Nine To Five, Tuesday Night's Off
It's the same dream most nights. Tuesdays are my off days from the nightmares. Don't know why. Guess it's 'cause I'm usually too tired to dream on Tuesdays, late nights. The dreams always the same, same place, same dialogue. It's like a movie that got caught in automatic rewind. It drives me nuts. But not as much as not knowin how it ends. You ever had that? When ya see a movie ya really like and for some reason, some weird coincidence ya don't see the end of it. It's like a splinter in your mind, you're constantly tryin to figure it out. Workin all the angles, every different perspective mapped out in all it's glory. You wouldn't be doing this with you knowin it, naw, that'd be crazy, it's all subconscious. That's how it is. I always wake up before the end, sometimes I get so close where I know the resolution is coming and then something, a beam of light or birdsong rockets me outta bed harder than a twelve gauge. I ain't got any explanation for how it happened, why I get it almost every night. Mostly 'cause I don't want to look back at my life, it's one giant foul up, reviewing the mess would just make me depressed. Some people say I should go see a shrink, see what it all means. Talk to somebody who knows what they're talkin about. But I dunno I don't trust shrinks, they always got bad news, and everytime you close the door to their office you feel like somethins' horribly wrong with ya. And these dreams are screwed up enough without some four-eyed shrink lookin over their nose at me and tellin me how 'interesting' it is. That's not what I need. Naw. I need to know the end, I need to know how everything turns out, I got everything memorized, right up to the part where it starts to rain. After that it's all a blur. I wanna know if the sun comes out. If I get the cliched 'horse into the sunset' ending. Or somethin more realisic ya know? Somethin a little bit grittier to fit the times. That's usually how those movies end right? With the kinda weird solution where nobody goes home happy especially not the guy you were rootin' for? I just wanna know how the whole thing turns out, I wanna wake up.