Strip to the waist, we're going to fight this out
Only the numbered list will do.
1. I went underground and studied a lot for my critical care certification exam, which I passed. So now I have more letters following my name and also a coca-cola addiction that is in the tapering off stage.
2. Now my job is to talk more people into taking the exam and getting certified, which I start with "the exam was hard, but not bone-crushing..." Which is a half lie.
3. I got to go on a sweet business trip to Chicago (my kind of town). My job paid for every single thing except alcohol, and I got paid 40 hours for this, so they kind of did pay for alcohol. It was excellent. It was so different from my day to day job, I loved wearing a skirt and heels and lipstick and going to class all day. It was perfection. I am such a huge nerd I would go to these classes all day if they would let me. We did a poster presentation, which I thought would kind of be like science fair, and kind of was, and it went well. The abstract was published, so that makes me quasi-published?
4. So that was what 9200 nurses looked like.
5. They say Chicago is like a clean New York. Fine. Of course there was shopping and Chinatown. I went to some sweet restaurants and piano bars and a female impersonator show. You could not believe these were men and not really hot women as you stuffed dollars down their shirts. They were hot, it was not even right.
6. Most nights we went out, we did not pick up the tab. Guys were throwing free drink/buckets of beer/etc. at us and picking up checks. I do not remember it being like this when I was single, PS. At all.
7. I love being a nurse, but some days I have this little fantasy where I quit what I'm doing and go to culinary school. I think that would be really fun, I don't think being yelled at over how I chop an onion will compare to some of the thing I put up with.
8. I had this little fantasy just the other day as I waited for my 596 pound patient to arrive from my least favorite outside hospital. I am not even kidding.
9. The only problem with culinary school is then I would have to cook for people, and that would probably mean crumby hours, weekends, and holidays and I've already got that. I would just want to cook sweet food at home, and that doesn't really justify culinary school.
10. Just the other day, I went to a staff meeting where my manager told us we had to keep our thongs in our pants and not to let them peek out. Excuse me? You paid me an hour of overtime for this? I thought I hallucinated this, but I checked with 10 people and this meeting really did happen. Swear to God.
11. Also, if you thong hangs out, I should tell you about it and not tattle to other people. Swear to God, that was also part of the meeting.
12. I had the moms (Wayne's mom and aunt) over for Mother's Day brunch and I served non-alcoholic mimosas and they were telling all kinds of secrets. Like what kinds of drugs they used to like. I shrudder to think of what I could have unearthed with real drinks. A good time was had by all.
13. My father-in-law broke his wrist this week and there was this little glimpse of what taking care of him someday might be like. I really do not want to take care of him. I hope this is just me being 27 and selfish and him being a little bit sick/helpless. This is a whole other page of blog for another day.
14. My favorite father-in-law Don was upset because we had the family over for a little picnic and I didn't have any beer (gasp) and "Sonia always has Yeungling..." Because he and I both married into this circus, we hang back at these gatherings and are comforted by cold beverage. We actually have a little club, he and I and the others that married in, and we reflect of the sheer madness of the family. We haven't had a meeting in a while. I am truly upset that I might have let Don down by not providing said beverage. I must make amends. I feel like this was part of my hostess duties, and you do know that sins of hospitality are in the highest circle of the inferno...
15. This is the difference between Don and my other father-in-law, because I am truly upset by this and if it were the other father-in-law saying that I wouldn't care less.
16. The Pom will never die. Never. Our vet is committed to healing his little flaws and he is looking very well but still acting as awful as ever.
17. I guess it is true, only the good die young.
18. Last night I watched Misery and that scared me on many levels.
19. And if you're looking for a book, may I suggest Candy Girl. It is by Diablo Cody (screenwriter, author Juno) and how she gives up her life for a year and becomes a stripper in Minnesota, just to write about it. Hilarious. It is in the mail to Romy, because we used to live with someone who heard the siren's song of stripping. Then sold out for Olive Garden. Same thing.
20. The weather is finally cooperating and so that means I'm outside all the time gardening. Playing in the dirt relaxes me and four year olds across the world.
21. My husband is in frickin love with another camper. It's the other woman in our marriage. His fantasy camper. Every other word out of his mouth.
22. It could always be worse.
1. I went underground and studied a lot for my critical care certification exam, which I passed. So now I have more letters following my name and also a coca-cola addiction that is in the tapering off stage.
2. Now my job is to talk more people into taking the exam and getting certified, which I start with "the exam was hard, but not bone-crushing..." Which is a half lie.
3. I got to go on a sweet business trip to Chicago (my kind of town). My job paid for every single thing except alcohol, and I got paid 40 hours for this, so they kind of did pay for alcohol. It was excellent. It was so different from my day to day job, I loved wearing a skirt and heels and lipstick and going to class all day. It was perfection. I am such a huge nerd I would go to these classes all day if they would let me. We did a poster presentation, which I thought would kind of be like science fair, and kind of was, and it went well. The abstract was published, so that makes me quasi-published?
4. So that was what 9200 nurses looked like.
5. They say Chicago is like a clean New York. Fine. Of course there was shopping and Chinatown. I went to some sweet restaurants and piano bars and a female impersonator show. You could not believe these were men and not really hot women as you stuffed dollars down their shirts. They were hot, it was not even right.
6. Most nights we went out, we did not pick up the tab. Guys were throwing free drink/buckets of beer/etc. at us and picking up checks. I do not remember it being like this when I was single, PS. At all.
7. I love being a nurse, but some days I have this little fantasy where I quit what I'm doing and go to culinary school. I think that would be really fun, I don't think being yelled at over how I chop an onion will compare to some of the thing I put up with.
8. I had this little fantasy just the other day as I waited for my 596 pound patient to arrive from my least favorite outside hospital. I am not even kidding.
9. The only problem with culinary school is then I would have to cook for people, and that would probably mean crumby hours, weekends, and holidays and I've already got that. I would just want to cook sweet food at home, and that doesn't really justify culinary school.
10. Just the other day, I went to a staff meeting where my manager told us we had to keep our thongs in our pants and not to let them peek out. Excuse me? You paid me an hour of overtime for this? I thought I hallucinated this, but I checked with 10 people and this meeting really did happen. Swear to God.
11. Also, if you thong hangs out, I should tell you about it and not tattle to other people. Swear to God, that was also part of the meeting.
12. I had the moms (Wayne's mom and aunt) over for Mother's Day brunch and I served non-alcoholic mimosas and they were telling all kinds of secrets. Like what kinds of drugs they used to like. I shrudder to think of what I could have unearthed with real drinks. A good time was had by all.
13. My father-in-law broke his wrist this week and there was this little glimpse of what taking care of him someday might be like. I really do not want to take care of him. I hope this is just me being 27 and selfish and him being a little bit sick/helpless. This is a whole other page of blog for another day.
14. My favorite father-in-law Don was upset because we had the family over for a little picnic and I didn't have any beer (gasp) and "Sonia always has Yeungling..." Because he and I both married into this circus, we hang back at these gatherings and are comforted by cold beverage. We actually have a little club, he and I and the others that married in, and we reflect of the sheer madness of the family. We haven't had a meeting in a while. I am truly upset that I might have let Don down by not providing said beverage. I must make amends. I feel like this was part of my hostess duties, and you do know that sins of hospitality are in the highest circle of the inferno...
15. This is the difference between Don and my other father-in-law, because I am truly upset by this and if it were the other father-in-law saying that I wouldn't care less.
16. The Pom will never die. Never. Our vet is committed to healing his little flaws and he is looking very well but still acting as awful as ever.
17. I guess it is true, only the good die young.
18. Last night I watched Misery and that scared me on many levels.
19. And if you're looking for a book, may I suggest Candy Girl. It is by Diablo Cody (screenwriter, author Juno) and how she gives up her life for a year and becomes a stripper in Minnesota, just to write about it. Hilarious. It is in the mail to Romy, because we used to live with someone who heard the siren's song of stripping. Then sold out for Olive Garden. Same thing.
20. The weather is finally cooperating and so that means I'm outside all the time gardening. Playing in the dirt relaxes me and four year olds across the world.
21. My husband is in frickin love with another camper. It's the other woman in our marriage. His fantasy camper. Every other word out of his mouth.
22. It could always be worse.