quintessential things
bigs words
So this weekend I /was/ going to go to my cottage, but instead my dad had to show students the house so we can't go.
Today I was asked at work if I could work the night shift saturday. That's 4pm-12am. At first I said no, but you know what? I fucking knew that I would be doing nothing but sitting on my ass at home alone on Saturday night. So instead now I fucking have to go to work all night tomorrow. And I blame everyone but myself.
In other news I'm not impressed with this summer at all. I want to go back to school now, back to rez where me and my friends (all 3 of us) hung out all the fucking time and I was only not doing stuff when I didn't want to. I have no fun here. I have no fun anywhere. The point of weekends is not to friggen sit in someones basement and watch fucking movies. I want to go somewhere or do something.
Now instead of doing anything tonight I'll be sitting on my ass reading something or other. And whilst I devour another book (Blood Canticle right now) I will hate everyone who I think is having fun without me. I'm not even in the mood to do anything because I know nothings happening. I'm so not impressed with everything. I feel pissed off at everyone. Why don't you fuckers get a life, and when you figure out something to do give me a call and I'll come along for the ride. Until then you can all have fun doing nothing and fuck off.
I wonder what I'll be doing two weekends from now (a nice long one). Probably go up to my cottage by myself where I know no one, go buy some old books from "Stuff" and read all day and night. I hope you all enjoy whatever fucking holiday that is, all have fun with your friends hanging out by a fire or something because god forbide I be around or welcomed at someones shindig. I must be quite the party pooper. It's a shame Misa's gone for the whole summer, he likes to do random things and invites me along with his friends.
A parting note to myself: there's a reason party poopers aren't invited places. stay cool dude
P.S. Lucky, you're still in my heart. I can't stand my lonely life without you. I love you, miss you, will never share such a bond for the rest of my life. Nothing has ever fazed me so much before. I'd do anything to bring you back.