(no subject)
No one can ever feel as disappointed in me as I. No one can ever lose as much confidence in me as I. No one could possibly make me feel worse as often as I.
Thursday was a shitty day.
I was feeling like shit, Newspaper was late in the day, like, the same time that I had made plans with a friend that I hadn't seen in a long time. I tried to finish the story as best as I could, but the frustration and stress from that [and everything else I've had to think about/deal with] was making me physically ill. I was sweaty, shaking and about ready to throw up all over myself a few different times. I know it wasn't the right thing to do, but I had to leave. I had to remove myself from the situation before I did something incredibly stupid. I knew that if I had stayed, I would have snapped on something rather pointless. I felt bad the entire night after I left and still felt miserable. The nervous feeling would not leave my body.
Friday, I was basically told that I didn't need to come in, since I had called and given the information wanted from an article in The Flint Journal. All I was told was that there would be a meeting "sometime," not sometime that day. If I had known it was later in the day, I would not have left with my friend. I would have stayed home. Instead, I got caught at a bad time asking if there was a way for me to get back to Fenton. Needless to say, the four hours spent at the hospital with my friend and her mother, I felt like I was about to throw up and pass out at the same time.
I can do this, I just can't handle it when people put more pressure on me in addition to what I put on myself. Things like this happen and my conscience never clears itself.
I feel like an ass and I feel like I'm going to get kicked off staff because I am now "drama."
I'm glad that one bad day can now jeopardize my entire future.
Thanks, guys. Seriously.
Thursday was a shitty day.
I was feeling like shit, Newspaper was late in the day, like, the same time that I had made plans with a friend that I hadn't seen in a long time. I tried to finish the story as best as I could, but the frustration and stress from that [and everything else I've had to think about/deal with] was making me physically ill. I was sweaty, shaking and about ready to throw up all over myself a few different times. I know it wasn't the right thing to do, but I had to leave. I had to remove myself from the situation before I did something incredibly stupid. I knew that if I had stayed, I would have snapped on something rather pointless. I felt bad the entire night after I left and still felt miserable. The nervous feeling would not leave my body.
Friday, I was basically told that I didn't need to come in, since I had called and given the information wanted from an article in The Flint Journal. All I was told was that there would be a meeting "sometime," not sometime that day. If I had known it was later in the day, I would not have left with my friend. I would have stayed home. Instead, I got caught at a bad time asking if there was a way for me to get back to Fenton. Needless to say, the four hours spent at the hospital with my friend and her mother, I felt like I was about to throw up and pass out at the same time.
I can do this, I just can't handle it when people put more pressure on me in addition to what I put on myself. Things like this happen and my conscience never clears itself.
I feel like an ass and I feel like I'm going to get kicked off staff because I am now "drama."
I'm glad that one bad day can now jeopardize my entire future.
Thanks, guys. Seriously.