realized it was unedible, at which point we had bratwurst and rice and beans instead. The evening was sealed with Dead Silence, the weird movie about a creepy old ventriloquist woman. It was decent for it's genera. In summary: I had a great weekend and I don't want to forget it.
So Brendan and I were packing up to leave the Bucks when this guy walked in who caught everyone's attention. He was a little too skinny and unclean to be a "normal" person, and his speech was choppy, broken and nervous. He walked up to some employees, and my best guess is that he asked to talk to a managerial-type person. One of the girls working there had been talking to Brendan about music moments before and was still standing nearby, so when they pointed what was obviously a homeless guy in her direction, she freaked out to us for a moment before talking to him. He told her that his $45 paycheck wouldn't be given to him until Monday, but he was wondering if he could have a drink "with just some milk and expresso" that night and then he would come and pay for it later. He was very polite and presented his case clearly, but the girl was obviously very uncomfortable. She sent him up to the counter anyways, and Brendan, who had been watching intently the whole time, followed. With the beggar gone, the girl turned to me and, with lowered voice, said "There's no way I would give him a drink!" Meanwhile, Brendan was at the register buying the guy whatever it was he wanted to order, and the nasty moral dilemma posed upon the staff of Starbucks was solved and the guy behind the counter was able to mix the drink without problem. Here's why I care about this story: not a single person in that entire building - including me - thought to just buy the guy a drink except Brendan. The Starbucks girl was horrified by the idea of charity, and the rest of the staff was like "uggg?" and the customers were probably just glad not to have to deal with the problem. I am horrified with the selfishness of the human race in general (and I include myself in that statement), but at the same time I was SO touched by the shockingly obvious yet compassionate action of my boyfriend that I was nearly moved to tears. I don't mean to be a page out of "Chicken Soup for the Soul", but I don't think I've seen anything like that happen in real life before, and the overwhelming pride and clarity felt afterwards made it something I couldn't not preserve in cyberspace. (Pride for knowing and being with such a pure creature, and clarity for the glaring reminder of what "humanity" supposedly is.) Anyways...I have another notch now in my very very long list for being completely submerged and yet still breathing in feelings for Brendan.
You know what I hate? The downplay of my situation as something that everyone else has already done, been to and used the t-shirt to wash their car with. I might hate it for the truth, or I might hate it for the very opposite. I still cling to the hope that I'm not as broken as everyone else in our capacity to create something worth living for. Well, obviously, since I haven't offed myself.
There's tons more worth updating about, but it's 12:36 am and I have to be at work at 8:30 tomorrow morning. Wooooo-nelly!