When Bored, think of Nonsensical Replies to Questions asked @ CNY

[inex]

You know I have been watching too much Whose Line when I come up with a post like this.

Scenes from a Hat:

Unlikely Responses to People who ask you when You plan to have kids:

1: The stocks aren't delivering babies, they have been retrenched
2: Our libidos have plunged, just like the stock market
3: As soon as we find a surrogate mother. You wanna volunteer?
4: Too much melamine in milk powder these days.

Irritated Replies from Jobless People when asked when they are gonna get a job:

1: As soon as you got fired
2: As soon as I buried my ex- boss, I'm not quite sure if he's dead yet from the rat poison I put in his coffee daily
3: I'm waiting for the CEO of your company to retire
4: I'm too traumatized by my retrenchment to find another job

What Single People are tempted to say when Asked about their Singlehood

1: Meet my imaginery girlfriend, Mimi
2: Meet my imaginery boyfriend, John
3: I'm gay and your son looks good. 
4: I'm lesbian and you are looking damn good

What Dating Couples are dying to say when Asked if they are planning matrimony

1: Sure, as soon as we rob the bank for our wedding fund. We planned to frame you!
2: no no, elopement is so much more fun.
3: when you stop asking