hey boo-boo.
In 1947, a man by the name of Art Clokey, discovered Gumby living in a cave deep within the legendary Eastern Kansas Mountains (LEKM). Gumby was found living off of the remains of humans who had unknowingly wandered into the reaches of his dark cave dwelling. Clokey, risking his life, had been well informed of the legendary Gumbignacio Clayictimous through the secret underground Nazi writings known only as the "CX-233's", but had decided to venture into no-man's land in search of this legendary creature.
When Clokey arrived, it is said that he had brought clay oranges for the elusive Gumbignacio that he had found along the way, and upon entering the cave, and smelling the clay fruit, the ferocious creature was humbled by the presence of Clokey, and they instantly hit it off, and even managed to get to third base by the second date.
2 years later, on that infamous, July 25th, 1949 (also known as "The Day of The Clay"); Clokey, being completely fed up with Gumby's drug use, dishonesty, and freaky sex parties, had had enough. When gumby arrived from the sex club that night, obviously high on rock cocaine and pcp, he was rudely awakened by a rock to the head and a book jammed into his clay genetalia with the force of a thousand men.
At first, Gumby was enraged at the thought of his thoroughly crushed genetalia, and newly damaged green skull; but once he looked in the mirror and realized his sex parts had gone into the book realm and had not been destroyed, it occured to him that his new look and escaped penis and balls into the just-discovered 5th "book dimension", was the perfect chance for a long running tv show, and not to mention some kooky adventures as well.
The rest of the story is history until October 1994, when Gumby came home to find the Clokey and with both of the blockheads fumbling around in the shower. Gumby proceeded to cut the gas line to both the stove and heater, and secured every window and door to seal in the fumes. Before any of the three even had a chance to smell the gas leak, Gumby began to light his long-unloved crackpipe and blew the entire estate to Kingdome Come; where they all live now with a few horses and alot of puppies with 3 legs. They smoke alot of pot.
-2006 Randy Fulgham.