i long to spread my wings and fly into the light

[inksmears]

leave me an anonymous comment pouring your heart out. tell me your stories, your secrets, those things no one ever asks but you wish to tell. tell me about your love, your hate, your indifference, your joy. tell me about what's inside of you when you're reading through these entries on your friends list, and tell me why you continue to come back

Comments

[anonymous]

After having my roomie molest me on multiple occasions, I caught him watching me while I sleep. I'm scared I'm going to snap soon and do something irreversible (which he will richly deserve), and no one is going to do anything about it. No one is helping me. The law is useless, the shelters are stuck down, and I've got nowhere else to go.

[inksmears]

Can you not throw him out? What about your landlord/landlady? Are they aware of this? No family or friends? There has to be something. There always has to be some way.

Anon, I would move you up here with me if I could.

[anonymous]

I swear I'm not trying to be rude here, but... this is reality. People are shit at the end of the day. No one will help me, and unless I can manage to magically turn my life around, I know I won't be able to help myself; I've been working on it for the past few years. And no, sometimes there is no way out.

Yeah, a lot of people would "do something" if they "could." (Bitterness talking; I promise it's not directed at you. ♥)

[inksmears]

I'm not expecting a miracle but I am a firm believer in 'if there is a will there is a way'. As naive and as hopelessly optimistic as it sounds it hasn't failed me yet. But in the end I don't fully know your situation. So my previous comment was probably rude. I just wish there was someone you felt comfortable enough to tell this to in your life so that you could receive help.

People say that because they don't know how to help. I sure don't. I can't offer you a new place to live, I can't give you money to find a new place, I can't call the police without knowing personal information you probably don't want to share over the internet with a stranger, I can't go over there and punch the guy in the face... I would really do anything and everything possible to help but I don't know how. It's terrible...

Is there anything I can do for you? If there is, please tell me. Honest to god.

[anonymous]

I'm sorry, but optimism doesn't help, not really. Believing things will get better, even working towards it... sometimes it just doesn't work. And there's no one. Everyone thinks he's wonderful and can do no wrong, ever, and isn't he great for taking me in when I had nowhere else to go? I'm going batshit here, I swear it. I want to hurt him (well, worse than hurt him). I want to make sure he can never touch me or anyone again.

They're full of shit, and they shouldn't spew that bull if they're not actually willing to pony up. It's insulting, it's degrading, and it hurts.

kill me.

[inksmears]

No. Fuck that guy and no, I definitely won't do that.

I will find a way to help you instead. There is a way.

[anonymous]

Just like everyone else who's said that, you mean?

Sorry. I'm sure you mean it, but I've heard it all before. There is no way anything's ever going to get any better. I don't expect anyone to do anything, really, I don't. I just don't know what to do that doesn't involve horrific and well-deserved amounts of violence. The police are useless around here.

[inksmears]

I'm not promising anything, hun. I wish I could but I can't. And I admit I know shit about how to go about helping someone this way let alone someone on the internet who lives on the other side of the country.

But there has to be something so I'm going to try.

[anonymous]

Don't bother. Really. I don't need "try," and I definitely don't need false hope again. Thanks anyway, though.

[inksmears]

Just hang in there. I'm sorry it's shallow but it's all I can think of to say.

[anonymous]

Yeah, no. That's trite, and it's insulting. Please don't say such things. It's degrading to us both.

[inksmears]

Then tell me what I should say instead.

[anonymous]

It's really not your duty, and it's unfair to even say it; I know it is. I just needed one moment when I could say it instead of keeping it inside and smiling, and acting like a happy idiot. And I don't know. Just please don't pretend that anything's ever going to be alright, because it's not and I know it. I know you're only trying to help, but really , I don't think anything can help any more.

[inksmears]

As a friend I feel it really is my duty. What kind of friend sits there while someone they care for admits such dreadful things? Shouldn't friends at least try and try and try for another until they can try no more? But in the end, if nothing else, this post is hear for you to air it all out. If I really can offer nothing else then I can at least offer that.

I'm not pretending that everything is okay. When you finally get out of this awful situation it still won't be okay. I know that. I'm not that naive.

[anonymous]

A true friend doesn't, no. And sometimes - hell, a lot of the time - there's nothing they can do. And when that happens, it's not their fault, and it sure as hell isn't yours. And I agree with your idea of what friends should do, but true friendship is as rare as the proverbial unicorn.

It wasn't my intention to imply that you were, and I'm truly sorry if that's how I came across. And thank you. I know you're only trying to help.

[inksmears]

Yeah... fair enough.

Oh, no, you weren't! I was just... emphasizing I guess.