the opposite of war
I've been searching in vain for an outlet, any outlet, to quell this restlessness. Whenever I get too comfortable with life, I get antsy. In the past, a combination of LJ blogging, writing fanfic and origific, reading fanfic, and scrapbooking have all helped, but lately nothing seems to stick.
Our apartment is in a perpetual state of messiness, which I think contributes to my anxiety. I started cleaning the bedroom today, and am taking ten minute breaks now and then so that I don't overwhelm myself with this seemingly insurmountable task. I had told myself that I would do the entire apartment in one go, but that's not happening. I'm sick of it being so cluttered and collegey and temporary. I'm sick of it in general and specifically. I want a house. I want a place that feels like home, that feels permanent, that doesn't feel like a long transition. I know it will come some day - hopefully - but I am just tired of throwing our money at our landlord, instead of investing it in something for years to come.
I may attempt quilting again, but I still run into the same problem of not owning a sewing machine, and not having the patience to practice hand-quilting. I guess you have to start somewhere.
Ultimately, I've been remarkably blah lately. I really need to figure out how to appreciate what I have, and let myself blossom within my current situation.
Our apartment is in a perpetual state of messiness, which I think contributes to my anxiety. I started cleaning the bedroom today, and am taking ten minute breaks now and then so that I don't overwhelm myself with this seemingly insurmountable task. I had told myself that I would do the entire apartment in one go, but that's not happening. I'm sick of it being so cluttered and collegey and temporary. I'm sick of it in general and specifically. I want a house. I want a place that feels like home, that feels permanent, that doesn't feel like a long transition. I know it will come some day - hopefully - but I am just tired of throwing our money at our landlord, instead of investing it in something for years to come.
I may attempt quilting again, but I still run into the same problem of not owning a sewing machine, and not having the patience to practice hand-quilting. I guess you have to start somewhere.
Ultimately, I've been remarkably blah lately. I really need to figure out how to appreciate what I have, and let myself blossom within my current situation.