Durations

[indicoyote]

I realized this weekend that for the last month or so I've just kinda been blah, not thinking of much to do, not trying to do anything, just waiting with detached expectation that something was going to change and make things interesting, again. It hasn't been an awful time in my life, at all, nothing like that, just a distinct different... feeling, to things, as compared to the months before. I think it may have to do with something I've sort of been musing on since graduation; for the last five years or so, my life was basically broken up into packets of about four months at a time. A semester, punctuated by a holday, another semester, and then summer. At least twice a year, something would change dramatically, and I'd have new stuff to experience and adjust to. As it turns out, I seem to really thrive on that sort of thing. It kept things interesting even in places like Socorro. Now, though, here I am, in a job and a reasonably good life position, with no (specific) end in sight. This is not to say I'm hoping for something to come along and mess it up, but I think it might explain why I've just been sort of.. expecting... something... since late January or so. I don' think it's a coincidence that that's about when the new semester started at school.

Fortunately, here I do have a lot more opportunities to try out new situations by myself, rather than just wait to get thrust into them by the whims of the school schedule. It's just that it takes more awarenesa and effort to actually DO it now. I've just got to try.