but all i can do is close my eyes and cross my heart and hope to die.
today in church was kinda sucky. Josh is leaving us. this is like god saying "yupp laura, i know how much you cant handle change, but i'm going to ruin your church family and make everyone leave you
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*sigh*
I take it this is josh english?
i got a random comment from him saying he had the worst day ever. So i wonder if that has anything to do with this. idk.
the sucky part about change is when it comes it hits you HARD. with great impact. it can either be one BIG change or a bunch of little small ones. and sometimes its hard to determine which is worse.
change can be a good thing. it can. every "bad" change that has occurred in my life has somehow turned out better. and some of them have happend 382302039 years ago, and im just realizing it now. sometimes it takes even the simplest things to make you realize it. New surroundings, new friends , old things beocming new again, it all ties together. You were always saying to me how nothing that rough has happend to you, and for the most part things have been going good, and nothing overly drastic has occurred in your life. Well there IS a time for everything. And change is ALWAYS bound to be there to punch you straight in the face, put all of your plans on pause and give you a serious wake up call. And you cant prevent it, but all you can do is cling onto it. And hope that this change will, once again somehow bring the better out in the open.
I love you Laura.
And God says that he never gives us something that we cant handle. Sometimes life is simply just a test of faith. Job didnt just have a friend taken away. Family killed. Farmland claimed, animals dying off, he lost EVERYTHING. And that man never once declared that he was giving up. It makes me sick to my stomack to see how easily i surrender half of the time, knowing that my situation [as bad as i feel it is] could be much worse.
Theres a light at the end of every tunnel.
Basically, always good in something.
Sometimes we dont see it right way.
Some things change,
some things never stay the same.
And in the end we might be
very grateful for it.
in your own words:
"everything will be ok
in the end, and if its not
ok then its not the end
so its not the end yet.
you'll survive.
i promise .
and i love you.
birthday girl.
♥
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