May 05, 2004 11:23
Obviously, I made it back from the mountain alive and am now thrust back into the gut of work-y world. Sorry to folks who asked about the beard: I never got a good picture of it. The first day it was pale blue at the sideburns and pale green for the rest. Joe said I looked like an easter egg. So, we put dark purple over the whole thing. I had intended to take a pic when I got home, but it has now faded to a faint, faint blue that can hardly be seen 'cept in certain light. Oh well ... next year?
Several of the days were incredibly rainy. Joe and I had a new tent, though, with MUCH more room (and a small porch) so space and cover was much less an issue. The outset of the Beltane gathering was small and quiet, a good rest. We hiked a lot, went into the neighboring town a couple of times (for demon fast food), helped with a few chores. Mostly sat around and gabbed, smoked, drank some.
This year was different than last. Last year seemed a party crash course in Faeriedom -- drugs and leering, in-your-face costume. This year I actually got to MEET folks, wander more on my own, feel more at home there. Talked to some new folks like Fido and Ilex (nice to meet you, Bub!) and got to know some former acquaintances more (like Nemo). Not to say the week was substance-free, of course; it just wasn't as much the focus.
The problem is that you find yourself free for a week, shoulder to shoulder with freaks of similar value, and you come back to weeks of Mondays, money concerns, constricted patterns. You feel false and frustrated. I noticed that last year at this time I felt compelled to re-write my goals and values. Think I'll do that again in the next couple of days, set myself back towards where I want to be, spring awake from a sleepy winter.
And I feel the fuller for it ... despite passing problems with re-adaptation.
Squint!
queerness,
faeries,
facial hair,
change,
vacation,
relationships