iceland
when i went to the blue lagoon with sean i rented a bathing suit from the blue lagoon company because we forgot to bring our own. it was blue. it was a one piece. it looked horrible. i use to choose to dress bad. i thought it made me unique or whatever (five years ago...cut me some slack). Then i realized the importance of maintaining a good appearance. since then i've been obsessed with fashion even though there was a time when i hated myself for liking fashion and decided i should focus on pharmacy ...that didnt work out so well. okay...so i'm in iceland...the coolest place in the wwwwwwworld. far out. swimming in the blue lagoon with the love of my life. wearing the ugliest bathing suit i've ever seen. and sean stills thinks i'm beautiful. he even says it. can you believe that? even when i'm at my worst he still thinks i'm beautiful.
when i wake up in the morning an i'm all puffy and have the sleep smell and my hair is all messed up he STILL thinks i'm beautiful.
i'm starting a partnership with my dear friend nani. the company is called malley + lee. this is going to work really well because:
1. we are both into that kind of superficial life
2. we are superficial but know a lot about life
3. we both have similar taste but also have our own flavor
4. we are both spoiled
5. we both have something to offer
-noelani meets everyone and is great in social situations and she lets me tag along. soho parties with like...25year olds who are cool and in the "business"...you know...where socialites and shit hang out. she seriously goes to all these happening parties with all these happening people. shes just really cool. like...cool in every sense. shes cool cause shes a genuinly cool person and cool because she goes to all these cool places and cool because she knows all the cool things that are COOL. so...she's the cool of malley + lee and she will keep me in the cool scene and our company in the cool scene.
so heres the deal: malley + lee...clothing...photography...design.
i cant wait. i just need to pull money out of my ass.
i was thinking about all the things i regret doing in my life. and two things popped into my head:
1. being such a bad girlfriend for such a long time to sean.
2. being such a bitch to monica.
i blame it all on umbc. not really. BUT umbc really stressed me out. i was so unhappy there and i became a bitch to just about everyone in my life. but i also blame it on myself because even though umbc contributed to my unhappiness i should have been a stronger person than i was. i should not have allowed umbc to conquer. blah. i'm a bigger and better person from it though. i've learned my lesson.
so, sorry to the girl that doesnt read my journal but i hope somehow you know i am truly sorry and that i dont wish death upon you. and your chin is cool with me.
you can be confident...you can be overly confident...you can be a god lover or a god hater...you can be cocky...you can be shy...be whatever you want. i was so ignorant before and i was convinced that i was open minded. stupid me. sorry.
and sorry to the guy who stuck with me and taught me that when things get rough the world isnt going to cuddle you and take care of you...you have to do that yourself.
i cant wait to get to new york. i'm going to have soooo much free time. which means a lot of time to skate. i wonder if nyc has skate parks?
i'll also have a lot of time to work on drumming and guitar.
i'll also have a lot of free time to go grocery shopping which is soooo much fun and often not appreciated enough as a fun thing to do.
i'll also have alot of free time to draw and do photogprahy and all sorts of art!!! i cant wait to start painting and sketching and designing again.
i'll also have a lot of free time to start volenteering again! golly miss molly.
what you have does not diminish what i have. fuck jelousy.
i now feel like i am the best girlfriend i can be. haha cocky.
when i wake up in the morning an i'm all puffy and have the sleep smell and my hair is all messed up he STILL thinks i'm beautiful.
i'm starting a partnership with my dear friend nani. the company is called malley + lee. this is going to work really well because:
1. we are both into that kind of superficial life
2. we are superficial but know a lot about life
3. we both have similar taste but also have our own flavor
4. we are both spoiled
5. we both have something to offer
-noelani meets everyone and is great in social situations and she lets me tag along. soho parties with like...25year olds who are cool and in the "business"...you know...where socialites and shit hang out. she seriously goes to all these happening parties with all these happening people. shes just really cool. like...cool in every sense. shes cool cause shes a genuinly cool person and cool because she goes to all these cool places and cool because she knows all the cool things that are COOL. so...she's the cool of malley + lee and she will keep me in the cool scene and our company in the cool scene.
so heres the deal: malley + lee...clothing...photography...design.
i cant wait. i just need to pull money out of my ass.
i was thinking about all the things i regret doing in my life. and two things popped into my head:
1. being such a bad girlfriend for such a long time to sean.
2. being such a bitch to monica.
i blame it all on umbc. not really. BUT umbc really stressed me out. i was so unhappy there and i became a bitch to just about everyone in my life. but i also blame it on myself because even though umbc contributed to my unhappiness i should have been a stronger person than i was. i should not have allowed umbc to conquer. blah. i'm a bigger and better person from it though. i've learned my lesson.
so, sorry to the girl that doesnt read my journal but i hope somehow you know i am truly sorry and that i dont wish death upon you. and your chin is cool with me.
you can be confident...you can be overly confident...you can be a god lover or a god hater...you can be cocky...you can be shy...be whatever you want. i was so ignorant before and i was convinced that i was open minded. stupid me. sorry.
and sorry to the guy who stuck with me and taught me that when things get rough the world isnt going to cuddle you and take care of you...you have to do that yourself.
i cant wait to get to new york. i'm going to have soooo much free time. which means a lot of time to skate. i wonder if nyc has skate parks?
i'll also have a lot of time to work on drumming and guitar.
i'll also have a lot of free time to go grocery shopping which is soooo much fun and often not appreciated enough as a fun thing to do.
i'll also have alot of free time to draw and do photogprahy and all sorts of art!!! i cant wait to start painting and sketching and designing again.
i'll also have a lot of free time to start volenteering again! golly miss molly.
what you have does not diminish what i have. fuck jelousy.
i now feel like i am the best girlfriend i can be. haha cocky.