hopeless goofball seeks insatiable slut
Yeah, I'm horny and I want sex but before we get into that I want to make one thing clear first. About 2 months back I posted a joke that had to do with this category because it was hilarious and I thought others would like it. Along with some laughter, I got 4 bots posting me links supposedly trying to pass themselves off as actual women.
I've got a couple rules for replies here:
1) Do not send me links to websites or profiles elsewhere, unless it's livejournal. At least on LJ I can interact with someone enough to tell if they're the real deal.
2) Don't send me to 'age verification sites'. I know they're not real and they're just trying to get credit card info.
That's it.
I'm 39 years old and I have been since November 24th. Stand 6'2" and weight in about 208 lbs. on a good day. I'm in decent shape but I'm no athlete, I've got a gut. I don't think I'm much more than cute but I've been with women who have told me I'm quite handsome. They may've been blind but that's what I can tell you so far as the opinions of others.
Sexually, I don't believe there's any such thing as too much sex. I'm straight and am only interested in women, not men that think they can get me off just as well. Nothing personal guys but no matter how good you are with your hands or your mouths, you just don't do it for me. Also, for those of you who aren't exactly male anymore, I prefer my women naturally born...
...if you were born a woman trapped in a man's body and through the wonders of medical science you're now a woman, more power to you but I'm not interested.
As to my physical sex stats, in all honesty I'm hung about average. Most of the women I've been with seem to think I'm huge. I think they all have poor depth perception. I will agree that I'm quite thick, 5½" around (not across) and I suspect the stretching potential here may be what makes women think I'm so big.
That's just a guesstimate though.
I'm local to Palo Alto and I live in an RV. I can host but let's be clear, the place is kind of a mess; too much stuff with too few places to put it. According to my friend Rebecca, who is sadly not that kind of friend, at least it doesn't smell bad. So, if you can handle that we should be good to go...
...although it's possible that depending how intense the sex is we may cause a number of avalanches.
We may meet elsewhere prior to anything happening, which would also be good for food. Don't expect a fancy meal. Not so much that I'm cheap (though I kinda am) as I'm a restaurant for special occasions only kind of guy.
What I'm looking for:
You should be a woman, naturally born with all that entails. I'm not in great shape so you don't have to be either but I'd prefer you weigh less than me by 40 to 50 pounds or so. If you don't recall, my weight is listed a few paragraphs above this. Body art and/or tattoos are appreciated but not necessary, I don't have any. I'm not obsessed with big breasts but I would like that you have breasts.
Preferrably no more than 2.
I'm not greatly concerned with blowjobs, like them but they're not necessary. I'm of the mind that if a woman really likes to give them then I don't need to ask. You don't wander down there then that's okay by me. I do love to go down but you'll need to pass a brief taste test, I don't like your flavor then I'm not likely to dine on you more than once. Be advised.
Along those lines, I'd like you to be shaved or, at least, trimmed.
Please include a pic or 2 of yourself, don't need to be naked and clothes will give me a better sense of who you are anyway. A face shot is a must! Please include your height and weight with your response, don't need your age but you had better be above the age of consent. I've been with women older than me and younger, age isn't an issue.
One other thing, have a lot of stamina. I don't generally orgasm during sex (still fun for me) and I'm the kind of guy that can last until I orgasm. You will orgasm a lot, it's a knack I have, thru a number of means. Nothing too unusual, I'm just really good with my hands and mouth. Well, there's a slim chance you may not cum a lot. A former lady love of mine had the same problem orgasming that I do but that was cool, we'd spend hours not cumming together.
Tried to be as thorough as possible here. Wanted something better than "come on over wearing something easy to get out of". Hope to hear from the horny and willing among you sometime soon.
Do they allow animated pics on craigslist?
I've got a couple rules for replies here:
1) Do not send me links to websites or profiles elsewhere, unless it's livejournal. At least on LJ I can interact with someone enough to tell if they're the real deal.
2) Don't send me to 'age verification sites'. I know they're not real and they're just trying to get credit card info.
That's it.
I'm 39 years old and I have been since November 24th. Stand 6'2" and weight in about 208 lbs. on a good day. I'm in decent shape but I'm no athlete, I've got a gut. I don't think I'm much more than cute but I've been with women who have told me I'm quite handsome. They may've been blind but that's what I can tell you so far as the opinions of others.
Sexually, I don't believe there's any such thing as too much sex. I'm straight and am only interested in women, not men that think they can get me off just as well. Nothing personal guys but no matter how good you are with your hands or your mouths, you just don't do it for me. Also, for those of you who aren't exactly male anymore, I prefer my women naturally born...
...if you were born a woman trapped in a man's body and through the wonders of medical science you're now a woman, more power to you but I'm not interested.
As to my physical sex stats, in all honesty I'm hung about average. Most of the women I've been with seem to think I'm huge. I think they all have poor depth perception. I will agree that I'm quite thick, 5½" around (not across) and I suspect the stretching potential here may be what makes women think I'm so big.
That's just a guesstimate though.
I'm local to Palo Alto and I live in an RV. I can host but let's be clear, the place is kind of a mess; too much stuff with too few places to put it. According to my friend Rebecca, who is sadly not that kind of friend, at least it doesn't smell bad. So, if you can handle that we should be good to go...
...although it's possible that depending how intense the sex is we may cause a number of avalanches.
We may meet elsewhere prior to anything happening, which would also be good for food. Don't expect a fancy meal. Not so much that I'm cheap (though I kinda am) as I'm a restaurant for special occasions only kind of guy.
What I'm looking for:
You should be a woman, naturally born with all that entails. I'm not in great shape so you don't have to be either but I'd prefer you weigh less than me by 40 to 50 pounds or so. If you don't recall, my weight is listed a few paragraphs above this. Body art and/or tattoos are appreciated but not necessary, I don't have any. I'm not obsessed with big breasts but I would like that you have breasts.
Preferrably no more than 2.
I'm not greatly concerned with blowjobs, like them but they're not necessary. I'm of the mind that if a woman really likes to give them then I don't need to ask. You don't wander down there then that's okay by me. I do love to go down but you'll need to pass a brief taste test, I don't like your flavor then I'm not likely to dine on you more than once. Be advised.
Along those lines, I'd like you to be shaved or, at least, trimmed.
Please include a pic or 2 of yourself, don't need to be naked and clothes will give me a better sense of who you are anyway. A face shot is a must! Please include your height and weight with your response, don't need your age but you had better be above the age of consent. I've been with women older than me and younger, age isn't an issue.
One other thing, have a lot of stamina. I don't generally orgasm during sex (still fun for me) and I'm the kind of guy that can last until I orgasm. You will orgasm a lot, it's a knack I have, thru a number of means. Nothing too unusual, I'm just really good with my hands and mouth. Well, there's a slim chance you may not cum a lot. A former lady love of mine had the same problem orgasming that I do but that was cool, we'd spend hours not cumming together.
Tried to be as thorough as possible here. Wanted something better than "come on over wearing something easy to get out of". Hope to hear from the horny and willing among you sometime soon.
Do they allow animated pics on craigslist?