Ladies Night (Stargates / Firefly) gen
Written for: tielan for fandom_stocking, a comm where folks were encouraged to create short things for holiday presents
Fandoms: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1, Firefly
Also: Gen. Rather cliched. But she'd said: "I tend to prefer the female characters of any show. Really specifically, my favourites are Teyla Emmagan of Atlantis, Sam Carter of SG1, Inara Serra from Firefly, [...]" and my brain immediately coughed this up.
It could have been any bar in any city on Earth, except that the fruit-based drinks didn't have little umbrellas in them and the animal head over the doorway had more rows of teeth than any beast on earth save, maybe, a shark. Oh, and Earth was another galaxy over.
But otherwise it looked like your standard drinking establishment - long wooden bar that ran most of the length of one wall, and solid tables and chairs filled up most of the floor. Tonight, most every seat at the tables and the bar were filled, and the room was wall to wall women, including the three bartenders. This was the Third Moon Night, Harvah Shanonan, which roughly translated to Ladies Night.
Another look at the head above the door made her shudder at the idea of meeting all those teeth on solid ground, but then the idea of a literal land-shark reminded her of the old Saturday Night Live skit, and she let slip a giggle.
"Everything ok, Sam?" Vala asked, with a concerned look.
"Candygram!" Sam replied and quickly took another drink, lest she start giggling flat out. She should slow down, these drinks were potent. She thought about the guys, holed up at the inn, not allowed outside on this special, segregated evening. She thought about how well the folks from her old team were mixing with her new command. She thought she needed another drink.
"Colonel Carter," Teyla said, with her typical formality, "May I say that you seem... preoccupied? Perhaps you should relax a bit. Do your people not have a long established relationship with this world?"
"You're absolutely right, Teyla," Sam said, "and, for crying out loud, call me Sam, will you?" She stood up, a bit wobbly, and grabbed her cup, stating, "I'm going for another. Any of you want more?"
"Perhaps you would let me? Sam?" Teyla gently removed the cup from Sam's hand as Vala wobbled her back into a chair. Teyla grabbed the other two cups and headed to the bar.
"I'm very sorry, I'm not making any appointments right now," said a beautiful woman to the woman next to her. "If you leave a message with my regular contact I will get back to you as soon as possible."
The second woman was apparently not taking no for an answer, and Teyla could see the frustration mounting in the first woman's deep, dark eyes. As a bartender came over, she asked for the refills, and then was struck with inspiration. "It IS you," she cried, placing a hand on the beautiful woman's arm, gently touching the soft flowing fabric that seemed to surround and add to the beauty. "I'm so glad you could make it! Would you come join the rest of us?"
"But of course!" exclaimed the beautiful woman, relief obvious in her eyes, "I had hoped we would meet tonight. Would you please excuse us?" she said the latter to the pestering woman, now flabbergasted at being abandonded, and then followed Teyla back to the table.
"Please, sit, join us," Teyla said, pulling a chair out for the newcomer. "I hope you do not mind, Sam, Vala, but she seemed to need some rescuing."
"Yes, thank you. I normally prefer female clients but - oh! that woman was so pushy! I don't like doing business when I'm trying to relax."
"Well, you're more than welcome to join us, more the merrier, they say, right? I am Vala, and this is Sam, and you have already met Teyla."
"Thank you again for the rescue, Teyla, and thank you for welcoming me. My name is-"
"INARA, there you are!" The newcomer was wearing some kind of jumpsuit, looking a little less refined than her friend, but the smile on her face seemed to light up the room. "I'm so sorry I'm late," she continued, waving her own drink about, "I just had to finish adjusting that condensor coil. You know how fussy the engines can be."
"It's ok, Kaylee." Inara got her friend settled and introductions were made again.
A companionable silence sat over them for a moment as they sipped their drinks, which was bound not to last long.
"So! Are you two from this place?" Vala asked with the drink adding to her usual cheer.
"No, no, we're just here for business," Inara replied.
"Like you were talking about up at the bar?" Sam blurted out loud. Ooops. She really did need to slow down on the drinks.
Inara, however, was not offended. "That's not the primary business of our ship, but I do what I can around the ... Captain's schedule." The last came out with a wry look.
"Captain's as like as not to get a bug up his butt about needing to rush off here or there," Kaylee said solemnly, though by now she was wobbling in her chair, too. "He doesn't respect you enough, Inara. Men!"
Teyla's eyebrow raised above her hairline. "Do they not have their purposes?"
The women sat quietly for a brief moment, then all burst out laughing.
"As if they ever really listen to us," Vala groused.
"Oh, they listen," Teyla countered, "They just don't pay attention. It goes in their ears but falls right back out again."
Kaylee's eyes weren't completely tracking Teyla's face, and she was somehow managing to weave in her seat. "You mean, you mean... you mean, like, 'In one ear and out the other,' yeah?" She took another swallow from her cup. "They have their purpose all right. When they're not trying to crash the ship you just put back together."
"Or doing something that means we have to leave before half your appointments are kept."
"Or touching things they should not."
"Or constantly losing their pants."
Sam thought about men - the ones she had commanded, the ones who had commanded her, the ones who had tried to control her life, the ones who had tried to insist she live in a white picket fence ideal, the ones who had -
She raised her cup and loudly announced, "To men! To them not being here, and to a night just for us!"
"Hear, hear!" "Amen!" "Hell, yeah!" "Indeed."
Without asking, Vala scooped up their empty mugs and weaved and wobbled her way back up to the bar.
In the morning, the men would not be so forgiving of their hangovers, but for tonight, it was Harvah Shonanan.
Fandoms: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1, Firefly
Also: Gen. Rather cliched. But she'd said: "I tend to prefer the female characters of any show. Really specifically, my favourites are Teyla Emmagan of Atlantis, Sam Carter of SG1, Inara Serra from Firefly, [...]" and my brain immediately coughed this up.
It could have been any bar in any city on Earth, except that the fruit-based drinks didn't have little umbrellas in them and the animal head over the doorway had more rows of teeth than any beast on earth save, maybe, a shark. Oh, and Earth was another galaxy over.
But otherwise it looked like your standard drinking establishment - long wooden bar that ran most of the length of one wall, and solid tables and chairs filled up most of the floor. Tonight, most every seat at the tables and the bar were filled, and the room was wall to wall women, including the three bartenders. This was the Third Moon Night, Harvah Shanonan, which roughly translated to Ladies Night.
Another look at the head above the door made her shudder at the idea of meeting all those teeth on solid ground, but then the idea of a literal land-shark reminded her of the old Saturday Night Live skit, and she let slip a giggle.
"Everything ok, Sam?" Vala asked, with a concerned look.
"Candygram!" Sam replied and quickly took another drink, lest she start giggling flat out. She should slow down, these drinks were potent. She thought about the guys, holed up at the inn, not allowed outside on this special, segregated evening. She thought about how well the folks from her old team were mixing with her new command. She thought she needed another drink.
"Colonel Carter," Teyla said, with her typical formality, "May I say that you seem... preoccupied? Perhaps you should relax a bit. Do your people not have a long established relationship with this world?"
"You're absolutely right, Teyla," Sam said, "and, for crying out loud, call me Sam, will you?" She stood up, a bit wobbly, and grabbed her cup, stating, "I'm going for another. Any of you want more?"
"Perhaps you would let me? Sam?" Teyla gently removed the cup from Sam's hand as Vala wobbled her back into a chair. Teyla grabbed the other two cups and headed to the bar.
"I'm very sorry, I'm not making any appointments right now," said a beautiful woman to the woman next to her. "If you leave a message with my regular contact I will get back to you as soon as possible."
The second woman was apparently not taking no for an answer, and Teyla could see the frustration mounting in the first woman's deep, dark eyes. As a bartender came over, she asked for the refills, and then was struck with inspiration. "It IS you," she cried, placing a hand on the beautiful woman's arm, gently touching the soft flowing fabric that seemed to surround and add to the beauty. "I'm so glad you could make it! Would you come join the rest of us?"
"But of course!" exclaimed the beautiful woman, relief obvious in her eyes, "I had hoped we would meet tonight. Would you please excuse us?" she said the latter to the pestering woman, now flabbergasted at being abandonded, and then followed Teyla back to the table.
"Please, sit, join us," Teyla said, pulling a chair out for the newcomer. "I hope you do not mind, Sam, Vala, but she seemed to need some rescuing."
"Yes, thank you. I normally prefer female clients but - oh! that woman was so pushy! I don't like doing business when I'm trying to relax."
"Well, you're more than welcome to join us, more the merrier, they say, right? I am Vala, and this is Sam, and you have already met Teyla."
"Thank you again for the rescue, Teyla, and thank you for welcoming me. My name is-"
"INARA, there you are!" The newcomer was wearing some kind of jumpsuit, looking a little less refined than her friend, but the smile on her face seemed to light up the room. "I'm so sorry I'm late," she continued, waving her own drink about, "I just had to finish adjusting that condensor coil. You know how fussy the engines can be."
"It's ok, Kaylee." Inara got her friend settled and introductions were made again.
A companionable silence sat over them for a moment as they sipped their drinks, which was bound not to last long.
"So! Are you two from this place?" Vala asked with the drink adding to her usual cheer.
"No, no, we're just here for business," Inara replied.
"Like you were talking about up at the bar?" Sam blurted out loud. Ooops. She really did need to slow down on the drinks.
Inara, however, was not offended. "That's not the primary business of our ship, but I do what I can around the ... Captain's schedule." The last came out with a wry look.
"Captain's as like as not to get a bug up his butt about needing to rush off here or there," Kaylee said solemnly, though by now she was wobbling in her chair, too. "He doesn't respect you enough, Inara. Men!"
Teyla's eyebrow raised above her hairline. "Do they not have their purposes?"
The women sat quietly for a brief moment, then all burst out laughing.
"As if they ever really listen to us," Vala groused.
"Oh, they listen," Teyla countered, "They just don't pay attention. It goes in their ears but falls right back out again."
Kaylee's eyes weren't completely tracking Teyla's face, and she was somehow managing to weave in her seat. "You mean, you mean... you mean, like, 'In one ear and out the other,' yeah?" She took another swallow from her cup. "They have their purpose all right. When they're not trying to crash the ship you just put back together."
"Or doing something that means we have to leave before half your appointments are kept."
"Or touching things they should not."
"Or constantly losing their pants."
Sam thought about men - the ones she had commanded, the ones who had commanded her, the ones who had tried to control her life, the ones who had tried to insist she live in a white picket fence ideal, the ones who had -
She raised her cup and loudly announced, "To men! To them not being here, and to a night just for us!"
"Hear, hear!" "Amen!" "Hell, yeah!" "Indeed."
Without asking, Vala scooped up their empty mugs and weaved and wobbled her way back up to the bar.
In the morning, the men would not be so forgiving of their hangovers, but for tonight, it was Harvah Shonanan.