[for childofhumanity]

Feb 01, 2009 19:26

He hasn't gone home since his second Nexus kidnapping. It's funny because this time he actually wants to, this time he knows he needs to escape this hell. But then there's the Pegasus (why is it even there?) and a likely civil war, and the fact that everything he did in that world was probably destroyed in the time he went missing from it. The vice president, five days missing, covered in new cuts and bruises without a sane-sounding way to explain it? No. Excuses only work once. Even last time, he was dangerously close to losing his credibility, and with Admiral Cain as the new head, he knows they won't be able to stand for it. Not now.

He thinks about giving up, about taking a portal to Earth and tracking down that nice, blonde reporter instead of floundering out on Galactica. After all, his Six has been quiet lately. She hasn't been talking about his path or following the wrong destiny, and so he figures, maybe, that he can get away with it. Step off the boat. Leave his path. He remembers what She said about abandoning their child, though. He remembers music. He remembers Gina.

He doesn't know what to do.

He checked himself into the clinics to take care of the dehydration, but that was three days ago. There's nothing left to do, now-- nothing but think and find hotel rooms and try to enjoy the solid ground that could just as easily snatch him up and ruin him again. He is ruined. That's the whole point of the Nexus, isn't it? That's its only point.

He's afraid of leaving his hotel room, but he makes himself go out anyway, if only for the fresh air and the fear that he'll go crazy (as in actual crazy) if he's alone for too long. His legs and feet are too sore to go for a walk, and so he finds one of the convenient Nexus couches instead and sits. He watches the people going by, and then he ignores them, and then he drops his head into his hands. How is he supposed to deal with this? How is he supposed to deal with any of this?
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