Intro Critique
Just putting this rp intro up so it can get rated
Divide by three, carry the eight-No, that wasn’t right. Multiply by the remainder, take the square root of-again, wrong. The paper was crumpled in a very angry manner, hurled across the room in the direction of the wastebasket. It landed in the metal bin with the softest thud sound, barely audible as it nestled itself among several other papers.
“Damn it…must be late if I can’t even get the simple stuff right.” A glance towards the clock on the far wall confirmed his suspicion. It was already close to eleven o’clock. If he had a family to go back home to, they would be worried sick. Unfortunately all he had to go back home to was TiVo and TV dinners. The world’s finest cook, he certainly wasn’t.
With an exasperated sigh he slumped over the desk, head tilted slightly in the direction of his laptop. The desktop background displayed a picture of him and another young man, arms around each other, wide grins plastered on both of their faces. He still hadn’t changed it, and the breakup had been months ago. Another moment passed, and he watched as the picture was replaced by the scrolling words ‘Note to self: Leave less notes to self’ in bold red letters. His sense of humor wasn’t exactly tasteful-or funny, for that matter.
There was a soft knock at the door and he straightened up, closing his laptop with one hand. “Come in.” the man called, wondering who else had stayed late today. The door opened slowly, a dark haired man poked his head in the room. The very same man from the photo that called the desktop his home.
“Daniel, I thought you’d still be here.” He said brightly, stepping inside the room. Daniel forced a smile on his face, drawing his laptop closer and sliding it into his black messenger bag. It was hard to avoid someone who worked in the same office building as you.
“Hey Michael.” He replied simply, standing up and slinging the bag over his shoulder. “I was just leaving though.” He crossed the room towards the coat rack by the door, fingers curling around his brown leather jacket as he stared at his ex. It was hard to even look at him.
”Oh, thought so.” Michael said with a small nod. He turned to leave, before he was stopped by Daniel. In the time he had taken to turn to leave, Daniel had reached out, tugging lightly on the smaller man’s shirt. Michael’s amber eyes met the slate grey ones, and for a moment the two were silent, holding eye contact with each other.
“Mike…you sure?” Came Daniel’s voice, slightly hushed.
“Danny.” Michael looked away, slight blush tracing across his cheeks. He let out a soft squeak of surprise as Daniel’s strong, toned arms were flung around him, pulling him close. “No! Let me go-Danny, I-Stop!” For a moment his pleas were ignored, Daniel taking slow, deep breaths as he was hit with waves of memories.
“Please, Danny…let me go.” Michael’s soft murmur finally snapped him out of it. He instantly released his former lover, stony expression on his lightly tanned face. Disappointment welled with in him, directed at himself more than anything. Even now, he couldn’t accept that things were over. It was just too hard to accept. A slow sigh came from Daniel, fingers trailing through dirty blonde hair.
“Michael…I’m sorry.” He said finally, shaking his head slowly.
“It-…it’s alright.” The smaller of the two said after some hesitation.
“See you on Monday then?”
“Yeah, on Monday.” With that, Michael turned from the doorway and took off down the hallway, at a rather quick pace. Daniel couldn’t help but laugh to himself as the slightly flustered man scurried off. Daniel stepped out of the office, locking the door behind him. Heading in the direction opposite of his ex, he opted to take the stairs down the lobby. The water of the fountain trickled softly, the only noise in the dark building.
He set his bag down by the fountain for a moment, sliding his arms into the jacket before picking up his bag once more and heading outside into the bitter night air. There was only one car in the parking lot, a small red Chevrolet. Not his-Michael’s. At the moment he was without a car. It had had a bad run in with a tree, unfortunately. At least the tree had suffered more harm than his car.
It wasn’t too bad, he supposed. There was nothing wrong with getting your daily exercise, and his home wasn’t too far away from the building. Most days he just took the bus or a cab anyways, so it didn’t matter. His home was rather small, one story, one bedroom, one bathroom-He could afford better, but he didn’t need it.
Daniel inhaled the night air deeply, releasing it in one long, slow puff of white. Tonight he needed some time to think. So walking it was.
It had been no more than fifteen minutes of a brisk walk before he came across the park, where he and Michael had come together so many times…No. He tried to stop himself from thinking about it. But it was practically impossible. He came to a complete stop, right at the start of the path that wound its way through park.
“Well…maybe just a short walk.” He said to himself, fingers closing tightly around the strap of his bag. With that, he took off down the path, the sole person walking down along beneath the lamplight. His walk soon turned into a jog, laptop clunking against his thigh. Daniel let it slide off his shoulder, abandoning it beneath a lamppost. Was he worried about someone taking it? Hardly. Besides, it was easily replaced.
Sprinting at full force, Daniel made his way down the path, head down and eyes staring straight down at his feet as he ran. The wind whipped at his face, cold and stinging, but he hardly noticed. The running process reversed itself, sprint turning to a jog, jog turning to a walk, and walk turning to panting while leaning against a lamppost.
“Damn it all.” He muttered, shaking his head as he used the green metal pole to support himself. The man let himself sink to the ground, head tilting up towards the sky. “I…” The man trailed off, voice dissolving into a soft sob. It wasn't fair...it just wasn't fair. Where had he gone wrong?
No.
He wasn't going to think about. Michael was nothing more than a memory now, barely even human. Just a thought, a name lingering on the tip of his tongue. If he worked at, he could forget. No, he would forget. Erase the other from his memory. Completely, entirely. Like he never existed.
Or even better...A replacement. His new Michael. Yes...that would work. A new Michael, even better than the old one. Slowly, Daniel lifted himself from the ground, arms curling tightly around the lampost.
"Michael..." His voice was nothing more than a soft whimper. The strangest look seemed to flash in his eyes--extreme sorrow mixed with a touch of mailce. "Oh Michael..."
Divide by three, carry the eight-No, that wasn’t right. Multiply by the remainder, take the square root of-again, wrong. The paper was crumpled in a very angry manner, hurled across the room in the direction of the wastebasket. It landed in the metal bin with the softest thud sound, barely audible as it nestled itself among several other papers.
“Damn it…must be late if I can’t even get the simple stuff right.” A glance towards the clock on the far wall confirmed his suspicion. It was already close to eleven o’clock. If he had a family to go back home to, they would be worried sick. Unfortunately all he had to go back home to was TiVo and TV dinners. The world’s finest cook, he certainly wasn’t.
With an exasperated sigh he slumped over the desk, head tilted slightly in the direction of his laptop. The desktop background displayed a picture of him and another young man, arms around each other, wide grins plastered on both of their faces. He still hadn’t changed it, and the breakup had been months ago. Another moment passed, and he watched as the picture was replaced by the scrolling words ‘Note to self: Leave less notes to self’ in bold red letters. His sense of humor wasn’t exactly tasteful-or funny, for that matter.
There was a soft knock at the door and he straightened up, closing his laptop with one hand. “Come in.” the man called, wondering who else had stayed late today. The door opened slowly, a dark haired man poked his head in the room. The very same man from the photo that called the desktop his home.
“Daniel, I thought you’d still be here.” He said brightly, stepping inside the room. Daniel forced a smile on his face, drawing his laptop closer and sliding it into his black messenger bag. It was hard to avoid someone who worked in the same office building as you.
“Hey Michael.” He replied simply, standing up and slinging the bag over his shoulder. “I was just leaving though.” He crossed the room towards the coat rack by the door, fingers curling around his brown leather jacket as he stared at his ex. It was hard to even look at him.
”Oh, thought so.” Michael said with a small nod. He turned to leave, before he was stopped by Daniel. In the time he had taken to turn to leave, Daniel had reached out, tugging lightly on the smaller man’s shirt. Michael’s amber eyes met the slate grey ones, and for a moment the two were silent, holding eye contact with each other.
“Mike…you sure?” Came Daniel’s voice, slightly hushed.
“Danny.” Michael looked away, slight blush tracing across his cheeks. He let out a soft squeak of surprise as Daniel’s strong, toned arms were flung around him, pulling him close. “No! Let me go-Danny, I-Stop!” For a moment his pleas were ignored, Daniel taking slow, deep breaths as he was hit with waves of memories.
“Please, Danny…let me go.” Michael’s soft murmur finally snapped him out of it. He instantly released his former lover, stony expression on his lightly tanned face. Disappointment welled with in him, directed at himself more than anything. Even now, he couldn’t accept that things were over. It was just too hard to accept. A slow sigh came from Daniel, fingers trailing through dirty blonde hair.
“Michael…I’m sorry.” He said finally, shaking his head slowly.
“It-…it’s alright.” The smaller of the two said after some hesitation.
“See you on Monday then?”
“Yeah, on Monday.” With that, Michael turned from the doorway and took off down the hallway, at a rather quick pace. Daniel couldn’t help but laugh to himself as the slightly flustered man scurried off. Daniel stepped out of the office, locking the door behind him. Heading in the direction opposite of his ex, he opted to take the stairs down the lobby. The water of the fountain trickled softly, the only noise in the dark building.
He set his bag down by the fountain for a moment, sliding his arms into the jacket before picking up his bag once more and heading outside into the bitter night air. There was only one car in the parking lot, a small red Chevrolet. Not his-Michael’s. At the moment he was without a car. It had had a bad run in with a tree, unfortunately. At least the tree had suffered more harm than his car.
It wasn’t too bad, he supposed. There was nothing wrong with getting your daily exercise, and his home wasn’t too far away from the building. Most days he just took the bus or a cab anyways, so it didn’t matter. His home was rather small, one story, one bedroom, one bathroom-He could afford better, but he didn’t need it.
Daniel inhaled the night air deeply, releasing it in one long, slow puff of white. Tonight he needed some time to think. So walking it was.
It had been no more than fifteen minutes of a brisk walk before he came across the park, where he and Michael had come together so many times…No. He tried to stop himself from thinking about it. But it was practically impossible. He came to a complete stop, right at the start of the path that wound its way through park.
“Well…maybe just a short walk.” He said to himself, fingers closing tightly around the strap of his bag. With that, he took off down the path, the sole person walking down along beneath the lamplight. His walk soon turned into a jog, laptop clunking against his thigh. Daniel let it slide off his shoulder, abandoning it beneath a lamppost. Was he worried about someone taking it? Hardly. Besides, it was easily replaced.
Sprinting at full force, Daniel made his way down the path, head down and eyes staring straight down at his feet as he ran. The wind whipped at his face, cold and stinging, but he hardly noticed. The running process reversed itself, sprint turning to a jog, jog turning to a walk, and walk turning to panting while leaning against a lamppost.
“Damn it all.” He muttered, shaking his head as he used the green metal pole to support himself. The man let himself sink to the ground, head tilting up towards the sky. “I…” The man trailed off, voice dissolving into a soft sob. It wasn't fair...it just wasn't fair. Where had he gone wrong?
No.
He wasn't going to think about. Michael was nothing more than a memory now, barely even human. Just a thought, a name lingering on the tip of his tongue. If he worked at, he could forget. No, he would forget. Erase the other from his memory. Completely, entirely. Like he never existed.
Or even better...A replacement. His new Michael. Yes...that would work. A new Michael, even better than the old one. Slowly, Daniel lifted himself from the ground, arms curling tightly around the lampost.
"Michael..." His voice was nothing more than a soft whimper. The strangest look seemed to flash in his eyes--extreme sorrow mixed with a touch of mailce. "Oh Michael..."