And in that defeaning pleasure I thought I heard someone say, "If we walk away, they'll walk away."
Today I have ashes on my head and a hole in my heart.
But I think I'm happy...I don't know. Sometimes it's hard to tell.
First of all, it must be said that I adore Neil. He is someone that continues to astound and surprise me and I wish I knew him as well I want to know him. But, at any rate, he made my Monday night just by complimenting me. I really needed it. He's honestly one of the greatest people I know. Without trying to be more eloquent, that is what I have to say about him.
Tuesday was a damn good day. Late arrival is always a wonderful thing. I woke up before my alarm and it was gray outside but it was the sort of a day that seemed like it should be gray, and not in a bad way, and I listened to Guster in my bed before getting up.
Carrying on a now two-week-old tradition of dinner/American Idol/Real World night, Heather, Matt, Mike, and I hung out. We went to Baker's Square and in the car Mike was bitching about how Matt bugs him so I told him to stop his bitching. Then we ate dinner, sharing chicken strips and a cheddar bacon chicken sandwich thing. Gooood food. Our waitress thanked us for being the nicest teenagers she's dealt with in a long while. On the drive home, both Matt and Mike were acting like spazzes and we discussed what it would be like if we all went on a road trip together. Back at Heather's house, we watched American Idol, Matt and I did our Calculus homework, and then we watched Real World. And afterwards all hell broke lose...or rather, we started acting like five year olds and just started beating on each other. I'm totally serious. Matt made fun of the way I fight but I was just trying to protect myself from him tickling me. Matt and Mike ended up tickling both Heather and me mercilessly. It was a good time, in the most banal of ways. I didn't horse around that much as a kid; who knew I'd start at eighteen? Matt and Mike finally left around ten, but I stayed around and Heather and me held a discussion while using various accents, to the great amusement of ourselves. We are seriously the biggest dorks ever. Words cannot do justice to the amount of crazyness/dorkyness that took place last night. Suffice it to say, we acted like we were drunk, but we weren't. Insanity.
And today I'm just...eh. I'm having emotional issues, but I'm trying to keep those interalized. I accompanied Heather to church and got ashes. I'm highly amused by the fact that my heathen self stepped into a church and got ashes. Now we're going to get milkshakes and then we're off to the play at school. And then I need to get some sleep because I've been lacking in that department as of late. Dios mio...
But I think I'm happy...I don't know. Sometimes it's hard to tell.
First of all, it must be said that I adore Neil. He is someone that continues to astound and surprise me and I wish I knew him as well I want to know him. But, at any rate, he made my Monday night just by complimenting me. I really needed it. He's honestly one of the greatest people I know. Without trying to be more eloquent, that is what I have to say about him.
Tuesday was a damn good day. Late arrival is always a wonderful thing. I woke up before my alarm and it was gray outside but it was the sort of a day that seemed like it should be gray, and not in a bad way, and I listened to Guster in my bed before getting up.
Carrying on a now two-week-old tradition of dinner/American Idol/Real World night, Heather, Matt, Mike, and I hung out. We went to Baker's Square and in the car Mike was bitching about how Matt bugs him so I told him to stop his bitching. Then we ate dinner, sharing chicken strips and a cheddar bacon chicken sandwich thing. Gooood food. Our waitress thanked us for being the nicest teenagers she's dealt with in a long while. On the drive home, both Matt and Mike were acting like spazzes and we discussed what it would be like if we all went on a road trip together. Back at Heather's house, we watched American Idol, Matt and I did our Calculus homework, and then we watched Real World. And afterwards all hell broke lose...or rather, we started acting like five year olds and just started beating on each other. I'm totally serious. Matt made fun of the way I fight but I was just trying to protect myself from him tickling me. Matt and Mike ended up tickling both Heather and me mercilessly. It was a good time, in the most banal of ways. I didn't horse around that much as a kid; who knew I'd start at eighteen? Matt and Mike finally left around ten, but I stayed around and Heather and me held a discussion while using various accents, to the great amusement of ourselves. We are seriously the biggest dorks ever. Words cannot do justice to the amount of crazyness/dorkyness that took place last night. Suffice it to say, we acted like we were drunk, but we weren't. Insanity.
And today I'm just...eh. I'm having emotional issues, but I'm trying to keep those interalized. I accompanied Heather to church and got ashes. I'm highly amused by the fact that my heathen self stepped into a church and got ashes. Now we're going to get milkshakes and then we're off to the play at school. And then I need to get some sleep because I've been lacking in that department as of late. Dios mio...