(no subject)
The following is an open letter to all the people this week who have confirmed my belief that the human race's defining quality is stupidity.
Dear All,
To the customers I served during my two shifts:
1. That thing I have given you is called a MENU. It is there for a reason. It tells you what we serve. Please read it before asking for an omelette.
2. I am a WAITRESS. This means a) I am NOT psychic. If you don't ask for your eggs well done, I will not tell the chefs, and your eggs will be runny.
b) I do not own the restaurant. This means that when I say "We do not stock ham" it isn't my fault. The OWNER makes that choice, so don't death stare me.
3. I can't speak to 6 people at once. Really, I can't. So if I am taking another person's order, and you walk in, and I ask you to be seated, please do not call out for service. I will get to you. Please wait.
4. If your 4 year old daughter throws her pancake across the restaurant, this isn't my fault. It is your fault for letting her throw a tantrum, and your fault for ordering something with strawberries on it, when your daughter doesn't like them. Do not give me a dirty look. I now have to hurry to your table to see if everything is ok, clean up a mess, and make 4 other tables WAIT A LITTLE LONGER!
To the dickhead P- platers who cruise through town:
1. The 40 km/h speed limit is there for a reason. If you go 60, you will probably hit something. If it's me, I'll sue your ass. Slow the fuck down, you do not look cool, or even resemble cool. Assholes.
To the idiots who call me everyday when I'm working at Dad's:
1. Big city lawyers take note. Living in the country does not make us dumb. If you lie to us, we can report you for malpractice. We probably will.
2. Coming from the city does not make you any busier or more important than us. If I say Dad is busy/ with a client/ on a call, he CAN'T SPEAK TO YOU. I am not making it up. I will take a message, and you can wait. He will get back to you.
3. If you send us a fax (local firms take note) and it doesn't come through properly, don't send it again, ring to see what we got. We do not need seven copies of pages one to four. Really.
Finally, to all:
STOP BEING STUPID!!!
Lots of Love...
Ink.
Dear All,
To the customers I served during my two shifts:
1. That thing I have given you is called a MENU. It is there for a reason. It tells you what we serve. Please read it before asking for an omelette.
2. I am a WAITRESS. This means a) I am NOT psychic. If you don't ask for your eggs well done, I will not tell the chefs, and your eggs will be runny.
b) I do not own the restaurant. This means that when I say "We do not stock ham" it isn't my fault. The OWNER makes that choice, so don't death stare me.
3. I can't speak to 6 people at once. Really, I can't. So if I am taking another person's order, and you walk in, and I ask you to be seated, please do not call out for service. I will get to you. Please wait.
4. If your 4 year old daughter throws her pancake across the restaurant, this isn't my fault. It is your fault for letting her throw a tantrum, and your fault for ordering something with strawberries on it, when your daughter doesn't like them. Do not give me a dirty look. I now have to hurry to your table to see if everything is ok, clean up a mess, and make 4 other tables WAIT A LITTLE LONGER!
To the dickhead P- platers who cruise through town:
1. The 40 km/h speed limit is there for a reason. If you go 60, you will probably hit something. If it's me, I'll sue your ass. Slow the fuck down, you do not look cool, or even resemble cool. Assholes.
To the idiots who call me everyday when I'm working at Dad's:
1. Big city lawyers take note. Living in the country does not make us dumb. If you lie to us, we can report you for malpractice. We probably will.
2. Coming from the city does not make you any busier or more important than us. If I say Dad is busy/ with a client/ on a call, he CAN'T SPEAK TO YOU. I am not making it up. I will take a message, and you can wait. He will get back to you.
3. If you send us a fax (local firms take note) and it doesn't come through properly, don't send it again, ring to see what we got. We do not need seven copies of pages one to four. Really.
Finally, to all:
STOP BEING STUPID!!!
Lots of Love...
Ink.