(no subject)

[interstateight]

why can't i be a good sister
or a good daughter
why isn't anything enough
why can't i be a good friend
where did you all go
why can't i be strong and healthy and happy
with so many good things going for me
why can't i let go
and accept the things that happen and the things that didn't and never will
why can't i settle for anything less than perfect
why can't i show you how much you mean to me
why can't i commit and let you trust me
give you good reason to trust me
why is that so scary
why can't i balance a few simple things
without going completely out of my mind
why can't i just fucking smile
and make conversation
and ignore
ignore
ignore
this war
that's been going on inside

i'm running out of places to hide.