same shit as always
im in 4th period right now and its been a long day... im sleepy and for some reason my tummy hurts oh well... today we were in the gym forever and it was torture! my ass was numb from those hard ass bleachers... my mystery guy was there of course sitting next to my nemasis. I hate to say it but she gets under my skin. I cant even discribe how seeing her makes me feel and worse when shes talking to him. it drives me crazy. well lately I feel like he has me on some kind of roller coaster or hes playing tug of war with me... I dont get it. I wish that Things could just be simple between us but its not its always so complicated. why? I wish we could just be together but it seems like for some reason its never the right time for us but then when is? im tired of waiting for him. Granted in my eyes hes worth it and more but I just think its so unfair all i want is to be with him. I know that maybe I should just forget it and walk away but i cant. I've never gotten so close to having him like I have now. nineth grade was a long time ago. after that i swore it could never happen and now he even told me that he does like me. that is a big step for me. I never thought I'd live to hear him say that he does want me... hearing him say that and the way he treated me felt like a dream. so you see i cant just walk away ive come to far to let him slip out of my fingers. I refuse to lose him again. I want a chance to see once and for all what we could have... so I have to talk to him but for some reason I havent told him that we need to. I will tomarrow... hopefully im just scared of what might happen but hey i need to know either way. Its worth trying imma give it my all and if it doesnt work out how i hope it does at least I can walk away knowing I gave it all I had. i guess ill keep you updated. bye