Temporarily Eternal
I wasn't online much last night. Mostly I sat on the couch, drank a few beers, and saw myself in a car... the car was mine. I was able to go anywhere I wanted, but mostly I was appreciative that I had a place that actually felt like a room, my own box, enclosed, and encapsulated. Where did I drive to? Well, I didn't. I sat in the driver's seat, engine off, resting at the edge of a cliff; where I sat was where it all began. It was beautiful and overlooking an entire city... I'm not sure what city, probably the City of the All. There was contemplation. Should I start the car? Maybe play some music? Throw it from Park into Drive, experience the plight of the lemming? Nah. I kept the atmosphere silent. And motionless. Plugged my ears with mum back on the couch, though the car was quite silent... and I closed my eyes in that car whilst staring at everything.
And I dreamed. In color. Gorgeous, vivid, and endless, they were; it is a rarity for me to be able to recall such things. I can tell you that all of you were there. I can tell you that I loved and was loved in return. And I can tell you that I experienced nothing short of magic. And I awoke.
When I woke up there was a single message on my phone, around noon. It was from my mother. She was giving me numbers of doctors and such... and as the message ended, I was presented with the mysterious lady's voice that always talks to me at the end of each message, telling me that I needed to press 7 to delete the message, or possibly I could press 9 and save the message for 14 days. Disposable communication. Everytime the mystery lady tells me this I feel a pit swell in my stomach. Someone called me, obviously showing that they care by doing so, and my only options are to delete that caring now... or 14 days from now.
It's very symbolic of life when you think about it. We're all sitting in cars on cliffs staring at the sun, the clouds, the glistening dew on waving grasses, and the City of the All spread out before us. Disposable things in a disposable moment.
This is something I've recognized for a long, long while.
It makes me happy and it deeply saddens me.
This, though... this is life.
Don't question it.
Become aware that you are Aware.
Embrace and be embraced in this, this temporarily eternal moment.
That is all.
And I dreamed. In color. Gorgeous, vivid, and endless, they were; it is a rarity for me to be able to recall such things. I can tell you that all of you were there. I can tell you that I loved and was loved in return. And I can tell you that I experienced nothing short of magic. And I awoke.
When I woke up there was a single message on my phone, around noon. It was from my mother. She was giving me numbers of doctors and such... and as the message ended, I was presented with the mysterious lady's voice that always talks to me at the end of each message, telling me that I needed to press 7 to delete the message, or possibly I could press 9 and save the message for 14 days. Disposable communication. Everytime the mystery lady tells me this I feel a pit swell in my stomach. Someone called me, obviously showing that they care by doing so, and my only options are to delete that caring now... or 14 days from now.
It's very symbolic of life when you think about it. We're all sitting in cars on cliffs staring at the sun, the clouds, the glistening dew on waving grasses, and the City of the All spread out before us. Disposable things in a disposable moment.
This is something I've recognized for a long, long while.
It makes me happy and it deeply saddens me.
This, though... this is life.
Don't question it.
Become aware that you are Aware.
Embrace and be embraced in this, this temporarily eternal moment.
That is all.