Hold Me Like This
Title: Hold Me Like This
Rating: G for sheer fluff
Pairing: Chanyeol/Kai
Word Count: ~1.5K
A/N: asdbfwjkl;; I really just had to get this out of my system. Chanyeol leaving that space for Kris in the conference nearly killed me. DEEP BREATH I just wanted someone to hold him (although.. he does end up being the holder instead of the holdee) that is all.
Summary: Jongin likes Chanyeol's hugs best.
He should be happy. Sharing a dormitory with five other men didn't give Chanyeol many opportunities to be alone, and yet that night he sat on his bed while everyone else was in the living room. But how could he be happy, when "everyone else" only meant ten of them?
Chanyeol could hear them; hushed voices undoubtedly talking about Yifan's unexpected departure. He could see them, too, in his head: the nine of them sitting in a circle and facing Junmyeon, who stood in the space between the couch and where Luhan sat on the wooden floor hugging his knees.
Chanyeol had been there with them only moments ago, watching Junmyeon's lips move but catching nothing of what the older was saying, then listening to the others express their feelings one by one. It was only when Kyungsoo finished and everyone's eyes settled on Chanyeol did the latter realize they were going in a circle, so he had simply sighed and said "I feel tired," before retreating to the bedroom.
He knew he wasn't the only one who was tired; he wasn't the only one who had struggled during the chaotic rehearsal they just had, but Chanyeol was evidently the only one who couldn't talk about his feelings at the moment. Why did it matter anyway? Whatever he felt now was all because of one person, and that person wasn't even there to listen to him or make him feel any better. So he chose instead to sit there, alone in the shared bedroom, staring at his trembling hands as he willed himself to cry.
But his eyes stayed dry, and Chanyeol wondered for a moment if he felt more anger than sadness; more disappointment than dejection. The thought, however, was interrupted by two soft knocks on his door.
Chanyeol looked away from his hands just as the door opened a little wider and Jongin's head peered through, a hesitant look on his face as a hand reached up to push the unruly silvery blonde hair away from his eyes. "Hyung, can I come in?"
Chanyeol nodded.
Jongin stepped in and closed the door behind him, walking over to Chanyeol's bed silently. The mattress dipped slightly as the younger kneeled awkwardly beside him. "We thought you went to sleep."
Chanyeol sighed and faced the wall in front of him. "So they asked you to bring me back out there if I'm awake?"
"No. I told them I wanted to go to sleep too." A pause. "But I don't want to be alone right now," he said softly.
"Neither do I," Chanyeol confessed. "I thought I did, but now I think if you came in 5 minutes later, I would've already lost my mind." He could feel the younger's eyes on him, so he turned to meet Jongin's gaze. "I'm glad you're here."
"Can I be honest?" Jongin asked, to which the older nodded. "I came in here for a hug."
Chanyeol gave a small laugh. "There are a bunch of guys outside you can hug, and you looked for the one everyone thought was asleep?"
"Your hugs are the best," he said shyly, gaze quickly averted to his knees.
Jongin's comment had caught Chanyeol by surprise. The latter knew they hadn't shared that many hugs, or at least, not the kind of warm embrace with their arms over each other's backs and their heads on the other's shoulders. And yet the young man kneeling on his bed had gone to Chanyeol, of all people, for something he couldn't recall giving much of in the first place.
Then it hit him. Jongin wasn't looking for the aforementioned warm embrace at all; he was looking for something else, something that Chanyeol would do to him and him only.
--
Chanyeol entered the four-digit password for the door and, when the lock beeped lightly, smiled to himself. The last few days spent in Micronesia had been nice, sure, but he had to admit that it was comforting to return to a modern place of stay. So when he opened the door, he found a higher sense of appreciation for the air freshener and heating system, and his heart warmed at the sight of a sleeping Jongin sprawled on the floor in front of the still-switched-on television.
Despite Jongin's perfectly peaceful countenance, the younger's awkwardly-positioned body told Chanyeol that he should wake the other up and send him to bed. Of course, Chanyeol being Chanyeol, the older decided to turn Jongin's body to the side and hug him from behind instead of simply tapping him on the shoulder.
"Honey, I'm home~" the older said in a sing-song voice, then chuckled at his own joke.
"Chanyeol hyung, you stink," Jongin whined, voice gravelly from sleep.
"Is that how you welcome me home?" He tightened his grip. "Yah, be nice to your hyung."
Jongin groaned. "Mm. How are you, are you well?"
"I'm tired, thanks for asking," he answered, eyes closing as he buried his face into the younger's apple-scented hair. "I have souvenirs for everyone."
Jongin's murmur of acknowledgement was the last thing Chanyeol remembered before he fell asleep, arms still wrapped around the other.
--
It had become a habit, then, for the both of them since that night. Whenever Chanyeol returned home late at night from an activity that didn't involve Jongin, he would find the former waiting for him in the living room or on his bed, and Chanyeol would hug him from behind without question. Chanyeol didn't know what it meant to Jongin (for he didn't once ask, or even thought of asking for that matter) but for the older, it was nice to have someone to hold after a long day, especially when that someone had apple-scented hair and warmed him better than a blanket ever could.
Chanyeol dragged himself up the bed then leaned against the headrest and spread his legs in front of him. "Come here," the older said, arms extended for the kneeling man.
Jongin looked up from his knees to Chanyeol, and a small smile graced his lips when he saw the extended arms. He then noiselessly came up to settle in the space between the older's legs, leaned back then lowered himself a little so that his head rested on Chanyeol's chest.
Chanyeol set his chin on the younger's head, careful not to push down too hard, and slid his arms around the other, fingers absent-mindedly caressing slightly darker ones. As he breathed in Jongin's musky scent - sweat mixed in with the unmistakable hint of apple - Chanyeol quietly wondered how many hugs it would take to get over Yifan's departure.
"You know, you always hug me like this when you come back. It's comforting .. to know that someone who left this place came back."
"Do you wish that Kris hyung would hug you like this?" Chanyeol whispered, and watched as a tear dropped onto the other's shirt.
"I kept watching the door," he croaked, "while we were talking. I waited until I couldn't wait anymore.. so I came in here." Jongin turned his head to look up at him, and the reflection of the light seemed to dance around the moist in his eyes. "Some of his things are still with us. He has to come back someday, right?"
Chanyeol wanted to shake his head; he wanted to say that the things Yifan left here didn't have as much personal value to him than they did to the other members; that they would probably get one of the staff to take his things for him if needed; that no, Yifan didn't have to come back, but he was certain Jongin already knew all that. Jongin came here seeking a hug from the wrong person; came here wanting to hear empty words of false hope. So the older swallowed and smiled instead. "Yeah. I'm sure he will one day."
Jongin rolled his eyes and chuckled. "Seems appropriate that his power was flight, huh?"
"Don't," he sighed. "Don't let the anger get to you. It's not worth it."
"If I don't get angry at all, I'll just be sad."
Chanyeol cupped the other's cheeks, thumbs sliding across to wipe away the tears. "So be sad. You won't be alone," he assured and, without thinking, put his lips between Jongin's and led the latter into a gentle, reassuring kiss. "I won't let you be alone."
Jongin's eyes were still loosely shut when Chanyeol broke the kiss. "Then," he said softly as he slowly opened his eyes and faced the front again, "you'll have to promise me you'll always hug me like this. Because as long as EXO still lives, I'll be here."
Chanyeol took another whiff of the younger's hair and gave the latter a peck on the neck. "I promise."
It was only when the sun had risen did Chanyeol finally fall asleep, only to be woken up by Jongdae's loud laugh a couple of hours later. Feeling Jongin's slow stir to consciousness calmed Chanyeol, and for the first time since he was given the news about Yifan, he thought that maybe he could survive the gruelling week ahead after all.
END
Rating: G for sheer fluff
Pairing: Chanyeol/Kai
Word Count: ~1.5K
A/N: asdbfwjkl;; I really just had to get this out of my system. Chanyeol leaving that space for Kris in the conference nearly killed me. DEEP BREATH I just wanted someone to hold him (although.. he does end up being the holder instead of the holdee) that is all.
Summary: Jongin likes Chanyeol's hugs best.
He should be happy. Sharing a dormitory with five other men didn't give Chanyeol many opportunities to be alone, and yet that night he sat on his bed while everyone else was in the living room. But how could he be happy, when "everyone else" only meant ten of them?
Chanyeol could hear them; hushed voices undoubtedly talking about Yifan's unexpected departure. He could see them, too, in his head: the nine of them sitting in a circle and facing Junmyeon, who stood in the space between the couch and where Luhan sat on the wooden floor hugging his knees.
Chanyeol had been there with them only moments ago, watching Junmyeon's lips move but catching nothing of what the older was saying, then listening to the others express their feelings one by one. It was only when Kyungsoo finished and everyone's eyes settled on Chanyeol did the latter realize they were going in a circle, so he had simply sighed and said "I feel tired," before retreating to the bedroom.
He knew he wasn't the only one who was tired; he wasn't the only one who had struggled during the chaotic rehearsal they just had, but Chanyeol was evidently the only one who couldn't talk about his feelings at the moment. Why did it matter anyway? Whatever he felt now was all because of one person, and that person wasn't even there to listen to him or make him feel any better. So he chose instead to sit there, alone in the shared bedroom, staring at his trembling hands as he willed himself to cry.
But his eyes stayed dry, and Chanyeol wondered for a moment if he felt more anger than sadness; more disappointment than dejection. The thought, however, was interrupted by two soft knocks on his door.
Chanyeol looked away from his hands just as the door opened a little wider and Jongin's head peered through, a hesitant look on his face as a hand reached up to push the unruly silvery blonde hair away from his eyes. "Hyung, can I come in?"
Chanyeol nodded.
Jongin stepped in and closed the door behind him, walking over to Chanyeol's bed silently. The mattress dipped slightly as the younger kneeled awkwardly beside him. "We thought you went to sleep."
Chanyeol sighed and faced the wall in front of him. "So they asked you to bring me back out there if I'm awake?"
"No. I told them I wanted to go to sleep too." A pause. "But I don't want to be alone right now," he said softly.
"Neither do I," Chanyeol confessed. "I thought I did, but now I think if you came in 5 minutes later, I would've already lost my mind." He could feel the younger's eyes on him, so he turned to meet Jongin's gaze. "I'm glad you're here."
"Can I be honest?" Jongin asked, to which the older nodded. "I came in here for a hug."
Chanyeol gave a small laugh. "There are a bunch of guys outside you can hug, and you looked for the one everyone thought was asleep?"
"Your hugs are the best," he said shyly, gaze quickly averted to his knees.
Jongin's comment had caught Chanyeol by surprise. The latter knew they hadn't shared that many hugs, or at least, not the kind of warm embrace with their arms over each other's backs and their heads on the other's shoulders. And yet the young man kneeling on his bed had gone to Chanyeol, of all people, for something he couldn't recall giving much of in the first place.
Then it hit him. Jongin wasn't looking for the aforementioned warm embrace at all; he was looking for something else, something that Chanyeol would do to him and him only.
--
Chanyeol entered the four-digit password for the door and, when the lock beeped lightly, smiled to himself. The last few days spent in Micronesia had been nice, sure, but he had to admit that it was comforting to return to a modern place of stay. So when he opened the door, he found a higher sense of appreciation for the air freshener and heating system, and his heart warmed at the sight of a sleeping Jongin sprawled on the floor in front of the still-switched-on television.
Despite Jongin's perfectly peaceful countenance, the younger's awkwardly-positioned body told Chanyeol that he should wake the other up and send him to bed. Of course, Chanyeol being Chanyeol, the older decided to turn Jongin's body to the side and hug him from behind instead of simply tapping him on the shoulder.
"Honey, I'm home~" the older said in a sing-song voice, then chuckled at his own joke.
"Chanyeol hyung, you stink," Jongin whined, voice gravelly from sleep.
"Is that how you welcome me home?" He tightened his grip. "Yah, be nice to your hyung."
Jongin groaned. "Mm. How are you, are you well?"
"I'm tired, thanks for asking," he answered, eyes closing as he buried his face into the younger's apple-scented hair. "I have souvenirs for everyone."
Jongin's murmur of acknowledgement was the last thing Chanyeol remembered before he fell asleep, arms still wrapped around the other.
--
It had become a habit, then, for the both of them since that night. Whenever Chanyeol returned home late at night from an activity that didn't involve Jongin, he would find the former waiting for him in the living room or on his bed, and Chanyeol would hug him from behind without question. Chanyeol didn't know what it meant to Jongin (for he didn't once ask, or even thought of asking for that matter) but for the older, it was nice to have someone to hold after a long day, especially when that someone had apple-scented hair and warmed him better than a blanket ever could.
Chanyeol dragged himself up the bed then leaned against the headrest and spread his legs in front of him. "Come here," the older said, arms extended for the kneeling man.
Jongin looked up from his knees to Chanyeol, and a small smile graced his lips when he saw the extended arms. He then noiselessly came up to settle in the space between the older's legs, leaned back then lowered himself a little so that his head rested on Chanyeol's chest.
Chanyeol set his chin on the younger's head, careful not to push down too hard, and slid his arms around the other, fingers absent-mindedly caressing slightly darker ones. As he breathed in Jongin's musky scent - sweat mixed in with the unmistakable hint of apple - Chanyeol quietly wondered how many hugs it would take to get over Yifan's departure.
"You know, you always hug me like this when you come back. It's comforting .. to know that someone who left this place came back."
"Do you wish that Kris hyung would hug you like this?" Chanyeol whispered, and watched as a tear dropped onto the other's shirt.
"I kept watching the door," he croaked, "while we were talking. I waited until I couldn't wait anymore.. so I came in here." Jongin turned his head to look up at him, and the reflection of the light seemed to dance around the moist in his eyes. "Some of his things are still with us. He has to come back someday, right?"
Chanyeol wanted to shake his head; he wanted to say that the things Yifan left here didn't have as much personal value to him than they did to the other members; that they would probably get one of the staff to take his things for him if needed; that no, Yifan didn't have to come back, but he was certain Jongin already knew all that. Jongin came here seeking a hug from the wrong person; came here wanting to hear empty words of false hope. So the older swallowed and smiled instead. "Yeah. I'm sure he will one day."
Jongin rolled his eyes and chuckled. "Seems appropriate that his power was flight, huh?"
"Don't," he sighed. "Don't let the anger get to you. It's not worth it."
"If I don't get angry at all, I'll just be sad."
Chanyeol cupped the other's cheeks, thumbs sliding across to wipe away the tears. "So be sad. You won't be alone," he assured and, without thinking, put his lips between Jongin's and led the latter into a gentle, reassuring kiss. "I won't let you be alone."
Jongin's eyes were still loosely shut when Chanyeol broke the kiss. "Then," he said softly as he slowly opened his eyes and faced the front again, "you'll have to promise me you'll always hug me like this. Because as long as EXO still lives, I'll be here."
Chanyeol took another whiff of the younger's hair and gave the latter a peck on the neck. "I promise."
It was only when the sun had risen did Chanyeol finally fall asleep, only to be woken up by Jongdae's loud laugh a couple of hours later. Feeling Jongin's slow stir to consciousness calmed Chanyeol, and for the first time since he was given the news about Yifan, he thought that maybe he could survive the gruelling week ahead after all.
END