...
ya know, I really, really hate glenn. Not just a little. A lot. And really, I don't think I hate anyone else in the entire world. Sure, there's a lot of people that I don't like, but I think there's just one person that I hate. It's at least twice a week that he starts bitching and complaining at us. What was it about yesterday? Well, it started when I was sitting outside, nearly eight pm, on my laptop. Usually, he starts when we're on our computers or me and Emily are even together in the same room, I've noticed. So, I'm sitting outside, and he starts going on and on about money for college. How it's not fair that my mom works so much, and I'm sitting home doing nothing. How I'm a horrible, lazy person. Apparently, he told my mom that he may pay a bit of money for my books.
Okay. By this point, I've had a grand total of FOUR people tell me that they'd like to buy my books. At this point, until it happens, I'm not believing any of them.
He continues to go on screaming on how we're lazy, I didn't wash clothes and he wasn't going to have anything clean to wear to work. Which is stupid, being that he had told me the night before to wash towels and to NOT wash the damned clothes.
Then he turned it into 'the neighbors have seen us on our computers during the day', and we're all liars because we're not allowed on our computers during the day. Because...we're lazy. Though, it's perfectly fine for us to rot our brains watching TV all day. Apparently, watching a big screen TV with surround sound uses less electric than a laptop.
And what I really hate, he'll act like the nicest person when around other people. Around us?? Well, we're all lazy bitches who aren't worth a damn.
mom said just to make sure everything's all cleaned up so he won't start when he gets home, but it never matters what we clean, he's still just going to yell anyways.
I swear I'm going to snap.
But I can't. Keep telling myself, I can't I can't. It's not even for money, at this point, he can keep his god damned money to himself. I'd rather not have enough money for college than have to take his. It's just that if I snap, I'll be the one in trouble. And every time he's started in the past few weeks, I've just stopped what I was doing and went to bed.
He's a fucking drunk who thinks he's better than us because...lets see:
-my mom doesn't make as much money as he does
-we're not OCD over cleaning
-Emily's too thin
-I'm too big
-we're filthy
-we're idiots
-we're trash
-we come from trash
-I'm not working
-Emily's not good in school
-I'm uptight
-Mom doesn't drink anymore, so SHE'S uptight
.......
I have to be good, I have to keep my cool. If I spaz out, it'll start a chain of events that I won't be able to stop. I don't want to start something while I'm so angry that I can't see, and then I can't stop it. My mom, even my sister, they wouldn't spaz like me. Maybe they'd yell, or complain, but they'll just give up and cry or something. I'd cry, because he makes me cry all the time and is one of the only people alive who can do so, but I don't give up like them. If I lose it to the point that I can't see, then I know bad things will happen and someone will end up hurt.
So, all I've got to do is sit tight and let him scream about how worthless and filthy we are in my face for a little while. I'll just stand tall--because I am taller than him--and look down on this horrible druck and think how stupid this all is.
One day, I won't have to worry about all of this, but that's not today.
Okay. By this point, I've had a grand total of FOUR people tell me that they'd like to buy my books. At this point, until it happens, I'm not believing any of them.
He continues to go on screaming on how we're lazy, I didn't wash clothes and he wasn't going to have anything clean to wear to work. Which is stupid, being that he had told me the night before to wash towels and to NOT wash the damned clothes.
Then he turned it into 'the neighbors have seen us on our computers during the day', and we're all liars because we're not allowed on our computers during the day. Because...we're lazy. Though, it's perfectly fine for us to rot our brains watching TV all day. Apparently, watching a big screen TV with surround sound uses less electric than a laptop.
And what I really hate, he'll act like the nicest person when around other people. Around us?? Well, we're all lazy bitches who aren't worth a damn.
mom said just to make sure everything's all cleaned up so he won't start when he gets home, but it never matters what we clean, he's still just going to yell anyways.
I swear I'm going to snap.
But I can't. Keep telling myself, I can't I can't. It's not even for money, at this point, he can keep his god damned money to himself. I'd rather not have enough money for college than have to take his. It's just that if I snap, I'll be the one in trouble. And every time he's started in the past few weeks, I've just stopped what I was doing and went to bed.
He's a fucking drunk who thinks he's better than us because...lets see:
-my mom doesn't make as much money as he does
-we're not OCD over cleaning
-Emily's too thin
-I'm too big
-we're filthy
-we're idiots
-we're trash
-we come from trash
-I'm not working
-Emily's not good in school
-I'm uptight
-Mom doesn't drink anymore, so SHE'S uptight
.......
I have to be good, I have to keep my cool. If I spaz out, it'll start a chain of events that I won't be able to stop. I don't want to start something while I'm so angry that I can't see, and then I can't stop it. My mom, even my sister, they wouldn't spaz like me. Maybe they'd yell, or complain, but they'll just give up and cry or something. I'd cry, because he makes me cry all the time and is one of the only people alive who can do so, but I don't give up like them. If I lose it to the point that I can't see, then I know bad things will happen and someone will end up hurt.
So, all I've got to do is sit tight and let him scream about how worthless and filthy we are in my face for a little while. I'll just stand tall--because I am taller than him--and look down on this horrible druck and think how stupid this all is.
One day, I won't have to worry about all of this, but that's not today.