in me
sometimes i wonder whether i have it in me anymore.
after hours of sititng at the library, shifting around from floor to floor and fucking with my computer for most of them, i've yet to say to myself: you will stay here all night and be productive.
its irritating. perhaps i'm.... drumroll.... burnt out?!
its so backwards that i'm skipping class for two days because its the only way i will be able to finish the sheer amount of work that i have to do.
what do you do when you have to write twenty pages on something that you dont understand. philosophy is like the neverending mental hallucination; every time i think i understand/see something, i read/look/think a little closer/harder, and it dissapears into thin air.
in other news, i've developed a new system:
packing lunches w/ precounted calorie counts.
i'm still unsure as to how much i'm going to restrict but i've got 450 till 9pm. which means that at most (unless the binging monster comes to visit) i'll stay at or below 800. Ideally, I want to stay at or below 6, but given that its finals, that might be hard to do if i plan on drinking flavored coffee. then again, sugarfree redbull is only 10 cals. god, this is a boring conversation. im gonna go shoot myself in the face.
i wonder where my friends are...
oh, far away.
after hours of sititng at the library, shifting around from floor to floor and fucking with my computer for most of them, i've yet to say to myself: you will stay here all night and be productive.
its irritating. perhaps i'm.... drumroll.... burnt out?!
its so backwards that i'm skipping class for two days because its the only way i will be able to finish the sheer amount of work that i have to do.
what do you do when you have to write twenty pages on something that you dont understand. philosophy is like the neverending mental hallucination; every time i think i understand/see something, i read/look/think a little closer/harder, and it dissapears into thin air.
in other news, i've developed a new system:
packing lunches w/ precounted calorie counts.
i'm still unsure as to how much i'm going to restrict but i've got 450 till 9pm. which means that at most (unless the binging monster comes to visit) i'll stay at or below 800. Ideally, I want to stay at or below 6, but given that its finals, that might be hard to do if i plan on drinking flavored coffee. then again, sugarfree redbull is only 10 cals. god, this is a boring conversation. im gonna go shoot myself in the face.
i wonder where my friends are...
oh, far away.