Nicked from 303factory
1.YOUR ZODIAC SIGN?
gemini. I think that means I'm predisposed to Drug addiction, bi-polar and scizooid behaviour, but you'd better ask my doctor, Don't now much about astrology.
2. SINGLE OR TAKEN?
why do these questions always have to be so complicated to answer?
3. IF TAKEN, BY WHO?
some Puertorican guy. No. OJ. OJ took it.
4. HAVE U EVER BEEN SERiOUSLY HURT BY THE PERSON YOU LOVE/D?
Yes. It felt good.
5. WHAT WOULD BE YOUR REASON iF YOU TURNED SUiCiDAL?
Or DEATH, I guess.
6. iS SUiCiDE REALLY KiLLiNG YOURSELF?
No. Its like playing pat-a-cakes with Rippy the Razor. Remember Kids: Its down the road, not accross the street.
Incidentally,
6. DO YOU LiKE ChEESE?
Yes. Thanks for asking.
7. PREFER COUNTRY OR CLASSiCAL?
Well, the "DEATH COUNTRY " version of "Highway to Hell" that was played to me some while ago DID something for me- maybe to do with hearing what sounded like a distorted electric banjo howling out notes.
But still, THE TERROR.
Gotta be classical all the way, I'm affraid. I actually *LIKE* the stuff.
8. PREFER CUTE/iDiOT OR SMART/UGLY?
cute/idiot sounds good. At least that way, I'd only have to worry about not bein' as really, really, really good looking as them. better than bein' outclassed across the board.
9. ARE YOU iN A STABLE RELATiONSHiP WiTH YOUR BF/GF/CRUSH?
Not sure whether to call it stable.
10. YOU'D EXPECT A TEXT MESSAGE USUALLY FROM:
People I owe money.
11. HAVE A BEST FRiEND THAT iS iN THE OPPOSiTE GENDER?
What do you mean, *IN* the opposite gender? I Guess so, you perv.
12. WHAT DO YOU LiKE DOiNG WHEN YOU`RE DEPRESSED?
not sleeping
13. CHEERFUL OR BORiNG?
That depends entirely on the abundance of EthOH quantised into semi-finite particles of space-time distortion,
refered to by physicists as "cans"
14. DESCRiBE A PERFECT DATE?
Couple of good friends, couple of initiates, EDIT: some good, homemade, heavily spiked punch & a bottle of port or 2.
15. EVER WONDERED WHY NOBODY KNOWS WHY THE SKY IS
BLUE?
I asked my parents when i was about 5. They got me my first set of science text books, holding the answer to this mystery and many more. The next time I had to ask what felt like a silly thing to ask was when i asked my dad about the surgical techniques involved in grafting new eardrums.
16. EVER BEEN HURT BY LOVE?
Nope. but CUPID THE LITTLE FUCKER, almost took my eye out. Damn flying angels and their twisted games of competative bukake.
17. EVER BEEN IN A FIST FIGHT?
Yes. Also managed to narrowly avoid beeing lynched by Spanish teenagers cause i refused to give into their definition of fun-being thrown into the harbour-without taking most of them with me.
18. EVER HATED ANYONE?
Sure.
19. DO YOU DO ANYTHiNG WHEN A PERSON BREAKS UP WiTH YOU AFTER ONE DAY?
By precedent, I try to tell them that that's cool (at which i fail miserably), then proceed to having rather good sex with them. Or a friend or relative of theirs.
20. GiVE ONE WORD THAT BEST DESCRiBES WHAT YOU`RE FEELiNG NOW.
NEEEEED. C.H.O.C.O.L.A.T.E.
21. DO YOU BELIEVE In YOURSELF?
well yes, thank you. I AM The Son of GAWD. howd'ya figure that one out?
22. EVER PHYSiCALLY HURT YOURSELF?
Yes. For Pleasure? Surprisingly, no.
23. EVER VERBALLY HURT YOURSELF?
Is that like, getting your tongue stuck?
24. MOTTO iN LiFE:
Do you want fries with that?
25. HAVE YOU EVER DOUBTED THAT SOMETiMES?
Sure. Some of those meal deals are rather tempting.
26. HAVE YOU EVER HAD *EXTRA* FEELiNG ABOUT A BEST FRiEND FROM THE OPPOSiTE GENDER?
No. not *EXTRA*.
27. iF YES, WHAT DiD YOU DO ABOUT iT? iF NO, WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
like I said..
28. iS FAME & MONEY THE MOST iMPORTANT THiNGS iN YOUR LiFE?
breakast smeckfast. Who'd want fame if you can be the notorious BIG or event teh divine 2pac, constantly producing new superhits despite being rather dead, said the rabbit to the bloody handed hedgehog.
29. DO YOU MAKE ANY MOVEMENTS OR SOUNDS WHEN YOU`RE SLEEPiNG?
I used to change head-ends of the bed or wake up on the other side of someone I'd fallen asleep next to.
30. ARE YOU DiFFiCULT TO WAKE UP?
Mostly.
31. HOW OFTEN DO YOU SLEEP?
Yes.
32. ARE YOU CONVENiENT WiTH THAt?
Oh, I get it, its one of these psychological ones, isn't it?
A Butterfly.
With Bombs.
33. HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT YOU WERE PERFECT?
Nope. I KNEW.
34. WHO are THE PEOPLE THAT YOU REALLY LOVE AND YOU WILL DO ANYTHING FOR HIM/HER?
Maybe. But its entirely possible I'd do that for somebody I hate, so don't feel to flatered.
NOTE: PLEASE KEEP THE TITLE OF THiS
SURVEY '34 THiNGS ABOUT YOU'