weekly update
Not much has happened this week, really. Been workin my ass off. I work 3 12's a week and 1 8 hour shift as well. I realize that most other people work that many hours a week too but for some reason, I'm freakin exhausted on my days off. Granted, I typically only get 1 day off at a time which full on, without a date, blows! I'm workin tonight and tomorrow night (7p-7a) and I have Monday and Tuesday off. YAY!! Tuesday, I gotta take my car into the shop cuz the rear wheel bearings are goin out. Joy of fuckin joys!
Wait...wasn't I updating on what has happened not what is TO happen? lordymorty! Gingko and I might need to become better than just name-callin kinda friends.
I had a really good talk with a friend of mine and came to a few realizations. I have always been a runner in the relationship sense of the word. I get involved, things get rough, I make the problems my fault and bail. TAH DAH! Problem solved. Well, sorta. The problem involving me not actually FEELING what was wrong remains. And, in order to continue to not deal with the feelings/emotions/whatever, I throw myself into work. (note: 6 day work week last week...hmm) I have made a lot of progress in being able to communicate with others, romantically-involved or not, and I continue to move forward with that.
What I realized during my chat with a couple of good friends is that I've ALWAYS been the stronger person(ality) in a relationship (with the exception of 1 and it's a mutual thing...*muah to Jules*) and when it came time to be in a relationship where I wasn't the stronger person and I realized that was going to change, I freaked out! OMG! I bailed...didn't discuss it with that person, didn't try to work it out, just fuckin blazed outta there. Nice, right? *shrug* Luckily, this person was/is willing to listen to me and is helping me understand it all while helping them understand it too. It's a good thing.
I'm considering goin to Oregon this spring to see my best femme friend, Vonni. It'll be a surprise for her. Our other best friend, Rob, (gayest straight man you'll ever meet!) might go too. She'll FREAK OUT! It'll be wonderful *hehehe* I've already planned a trip to Minnesota in May and VegasBayBee in October (butch-femme bash). Seriously considering goin to Tulsa for that tattoo convention that Steve posted about earlier this week. We'll see. Hopefully I'll have my 1/4 sleeve done by then and I'll be bold enough to enter a contest with it.
Ok...off I go to the working place to care for my old folks. I am lookin forward to the hugs and cheek smooches I get every day I work. That, in itself, makes it all worth it sometimes.