(no subject)
God damn - even pressing the 'log in' button took me about 5 minutes to do!
After many, many drinks. Martin (the guy that's had a crush on me for about 6 months) asked me, "What do you look for in a penis?"
My answer -
finished work. went to pub. found work people - parky, mike, paul, gemma (?), jez and other girl. bought a drink - smirnoff ice. no money left. by the time i had rejoined the group - i had finished my drink, oops.
hmm, more drinks. pint of bud? and lemonade to make shandy. sat at table next to mike and he says to martin "you know, if anyone at work found out that i slept with lauren at work - i'd be fired". me - :o "what!?". everyone looks in shock. "lauren, you slept with mike?"...before i could answer everyone had already concluded that i had! so i went along with the story to wind martin up...
but then ihad dave, martin and paul all get jealous! and mike was very touchy feely... id din't know what to think, other than "BACK OFF!".
hmm...more drinks....barcardi...vodka...vodka...vodka....vodka and more vodka...and then even more vodka...ouch, wasted. find myself on other side of bar with sarah and her friedns. "are ytou drunk, lauren?". "noooo...course not". next thing i know - i'm on the floor. how did that happen?
toilet time. walk through...girl touching herself up infront of mirror. both hands on her breasts, like, wtf?
go back and more vodka...talking at table. hayley and gemma both there, discussing the pub calendar thar thay did in aid of charity. gemma was in there and hayley said, "she loooks familiar...wait, i remember her from bed!". me - "bed!?". "yeh, we used to date!".
seeing as hayley is now pregnant and dating a homophobic i asked, "so you're bisexual then? and your boyfriend is homophobic?". "yeh, perfect match aye" hayley replied. then Paul said, "so you're homophobic *points to parky*, you're bisexual *points to hayley*...now all we need is a homersexual!". "i'm gay!" said i.
everyone asking, "are you gay, cos if so that is a waste". lots and lots of compliments from both boys and girls, wahey. then jez threw a lemon at me and it went in my eye. lemon in the eye makes lauren cry, aii.
then all i remember is being with sarah again and having Bain write on my back....stuff like, 'Bain is fit'. "lauren, out of this whole room - who would you sleep with?". "that girl over there, talking to paul". she was nice. i had noticed her hours ago. dancing with johm? why was i dancing with john? i was though...
hmm. then i was back with the work crew and i was smoking. why was i smoking?
next thing i know - mike was picking up some drunk off of the floor and i was thinking, "what, shouldn't it be the other way rund?". hmm, got let into silks. more drinks. seats. talking about relationships. neil. fuck. get in some serious deep conversations about neil. realise, fuck i miss him. should i text him? then...i'm saved, distracted...katey dunstall came on radio. i dance. me happy again....mmmm kt.
wahey, more smokes.
came home and stuffed face with pie. yum. and now i sleeep!
After many, many drinks. Martin (the guy that's had a crush on me for about 6 months) asked me, "What do you look for in a penis?"
My answer -
finished work. went to pub. found work people - parky, mike, paul, gemma (?), jez and other girl. bought a drink - smirnoff ice. no money left. by the time i had rejoined the group - i had finished my drink, oops.
hmm, more drinks. pint of bud? and lemonade to make shandy. sat at table next to mike and he says to martin "you know, if anyone at work found out that i slept with lauren at work - i'd be fired". me - :o "what!?". everyone looks in shock. "lauren, you slept with mike?"...before i could answer everyone had already concluded that i had! so i went along with the story to wind martin up...
but then ihad dave, martin and paul all get jealous! and mike was very touchy feely... id din't know what to think, other than "BACK OFF!".
hmm...more drinks....barcardi...vodka...vodka...vodka....vodka and more vodka...and then even more vodka...ouch, wasted. find myself on other side of bar with sarah and her friedns. "are ytou drunk, lauren?". "noooo...course not". next thing i know - i'm on the floor. how did that happen?
toilet time. walk through...girl touching herself up infront of mirror. both hands on her breasts, like, wtf?
go back and more vodka...talking at table. hayley and gemma both there, discussing the pub calendar thar thay did in aid of charity. gemma was in there and hayley said, "she loooks familiar...wait, i remember her from bed!". me - "bed!?". "yeh, we used to date!".
seeing as hayley is now pregnant and dating a homophobic i asked, "so you're bisexual then? and your boyfriend is homophobic?". "yeh, perfect match aye" hayley replied. then Paul said, "so you're homophobic *points to parky*, you're bisexual *points to hayley*...now all we need is a homersexual!". "i'm gay!" said i.
everyone asking, "are you gay, cos if so that is a waste". lots and lots of compliments from both boys and girls, wahey. then jez threw a lemon at me and it went in my eye. lemon in the eye makes lauren cry, aii.
then all i remember is being with sarah again and having Bain write on my back....stuff like, 'Bain is fit'. "lauren, out of this whole room - who would you sleep with?". "that girl over there, talking to paul". she was nice. i had noticed her hours ago. dancing with johm? why was i dancing with john? i was though...
hmm. then i was back with the work crew and i was smoking. why was i smoking?
next thing i know - mike was picking up some drunk off of the floor and i was thinking, "what, shouldn't it be the other way rund?". hmm, got let into silks. more drinks. seats. talking about relationships. neil. fuck. get in some serious deep conversations about neil. realise, fuck i miss him. should i text him? then...i'm saved, distracted...katey dunstall came on radio. i dance. me happy again....mmmm kt.
wahey, more smokes.
came home and stuffed face with pie. yum. and now i sleeep!