Well she believes that I'd be better off without her... and she believes in me
Can't believe it took me a day to make a sprite comic.
One I'll definitely get toasted for, but eh. Mom gave me a lot of problems and woes and even screamed and heavily critisized me, even pushing me out into the backyard and told me not to come back when having one of those mania attacks. I hate it when she curses too. "Your dogs are fornicating on the couch!" It's... she never said stuff like that. It makes me uncomfortable. Though I may be a curser in my journal and such, I don't like cursing IRL. Even in my journal, just when I'm mad or amazed or something, stuff everyone knows already like the f-word as an adjective. Heck, even on both online and offline, I use mild stuff like "damn" and such. I can't stand sexual slurs. For a LOT of reasons. She apologizes later for being a jerk and saying nasty things about me, and I help her order pizza and help start my brother's bath.
Still hurts though. And it's been heavy on me from these moments alone. I feel like a jerk wishing Mom was still at the hospital. But really. Whenever she talks to me or tries to ask me or something, this sort of thing happens, or I just feel really upset and weighed down and awful. I'm SICK of being pulled into my family's drama.
Well she believes that I'd be better off without her
And she believes in me
Well she believes that I can make things right, yeah
And I want to believe that there's been a change in me
And I hope that she believes
'Cause I wonder if she sees the killer inside me
The lights go down and the clouds are building outside
You close the door and turn the key
But there's no place to hide
And I hope that she believes
'Cause I wonder if she sees the killer inside me
And I hope that she believes
'Cause I wonder if she sees the killer inside me
The killer inside me
The killer inside me
The killer inside me
--"The Killer Inside" by Better Than Ezra
Better go to bed before it kills me. Again.
One I'll definitely get toasted for, but eh. Mom gave me a lot of problems and woes and even screamed and heavily critisized me, even pushing me out into the backyard and told me not to come back when having one of those mania attacks. I hate it when she curses too. "Your dogs are fornicating on the couch!" It's... she never said stuff like that. It makes me uncomfortable. Though I may be a curser in my journal and such, I don't like cursing IRL. Even in my journal, just when I'm mad or amazed or something, stuff everyone knows already like the f-word as an adjective. Heck, even on both online and offline, I use mild stuff like "damn" and such. I can't stand sexual slurs. For a LOT of reasons. She apologizes later for being a jerk and saying nasty things about me, and I help her order pizza and help start my brother's bath.
Still hurts though. And it's been heavy on me from these moments alone. I feel like a jerk wishing Mom was still at the hospital. But really. Whenever she talks to me or tries to ask me or something, this sort of thing happens, or I just feel really upset and weighed down and awful. I'm SICK of being pulled into my family's drama.
Well she believes that I'd be better off without her
And she believes in me
Well she believes that I can make things right, yeah
And I want to believe that there's been a change in me
And I hope that she believes
'Cause I wonder if she sees the killer inside me
The lights go down and the clouds are building outside
You close the door and turn the key
But there's no place to hide
And I hope that she believes
'Cause I wonder if she sees the killer inside me
And I hope that she believes
'Cause I wonder if she sees the killer inside me
The killer inside me
The killer inside me
The killer inside me
--"The Killer Inside" by Better Than Ezra
Better go to bed before it kills me. Again.