Letting It Out, Letting It Go
Just when I was getting ready to go chill for the superbowl, I got a call....
"My momma stopped breathing, could you please come over."
from xsisinlaw
By the time I made it, she was in the ambulance. LG (sis) waited outside. She started loosing it once I got to her.
I don't know how long they worked on her, but they told us what hospital. We stopped traffic on the block, family was coming in record time. She got in the ambulance, I made sure the boys got out the house, grabbing Tigger. In momma's room, I saw keys, I took them. I looked up, I took a picture...something told me this would be needed later.
Not too long upon arrival, she passed.
Her sisters bowed their heads. LG roared like a wounded child, "It's not supposed to be like this. I pray for NOTHING. I need her with me." Her niece fell to the floor, "No, don't leave me." The boys, the 2 cousins she adopted, Tigger's favorite cousin BB, and Tigger, sat silently and cried, all grandchildren, shocked.
I spent hours trying, and I reached her son. Took me an hour after the fact to remember he was assigned to a ship. Then it took all of us time to remember what ship. An aunt had written it down.
"Baby, (choke) I'm sorry, momma passed."
"What? (he didn't hear me from my sobs)
"Your mother, she passed. Baby she's gone. I'm sorry."
(phone drops, duty officer checks to see if I'm still on the line, a few moments he returns)
"Call her cell phone, LH has it. Did you hear me? She'll tell you everything."
I had to call my xhusband and tell him his mother died.
today is his birthday.
After that call, I got the number to the ER and gave it to him. I took the remaining boys (BB was picked up by his father. LH called him immediately but by the time he got there, we had just been told she passed), the cousins and TIgger and went home. We got some clothes, fed the cats and came to my place.
This woman is the closest relative I've ever lost since I was a child. When this started, I was calm, once I called her son, I started loosing it.
We mourn the passing of Lillian G.
She was damn near 60 this year. Hands down, she was the kindest lady I knew. Rarely told a person no and helped anybody she could. She did this her whole life, struggles and all. She raised 3 generations.
We still can't reach her eldest son.
I can not truly say what this woman means to her family. I can't really say what she means to me. Even after I left her son, nothing changed. She even asked to meet KN and invited him to the holiday gatherings. Wished him a happy birthday once Tigger told her. She was just that kind of a person.
Friday I woke up angry, and that day and Saturday, I've been drinking. I said, "feels like a storm is brewing." KN worried cause I have been that bothered, distracted and lost. Two fucking days all I could say was, "Something is wrong, but I don't know what."
The storm was her.
"My momma stopped breathing, could you please come over."
from xsisinlaw
By the time I made it, she was in the ambulance. LG (sis) waited outside. She started loosing it once I got to her.
I don't know how long they worked on her, but they told us what hospital. We stopped traffic on the block, family was coming in record time. She got in the ambulance, I made sure the boys got out the house, grabbing Tigger. In momma's room, I saw keys, I took them. I looked up, I took a picture...something told me this would be needed later.
Not too long upon arrival, she passed.
Her sisters bowed their heads. LG roared like a wounded child, "It's not supposed to be like this. I pray for NOTHING. I need her with me." Her niece fell to the floor, "No, don't leave me." The boys, the 2 cousins she adopted, Tigger's favorite cousin BB, and Tigger, sat silently and cried, all grandchildren, shocked.
I spent hours trying, and I reached her son. Took me an hour after the fact to remember he was assigned to a ship. Then it took all of us time to remember what ship. An aunt had written it down.
"Baby, (choke) I'm sorry, momma passed."
"What? (he didn't hear me from my sobs)
"Your mother, she passed. Baby she's gone. I'm sorry."
(phone drops, duty officer checks to see if I'm still on the line, a few moments he returns)
"Call her cell phone, LH has it. Did you hear me? She'll tell you everything."
I had to call my xhusband and tell him his mother died.
today is his birthday.
After that call, I got the number to the ER and gave it to him. I took the remaining boys (BB was picked up by his father. LH called him immediately but by the time he got there, we had just been told she passed), the cousins and TIgger and went home. We got some clothes, fed the cats and came to my place.
This woman is the closest relative I've ever lost since I was a child. When this started, I was calm, once I called her son, I started loosing it.
We mourn the passing of Lillian G.
She was damn near 60 this year. Hands down, she was the kindest lady I knew. Rarely told a person no and helped anybody she could. She did this her whole life, struggles and all. She raised 3 generations.
We still can't reach her eldest son.
I can not truly say what this woman means to her family. I can't really say what she means to me. Even after I left her son, nothing changed. She even asked to meet KN and invited him to the holiday gatherings. Wished him a happy birthday once Tigger told her. She was just that kind of a person.
Friday I woke up angry, and that day and Saturday, I've been drinking. I said, "feels like a storm is brewing." KN worried cause I have been that bothered, distracted and lost. Two fucking days all I could say was, "Something is wrong, but I don't know what."
The storm was her.