(no subject)
Title: Density
Fandom: Mirage of Blaze
Pairing: Kousaka/Takaya, Naoe/Takaya
Genre: Angst
Word Count: 1,663
Notes: Written at about 4 - 5 AM this morning because corialis had a whim for Kousaka/Takaya and I am easily persuaded when I have had no sleep.
Summary: Kousaka concludes that Saburo really is that dense, and decides to give him a little free advice.
Kagetora has always been just a little this side of stupid. Then again, so has his faithful dog.
Another lovers' spat? Kousaka wonders, thoughts tinged with amused mockery. You can't have a lovers' spat if you haven't become lovers yet, however. Naoe's fault, of course. Since he is so obsessed with his liege it only makes sense that he would trip him into bed as soon as the opportunity arose, and Saburo's current incarnation is so vulnerable that surely it would take very little doing. However, Naoe's sanity is more than a bit lacking. He'd go so far to spite his hated beloved as to hurt himself in the process.
Yes, Naoe is a complete idiot. Otherwise, he would never have let his precious Kagetora-sama out alone. As he is now, Saburo is no longer helpless, but he is naïve; he has no idea of the dangers he faces.
"Kagetora."
Takaya looks up from throwing stones viciously into the lake, expression disdainfully blank. "Oh. You."
Kousaka laughs quietly. "Yes. Me."
"Do you want something?" Takaya asks, completely disinterested.
Kousaka finds himself curious as to whether Saburo is really that stupid when it comes to taking care of himself or if he is just beyond caring. "Perhaps. Wouldn't you like to know?"
He leers, gives Takaya the once-over, because sometimes he lives simply for the entertainment of irritating Naoe and nothing does that like encroaching upon his territory.
Takaya doesn't even seem to notice the way Kousaka is looking at him, just shrugs. Either he really is incredibly dense, or he's even more out of it than Kousaka had initially expected. Despite himself, he is mildly concerned; after all, Saburo was once on the same side as he, however long ago it had been, and Kousaka retains somewhat of a soft spot.
"Where is your faithful servant now?" Kousaka asks, a barb concealed in his apparently innocent question.
Takaya flinches. "Not here," he answers shortly. "Go away."
"I don't think I will," Kousaka disagrees, painted lips tilted in a smirk. "Can you take care of yourself, Kagetora? It's dangerous to go off alone, you know. What if I were to attack you?"
"Who cares?" Takaya says dully. "Like it matters. Fuck off."
"I see." Silence, for a time, Kousaka observing Takaya and Takaya pretending Kousaka doesn't exist, at least not near him. Kousaka wonders what fool thing Naoe has done this time, and if he ought to simply laugh or do something to Naoe in return. This inexperienced version of Saburo doesn't understand the game between Kagetora and Naoe, the game of be hurt and lash back out. He won't seek out his own revenge.
Then again, Kousaka is not of an overly altruistic nature. Any favour he grants comes with a price attached.
"You're still here?" Takaya says irritably. "I told you to leave me alone."
"We don't all get what we want in life," Kousaka says prosaically. "Or even lives."
Least of all Kagetora and Naoe.
Kousaka chuckles to himself, trails a hand along Takaya's shoulder. Takaya jumps, turns to glare at him with frightened eyes.
"Stop it!"
"Stop what, Kagetora?" Kousaka inquires politely, fingers tangling in the hair at Takaya's nape.
"That!" Takaya snaps, twisting out of reach like a skittish horse. "Stop touching me! You're all the same, why do you…"
Kousaka smiles brightly, amused by Takaya's confused anger. "A beautiful man is just as dangerous as a beautiful woman: he brings ruin to all around him. Didn't I say you ought to be careful wandering around by yourself? You never know what trouble you might get yourself into."
Takaya is looking truly freaked out by this point, maybe regretting now his rash decision in storming off. "Get… get away from me."
"You're out of your depth, aren't you? A mere boy like you, trying to deal with Kagetora's relationship with Naoe… Poor thing," Kousaka drawls. "You don't have the experience to cope with that kind of thing. You'll drown. He'd see that, if he weren't so crazed."
"Shut up," Takaya orders, horribly shaken. "Shut up, shut up! What do you know?"
Kousaka laughs again. "More than you do."
"I don't want to hear this," Takaya says, but he doesn't even sound certain to himself. "If you don't fuck off, I'll…"
"What?" Koutaka asks when Takaya trails off. "You'll what, Kagetora? You don't have enough control yet to be making threats. You need Naoe, much as it pains you to know that. Let me tell you something," and here he sounds almost kind. "The relationship between you and Naoe is a circle. It never changes, and never breaks; it is simply a cycle of hate and abuse where one of you hurts the other and then the other lashes back harder. It continues because neither one of you can bear to end it."
Takaya looks shocked, lost. He's too immature for the world he is now entangled in. It's a pity, really. "Why should I trust you? How would you know?"
Kousaka shrugs. "Do, don't. It makes no difference to me. I was merely offering you some free advice. If you choose to take it… well, really there's only one course of action available to you: learn to hurt him as much as he hurts you."
"What?" Takaya exclaims loudly. "Fuck this! Like I'm going to listen to-- what kind of advice is that?"
"Good advice," Kousaka says calmly. "The kind of advice that will help you to survive, I should hope."
"I don't even know what the hell you're suggesting," Takaya retorts, and though he's trying not to listen, the part of him that's angry and vicious wants to lash out in any way it can, like a wild animal stuck in a cage.
Kousaka's smile turns suggestive. "Use your knowledge of him. What do you think would hurt him the most, Kagetora?"
Takaya stares at him. "How the fuck should I know?"
Saburo really is rather dense, without his memories or experience. Kousaka fights down an exasperated sigh and leans forward, long tapered fingers curling around Takaya's jaw.
"How do you think?" Kousaka says patiently.
Takaya's eyes go wide. "Hey, wait a fucking minute, you're not suggesting that I-- that I-- no way!"
"There is no better way to hurt a man who loves you," Kousaka purrs, "and wishes to possess you than by giving your body to someone else."
Takaya shivers, paralysed and unable to move even when Kousaka leans forward to lick at his mouth, warm and wet. Takaya's mouth opens automatically when his brain fails to give it any conscious direction, and Kousaka's tongue is practically halfway down his throat. He tastes a lot like lip-gloss, Takaya thinks dimly, and why the hell aren't I doing anything to stop him? but he's in shock and his body won't obey.
Kousaka pulls away and glances back over his shoulder. "Stop attempting to glare a hole through my head," he says candidly. "It won't work."
"Kousaka," Naoe says coldly from where he's standing on the hill, and Takaya starts, because when the fuck did he get here? "What do you think you are doing to Kagetora-sama?"
Kousaka smirks. "Wouldn't you like to know? I'm impressed you found him. Then again, a dog always manages to sniff out its master, doesn't it?"
Takaya flinches; Naoe stiffens.
Kousaka rolls his eyes. "If you'll excuse me, the level of density here is giving me a headache. I'll be leaving now."
He leaves. Neither of them tries to stop him.
"Takaya-san," Naoe says eventually, "are you all right?"
"Mm," Takaya says vaguely. Naoe comes to join him where he is sitting by the water's edge, crouching down and offering him a hand. Takaya doesn't take it, and Naoe looks away awkwardly.
"You shouldn't go off by yourself," Naoe admonished him. "You could have been wounded."
"Mm."
Naoe closes his eyes, face twisting slightly in bitterness. "You let him kiss you."
Takaya doesn't answer.
"Why?"
There is a short silence, punctuated by the sound of the water lapping at the edge of the river. Takaya could ignore him, or he could say something nasty. He's afraid, though, afraid of what Kousaka said about the endless circle and he's young enough and idealistic enough to want to change it, so he tells the truth.
"You hurt me."
Naoe blinks, looks at him with an odd expression. "Kagetora-sama?"
"You hurt me," Takaya repeats quietly. "So I hurt you back, you bastard."
"I see," Naoe says after a pause. He's not quite sure what to make of it.
"I don't want it to be like that," Takaya says abruptly. "Does it have to be?"
"Like what? I'm sure I have no idea what you're referring to."
"Hurting each other." Takaya won't meet his eyes. "Will you hurt me, now? As revenge?"
Naoe hasn't got a clue what to say to that, so he says nothing at all. They sit there mutely for several minutes, Takaya hugging his knees to his chest.
"Don't," he says eventually.
"Pardon?"
"Don't hurt me again on purpose," Takaya says fiercely, clutching at Naoe's jacket. "If you do, I'll… I…"
"You'll hurt me back?" Naoe enquires politely.
Takaya stares at him helplessly before letting his head hang, fists still bunched in Naoe's jacket. "No," he whispers. "I'll fucking leave if you do it again. For good."
Only he won't, not really, and they both know it. At least, Takaya knows it; maybe Naoe has enough doubt to be concerned.
"Don't," Takaya echoes desperately, and before Naoe can think of some kind of reassurance, Takaya moves to seal his mouth clumsily over the older man's. Surprised, Naoe instinctually lets his arms wrap around Takaya's body and kisses back, slow and deep.
Takaya is shaking, Naoe realises, and pulls back.
Takaya is crying.
"Don't hurt me. Don't… don't abandon me," he chokes out, wiping viciously at his eyes. "Shit."
"I won't," Naoe says soothingly.
For now, at least, he means it.
It's enough.
Fandom: Mirage of Blaze
Pairing: Kousaka/Takaya, Naoe/Takaya
Genre: Angst
Word Count: 1,663
Notes: Written at about 4 - 5 AM this morning because corialis had a whim for Kousaka/Takaya and I am easily persuaded when I have had no sleep.
Summary: Kousaka concludes that Saburo really is that dense, and decides to give him a little free advice.
Kagetora has always been just a little this side of stupid. Then again, so has his faithful dog.
Another lovers' spat? Kousaka wonders, thoughts tinged with amused mockery. You can't have a lovers' spat if you haven't become lovers yet, however. Naoe's fault, of course. Since he is so obsessed with his liege it only makes sense that he would trip him into bed as soon as the opportunity arose, and Saburo's current incarnation is so vulnerable that surely it would take very little doing. However, Naoe's sanity is more than a bit lacking. He'd go so far to spite his hated beloved as to hurt himself in the process.
Yes, Naoe is a complete idiot. Otherwise, he would never have let his precious Kagetora-sama out alone. As he is now, Saburo is no longer helpless, but he is naïve; he has no idea of the dangers he faces.
"Kagetora."
Takaya looks up from throwing stones viciously into the lake, expression disdainfully blank. "Oh. You."
Kousaka laughs quietly. "Yes. Me."
"Do you want something?" Takaya asks, completely disinterested.
Kousaka finds himself curious as to whether Saburo is really that stupid when it comes to taking care of himself or if he is just beyond caring. "Perhaps. Wouldn't you like to know?"
He leers, gives Takaya the once-over, because sometimes he lives simply for the entertainment of irritating Naoe and nothing does that like encroaching upon his territory.
Takaya doesn't even seem to notice the way Kousaka is looking at him, just shrugs. Either he really is incredibly dense, or he's even more out of it than Kousaka had initially expected. Despite himself, he is mildly concerned; after all, Saburo was once on the same side as he, however long ago it had been, and Kousaka retains somewhat of a soft spot.
"Where is your faithful servant now?" Kousaka asks, a barb concealed in his apparently innocent question.
Takaya flinches. "Not here," he answers shortly. "Go away."
"I don't think I will," Kousaka disagrees, painted lips tilted in a smirk. "Can you take care of yourself, Kagetora? It's dangerous to go off alone, you know. What if I were to attack you?"
"Who cares?" Takaya says dully. "Like it matters. Fuck off."
"I see." Silence, for a time, Kousaka observing Takaya and Takaya pretending Kousaka doesn't exist, at least not near him. Kousaka wonders what fool thing Naoe has done this time, and if he ought to simply laugh or do something to Naoe in return. This inexperienced version of Saburo doesn't understand the game between Kagetora and Naoe, the game of be hurt and lash back out. He won't seek out his own revenge.
Then again, Kousaka is not of an overly altruistic nature. Any favour he grants comes with a price attached.
"You're still here?" Takaya says irritably. "I told you to leave me alone."
"We don't all get what we want in life," Kousaka says prosaically. "Or even lives."
Least of all Kagetora and Naoe.
Kousaka chuckles to himself, trails a hand along Takaya's shoulder. Takaya jumps, turns to glare at him with frightened eyes.
"Stop it!"
"Stop what, Kagetora?" Kousaka inquires politely, fingers tangling in the hair at Takaya's nape.
"That!" Takaya snaps, twisting out of reach like a skittish horse. "Stop touching me! You're all the same, why do you…"
Kousaka smiles brightly, amused by Takaya's confused anger. "A beautiful man is just as dangerous as a beautiful woman: he brings ruin to all around him. Didn't I say you ought to be careful wandering around by yourself? You never know what trouble you might get yourself into."
Takaya is looking truly freaked out by this point, maybe regretting now his rash decision in storming off. "Get… get away from me."
"You're out of your depth, aren't you? A mere boy like you, trying to deal with Kagetora's relationship with Naoe… Poor thing," Kousaka drawls. "You don't have the experience to cope with that kind of thing. You'll drown. He'd see that, if he weren't so crazed."
"Shut up," Takaya orders, horribly shaken. "Shut up, shut up! What do you know?"
Kousaka laughs again. "More than you do."
"I don't want to hear this," Takaya says, but he doesn't even sound certain to himself. "If you don't fuck off, I'll…"
"What?" Koutaka asks when Takaya trails off. "You'll what, Kagetora? You don't have enough control yet to be making threats. You need Naoe, much as it pains you to know that. Let me tell you something," and here he sounds almost kind. "The relationship between you and Naoe is a circle. It never changes, and never breaks; it is simply a cycle of hate and abuse where one of you hurts the other and then the other lashes back harder. It continues because neither one of you can bear to end it."
Takaya looks shocked, lost. He's too immature for the world he is now entangled in. It's a pity, really. "Why should I trust you? How would you know?"
Kousaka shrugs. "Do, don't. It makes no difference to me. I was merely offering you some free advice. If you choose to take it… well, really there's only one course of action available to you: learn to hurt him as much as he hurts you."
"What?" Takaya exclaims loudly. "Fuck this! Like I'm going to listen to-- what kind of advice is that?"
"Good advice," Kousaka says calmly. "The kind of advice that will help you to survive, I should hope."
"I don't even know what the hell you're suggesting," Takaya retorts, and though he's trying not to listen, the part of him that's angry and vicious wants to lash out in any way it can, like a wild animal stuck in a cage.
Kousaka's smile turns suggestive. "Use your knowledge of him. What do you think would hurt him the most, Kagetora?"
Takaya stares at him. "How the fuck should I know?"
Saburo really is rather dense, without his memories or experience. Kousaka fights down an exasperated sigh and leans forward, long tapered fingers curling around Takaya's jaw.
"How do you think?" Kousaka says patiently.
Takaya's eyes go wide. "Hey, wait a fucking minute, you're not suggesting that I-- that I-- no way!"
"There is no better way to hurt a man who loves you," Kousaka purrs, "and wishes to possess you than by giving your body to someone else."
Takaya shivers, paralysed and unable to move even when Kousaka leans forward to lick at his mouth, warm and wet. Takaya's mouth opens automatically when his brain fails to give it any conscious direction, and Kousaka's tongue is practically halfway down his throat. He tastes a lot like lip-gloss, Takaya thinks dimly, and why the hell aren't I doing anything to stop him? but he's in shock and his body won't obey.
Kousaka pulls away and glances back over his shoulder. "Stop attempting to glare a hole through my head," he says candidly. "It won't work."
"Kousaka," Naoe says coldly from where he's standing on the hill, and Takaya starts, because when the fuck did he get here? "What do you think you are doing to Kagetora-sama?"
Kousaka smirks. "Wouldn't you like to know? I'm impressed you found him. Then again, a dog always manages to sniff out its master, doesn't it?"
Takaya flinches; Naoe stiffens.
Kousaka rolls his eyes. "If you'll excuse me, the level of density here is giving me a headache. I'll be leaving now."
He leaves. Neither of them tries to stop him.
"Takaya-san," Naoe says eventually, "are you all right?"
"Mm," Takaya says vaguely. Naoe comes to join him where he is sitting by the water's edge, crouching down and offering him a hand. Takaya doesn't take it, and Naoe looks away awkwardly.
"You shouldn't go off by yourself," Naoe admonished him. "You could have been wounded."
"Mm."
Naoe closes his eyes, face twisting slightly in bitterness. "You let him kiss you."
Takaya doesn't answer.
"Why?"
There is a short silence, punctuated by the sound of the water lapping at the edge of the river. Takaya could ignore him, or he could say something nasty. He's afraid, though, afraid of what Kousaka said about the endless circle and he's young enough and idealistic enough to want to change it, so he tells the truth.
"You hurt me."
Naoe blinks, looks at him with an odd expression. "Kagetora-sama?"
"You hurt me," Takaya repeats quietly. "So I hurt you back, you bastard."
"I see," Naoe says after a pause. He's not quite sure what to make of it.
"I don't want it to be like that," Takaya says abruptly. "Does it have to be?"
"Like what? I'm sure I have no idea what you're referring to."
"Hurting each other." Takaya won't meet his eyes. "Will you hurt me, now? As revenge?"
Naoe hasn't got a clue what to say to that, so he says nothing at all. They sit there mutely for several minutes, Takaya hugging his knees to his chest.
"Don't," he says eventually.
"Pardon?"
"Don't hurt me again on purpose," Takaya says fiercely, clutching at Naoe's jacket. "If you do, I'll… I…"
"You'll hurt me back?" Naoe enquires politely.
Takaya stares at him helplessly before letting his head hang, fists still bunched in Naoe's jacket. "No," he whispers. "I'll fucking leave if you do it again. For good."
Only he won't, not really, and they both know it. At least, Takaya knows it; maybe Naoe has enough doubt to be concerned.
"Don't," Takaya echoes desperately, and before Naoe can think of some kind of reassurance, Takaya moves to seal his mouth clumsily over the older man's. Surprised, Naoe instinctually lets his arms wrap around Takaya's body and kisses back, slow and deep.
Takaya is shaking, Naoe realises, and pulls back.
Takaya is crying.
"Don't hurt me. Don't… don't abandon me," he chokes out, wiping viciously at his eyes. "Shit."
"I won't," Naoe says soothingly.
For now, at least, he means it.
It's enough.