Amanda Amethyst Roberts
Amanda Amethyst Roberts
8/14/1997 - 12/10/2014
When I was ten, I received the best possible birthday present a girl could ever ask for. Amanda is half-Bichon Frise, half-Maltese, which we didn't know until late in her life (we thought she was a purebred bichon who had a few quirks unlike normal bichons), though it's likely she knew all along. One thing is for certain, she's 100% spunk. She was the runt of the litter, but it didn't stop her boundless energy. I remember her cute little apricot ears from when she was a puppy. For a short time, she had a phobia of folded purple clothing. A pile of purple laundry fell on her, and whenever she spotted a pile of purple clothes, she growled and barked at it. When we lived on Signal Mountain in Chattanooga, TN, Amanda swallowed one of Dad's rare foreign coins before I went on vacation. On the way home, Mom told me the whole story; the coin clogged Amanda's intestines and she couldn't produce red blood cells anymore. The vet didn't know what was wrong until they gave her an X-ray. They performed surgery and saved Amanda's life. By the time I got home, I cried tears of joy as Amanda, stitches and all, pounced on me and gave me an endless barrage of kisses.
That's right. Amanda is so tough and stubborn that she cheated death when she was only a few years old.
Hell, I'd go on record to say that if Amanda was human, she'd be the strongest feminist in existence. She's 100% Alpha and refuses to let people push her around. Always in authority, but never bossy, Amanda is fiercely devoted to those she cares about. Amanda's also the Team Mom/Mama Bear; she loved loved loved loved loved my sister's old chinchilla Asia, and when he passed away and she got Ryu, she loved him too, like a mother caring for her puppies. She'd wag her tail whenever she saw Asia and would stay close to his cage to keep an eye on him. It's still fresh on my mind the image of Amanda licking Ryu's face, while the poor chin-chin sat there wet and unamused.
Speaking of Signal Mountain. One day, it rained really hard and got stormy. We let Amanda out in the front yard and kind of forgot about her. Eventually I opened the door to let her in, and Amanda was digging a new water-logged hole in our front yard, completely drenched in mud. I tried to scold her and failed; I kept laughing and laughing. She got so muddy and chocolaty that we took a picture of me holding her before we got her into the tub. It's buried in the family's photo collection somewhere... when we find it, I'll definitely share it. :D
Did I mention she's a hero? She's saved our lives more than once.
Twice with Mom, in fact. Mom had an epileptic fit while having a bath and nearly drowned, and another time she slipped in the bathroom and started bleeding profusely and couldn't get up. Both times, she was alone, and I'm certain that one of them took place late at night at ugly o'clock. Both times, Amanda found Mom, and you know what she did? She howled. She howled and howled and howled. She wouldn't stop until SOMEONE woken up and helped Mom. They took her to the hospital on time and saved her life. If Amanda hadn't been there or given up, Mom would've drowned and/or bled to death. Quitting is unfathomable to Amanda, especially when it's a life-or-death situation for her loved ones.
Hell, remember those past journal entries I made about Freddie getting sick around a week ago? Amanda wouldn't leave Freddie alone. She kept sitting outside Mom's door and bringing attention toward Freddie until he finally got taken to the vet. One of the last things she did was save Freddie's life. When he got home after a few days, she immediately got energized. When Freddie napped by the couch that evening, she lay by his side.
Freddie Mercury always absolutely revered Amanda. It's funny, because when we brought him in as a puppy, Amanda curiously leaned forward to sniff him and he growled at her. :P Since then, he's been really attached to her. He always lets her have her share of food and water first, like a butler wanting to please his lady. As Amanda got older, Freddie began to look after her with all the patience and love in the world. When Amanda lost her eyesight and eventually became blind, Freddie would touch her nose with his then step back a little, prompting Amanda to come forward to touch his nose again. Repeating this process, he'd lead her to wherever she needed to go, such as her own food and water bowls.
Earlier in the week, after Freddie's checkup, Amanda couldn't move anymore. I found her shivering by the fridge, lying in her own urine. We washed her and provided her a dog bed and a small blanket and helped her eat and drink. The vet had given us medicine to offer her, but Amanda rejected everything, even the pills she liked. She stopped eating altogether, stopping only to drink... even then, she would throw it back up. The only thing she would respond to was us keeping her comfy. She lived for 17 years with us... that's really long for a dog. It hurt to admit it, but Mom and Dad and I agreed it was better to let her go than deny anything is wrong and have her suffer and be miserable in her last moments. Mom told me a story of how her great-grandmother was denied death by her caretakers, so she starved herself in order to be with her husband again... a fate we didn't want for Amanda. We would take her to the vet to have her put to sleep. I still had school assignments due, but I wasn't in the mood to work at all... I just wanted to be with Amanda. Dad and I were with her for a long time, and I even sung to Amanda a lullaby I remembered singing to her when I met and cradled her as a little puppy: "Once Upon a December" from Anastasia. Freddie never left her side... In a way, I think he seemed to know.
The next morning, Amanda lay in her doggie bed, nice and comfy. I went to the library to try to work on one of my essays, but I just wasn't in the mood at all... Amanda was so much more important to me than some paper I was going to forget about as soon as I turned it in. I ended up talking to a couple close friends about Amanda instead. I walked home, and Mom gave me the news... she was dead.
In a way, it's better that she died at home rather than the vet. Amanda always hated going to the vet, and she much preferred the comfort of home anyway, surrounded by her loved ones. I carried Ryu over to her so he could say goodbye to her. Then Mom said it would be a good idea to wash her so she wouldn't be dirty when she was buried. I wasn't sure if I'd be able to do it, but it ended up being easier than I thought. It reminded me of Cloud lowering Aeris into the Lifestream. It's the easiest bath I ever gave Amanda my entire life; if she were alive, she would've shivered, whined, and constantly keep trying to jump out of the tub. She always was a fighter. :P
A black-and-white cat kept visiting our backyard, and coincidently, sat twice in the place we were going to bury Amanda. Eventually, the family and I wrapped Amanda in a clean blanket and lowered her into her grave; even our last chicken watched with us as we paid our respects. I sang "No One is Alone" from Into the Woods as a farewell, then we laid a rose over her before we buried her.
Freddie's been visibly downcast, but he's coping pretty well. He's not whimpering or howling... Mom and Dad agreed that they should clean the house and care for him better before getting another dog. I've been giving him a TON of hugs and cuddles and love lately, and he would sleep close to me or Dad. Tomorrow, the mall is holding an event by the same people who brought the therapy dogs to my campus, so I'm giving Freddie a bath and taking him to see Santa to cheer him up. He's such a good doggie. ;;
I'm glad I got to say goodbye to Amanda before all the business with Portland starts. It would've been awful not being there in person for her in her last moments, you know? When I get enough funds to be able to support more than just myself and Ryu, I'll be able to give a shelter dog and/or cat a second chance at life.
How coincidental that the last movie I saw is The Book of Life at the dollar theater. I smile thinking about Amanda in the Land of the Living, meeting colorful and festive skeletal versions of my dad's parents and Asia and Beauregard, not to mention pwn'ing and beating up Mom and Dad's old Pekingese, Rocky. Personally, I think she would've preferred to keep all her fur and abandon her arthritis in Doggie Heaven, but as long as Amanda is happy and buzzing in whatever version of paradise that's out there, I'm content as long as she is. :)
I'll never forget you, my darling angel Amanda. I named you that because the name means "worthy of love." Which you definitely are, times a million. Hope you enjoy all those doggie treats and steaks wherever you are. ♥
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