what is jesus' last name?
its been a long time since i've written anything substancial here.. or anywhere else for that matter. and i really dont want to start with that for awhile.. substancial things.
another school year over and perhaps my last for the time being. i really lack the strength to teach high school students effectively anymore. even watching boston public a few hours ago was tiring. im that burned out. and then theres the issue with some of my immediate superiors.. but thats trivial as of the moment.
see? i cant think straight. everything comes off as.. choppy. fuck it. what id really like is to get my ass back in school and make some other teacher's life a living hell for a few months. maybe for perspective. however, certain developments have arisen that would certainly not make it possible for me to sign up for school anytime soon. i wont go into the specifics (when have i ever?) but it would certainly involve a steamer, perhaps a brush with the law, for sure a letter of resignation, and maybe even a trip somewhere far far away.
and i continue to rant..
where has all the time gone? i look in the mirror and find nothing but my own self-doubt, chipping away at my already shaky resolve that everything will be fine. i cast a passing glance, afraid that id catch myself staring at what i've become, but i always do, as the natural laws of science dictate.
there.
that word. dictate. how i hate it so. where the fuck is the sense here? and the cohesion? and more importantly, the fucking point?! choppy. choppy choppy choppy.
there is no point i fear. and the few that have read this far, feel free to reprimand me. i sorely need it.. along with a smack on the head.
god help me.
i need it very badly.
another school year over and perhaps my last for the time being. i really lack the strength to teach high school students effectively anymore. even watching boston public a few hours ago was tiring. im that burned out. and then theres the issue with some of my immediate superiors.. but thats trivial as of the moment.
see? i cant think straight. everything comes off as.. choppy. fuck it. what id really like is to get my ass back in school and make some other teacher's life a living hell for a few months. maybe for perspective. however, certain developments have arisen that would certainly not make it possible for me to sign up for school anytime soon. i wont go into the specifics (when have i ever?) but it would certainly involve a steamer, perhaps a brush with the law, for sure a letter of resignation, and maybe even a trip somewhere far far away.
and i continue to rant..
where has all the time gone? i look in the mirror and find nothing but my own self-doubt, chipping away at my already shaky resolve that everything will be fine. i cast a passing glance, afraid that id catch myself staring at what i've become, but i always do, as the natural laws of science dictate.
there.
that word. dictate. how i hate it so. where the fuck is the sense here? and the cohesion? and more importantly, the fucking point?! choppy. choppy choppy choppy.
there is no point i fear. and the few that have read this far, feel free to reprimand me. i sorely need it.. along with a smack on the head.
god help me.
i need it very badly.