(no subject)
I was worried about being scared of vampires, reading The Strain when I'm home alone. (Dunno why I'd be scared of that, when I've been reading loads of vamp fiction since I was a kid, but I was scared of being scared, if that makes sense at all) What I should have worried about was a panic attack, though. Haven't had one in ages. Forgot how it felt. And the only people I could talk to about it are either in Japan, or depressed themselves. So I ran to the place I find most comforting, at least here in Malaysia - the bookstore.
I said that I didn't know why, but it really is probably because I've been so angry these past few weeks. Sometimes at specific people/things, sometimes for no reason. And I really can't handle anger very well. Not being able to express my anger completely doesn't help - it's like in that Barzak story, people may understand the language I speak but it doesn't mean they understand. I miss Akane.
On a lighter note, Ichigo put up a YouTube link to the KAT-TUN show with Hyde & Ken (of Laruku) and it was so fucking funny. I used to watch this, whenever I'm alone in my dorm room. Before I left for Japan, I watched Japanese shows about as much as English-language ones. In Japan I only watched Japanese variety shows and dramas, but the moment I came back I immediately stopped watching new dramas or show episodes. Too much I don't want to remember? I forgot how funny Hyde is, how watching these stupid shows (and they really do some REALLY STUPID STUFF on these shows) cheer me up so much.
I said that I didn't know why, but it really is probably because I've been so angry these past few weeks. Sometimes at specific people/things, sometimes for no reason. And I really can't handle anger very well. Not being able to express my anger completely doesn't help - it's like in that Barzak story, people may understand the language I speak but it doesn't mean they understand. I miss Akane.
On a lighter note, Ichigo put up a YouTube link to the KAT-TUN show with Hyde & Ken (of Laruku) and it was so fucking funny. I used to watch this, whenever I'm alone in my dorm room. Before I left for Japan, I watched Japanese shows about as much as English-language ones. In Japan I only watched Japanese variety shows and dramas, but the moment I came back I immediately stopped watching new dramas or show episodes. Too much I don't want to remember? I forgot how funny Hyde is, how watching these stupid shows (and they really do some REALLY STUPID STUFF on these shows) cheer me up so much.