(no subject)
I find it hard to think about the difficult things in life, and pretend like my life is perfect everyday. I don't know if it is because of the way I was raised, or maybe that I have some sort of naive innocence, but horrible things happen in our world everyday, and when I think about that, I become horribly upset. I live a great life with a great family, and a great boyfriend, and every opportunity I could ever ask for...but when I think about things that horrible people in this world do, and horrible things that just happen, it makes me feel guilty for the life I live. The thought of anyone loosing the person they love hurts me. Thinking about young girls, and woman who lose their soul-mates to war and hate makes me feel selfish for not waking up everyday holding on to the man I love.
The worst fight my boyfriend Ted and I have ever been in was over 9/11. He likes to believe in conspiracies, and I guess he is what you would call a conspiracy theorist, but normally that doesn't bother me anymore than me just laughing it off cause I think it's weird. But the thought of the person I love actually believing that our own people would plan something as horrible as that makes me sick. I don't know why, but the argument we had made me sick, physically sick. I couldn't stand to hear him talking about how metal doesn't melt that way, and how bombs had to have been in the building, and how our government knew about it....I feel sick now. I can't even being to understand how people could begin to do such horrible things, and it made me ill to think someone I love believed that people could do something like that so nonchalantly.
I guess I'm naive, and I feel dumb for the way I feel about things, but I just want to believe that people aren't as horrible as everyone makes it seem. And I want to believe that things don't have to be so hard for everyone. Why are people starving to death when all of the world could unite and use our resources to save others. Is it religion that is so important? Why? His book says something different than hers.... get over it. I'm tired of hearing religion and race being used as an excuse for horrible things that go on everyday in our world. I'm tired of horrible things happening. I'm sad that I lead a "normal" life, when I'm sure there are so many other people out there who deserve it more than I.
I just wish the world weren't so sad. Is that too much to ask?
The worst fight my boyfriend Ted and I have ever been in was over 9/11. He likes to believe in conspiracies, and I guess he is what you would call a conspiracy theorist, but normally that doesn't bother me anymore than me just laughing it off cause I think it's weird. But the thought of the person I love actually believing that our own people would plan something as horrible as that makes me sick. I don't know why, but the argument we had made me sick, physically sick. I couldn't stand to hear him talking about how metal doesn't melt that way, and how bombs had to have been in the building, and how our government knew about it....I feel sick now. I can't even being to understand how people could begin to do such horrible things, and it made me ill to think someone I love believed that people could do something like that so nonchalantly.
I guess I'm naive, and I feel dumb for the way I feel about things, but I just want to believe that people aren't as horrible as everyone makes it seem. And I want to believe that things don't have to be so hard for everyone. Why are people starving to death when all of the world could unite and use our resources to save others. Is it religion that is so important? Why? His book says something different than hers.... get over it. I'm tired of hearing religion and race being used as an excuse for horrible things that go on everyday in our world. I'm tired of horrible things happening. I'm sad that I lead a "normal" life, when I'm sure there are so many other people out there who deserve it more than I.
I just wish the world weren't so sad. Is that too much to ask?