Swinging Alone in the Dark
Typical story of Boy meets Girl. Only, this time. It was the girl who made the first move. Independent and driven, she went for what she wanted. Thats not wrong is it? No. It's not. It took a while, but friendship soon settled in, and they became accustomed to each other. Talking with each other. About anything. Or anyone. It didn't matter if the other didn't understand. They had each other. And that's how the girl thought it would be. Not always, of course. But for a while. A long time, she hoped. And she wished.
From a muffin, to a rose, to an uneasy phone call-soon they began "dating".
"dating".
"dating".
For three months. Three months of movies, and holding hands, and getting stronger. Until the end. Although it wasn't really the end. Not "officially", but she felt it. Her friends asked if she was tired of him. But she didn't think she was....she simply didn't feel the same. That's not getting tired of someone. It was her satisfying her desire to know what he was like.....
...and now that she knew. She was okay having him away.
She's okay....right?
Tell me what do you see when you close your eyes. Remember me? I'm still kinda by your side....or do you not see me anymore? Feel me?
It's okay. Because she knew it would never be forever. But it was a while. It was a pretty long time.....
She's okay.....
Then, why do you rub off your eyeliner with tears? Why do you stare at yourself in the mirror, watching the blueblack smears run down your cheeks. It gives you dark, empty eyes. You have the eyes of the dead.
Why do you toss you precious necklace to the bed, not caring how the delicate silver lands. What if the cat gets it? It's not like you to be careless. Why are you hurting? Because you couldn't stop it? Because your melancholy dreams haunt you? But...it's not real. Like you said. It was only a scattered thought. Or is it because....simply, things didn't go your way. They can't always, you know...Be as you imagine. You said you want to wake up from this dream....you don't have control....but....everything can't go your way...
Is this the end?
Because...I think that's what you want. It's what you really want. Only, you don't seem to want to realize it. You'll have to learn sometime...You're in pain right now, but you're blocking it from yourself. You can't always pretend you know.
It's like lying.
Why do you feel like crying when they tell you that you deserve better? That he's really just some guy. Just some summer fling. Why do you flinch at loving memories...and wonder why you wish you wouldn't care what he did....
Why are you crying?
Seren...I think you're in love....