So, I come with porn... I think.
So I just handed in my sn_exchange assignment a little before last week, and have been on a break from LJ ever since. It's refreshing, to say the least. Anyway, I discovered that lately I've been failing quite miserably at writing porn.
( This way to the sexy meme. )
( This way to the sexy meme. )
Naruto’s nose had crinkled up with distaste at the words when Sakura had mentioned them, and they had thought long and hard about a solution to their current dilemma - something that would be solved if only they would take Sasuke’s word for it and believe that he was, in fact, staying for good this time.
But unfortunately, Sasuke had made the mistake of asking, in utter frustration, “You idiots! Do you want me to leave again?” after being stalked to the shower, of all places, by his rather paranoid teammates, who had been suffering under the delusion that Sasuke was far gone, to the point of cutting his wrists with a rusty razor if left alone.
Naruto and Sakura felt justified in being concerned for the Uchiha’s state of mind - he must have suffered irreparable mental trauma under Orochimaru’s tutelage, and it saddened them that he was trying so hard to act normal for their sake.
Sasuke had slammed the door in their faces when they had entreated to him, in understanding tones, that he didn’t have to pretend anymore, they were here for him.
Sasuke had finally thrown them out of the house when he had caught them rifling through his underwear drawer, just to see if he had hidden some potentially sharp, dangerous object with which he could cut himself.
Now, as they sat outside in the chill winter night, Naruto scratched his head, trying to come up with a way to keep Sasuke under their watch at all times (preferably one that wouldn’t induce Sasuke to glare murderously at them), and Sakura merely sighed as she wracked her brain for a suitable solution.
Spying hadn’t been effective - Sasuke had flung a whole batch of kunai (which they had later confiscated by pulling rank) at them when they had tried to look into his window (while he was changing) from the tree branch adjacent. Tying Sasuke up and gagging him in the basement had seemed like a good plan, but then they’d feel bad about taking advantage of him while he was down, with his chakra sealed and body still recovering. Threatening Sasuke with fangirls (Naruto’s idea, not hers) was too cruel, and Sasuke would never forgive them. Stalking wasn’t going to work either, not unless they wanted to drive Sasuke to defecting again.
So there was only one thing left to do. Naruto and Sakura looked up to exchange a look, having had the same idea at the same time. They smiled, high-fived and tossed excitedly around in their sleeping bags as they whispered excitedly about how awesome their plan was, before they exchanged a goodnight kiss and went to sleep on Sasuke’s front porch.
The next day, they waltzed into the Uchiha compound, and bullied, sweet-talked and finally manhandled Sasuke into sharing a quaint little apartment with them downtown, claiming that it wasn’t healthy for him to stay cooped up inside like that all day, like the cantankerous old man who lived in the flat next to Kakashi’s and insisted on kicking puppies.
Sasuke denied to ever having kicked puppies - that was heartless, even for him - more than he protested to being literally dragged out of the house against his will. Actually, he hadn’t protested nearly as much as he should have, because by now, their persistence was wearing thin on the frayed edges of his patience, and he figured that if he wanted some peace and quiet any time soon, he might as well just give in right now, before he murdered them later in a fit of annoyance.
Partn two should be up soon!
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